


Baby Blocks

by theWallflower



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: F/M, Pregnancy, Teen Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-05-31
Updated: 2006-05-31
Packaged: 2017-10-14 20:29:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 70,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/153160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theWallflower/pseuds/theWallflower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Squall learns that Selphie and Irvine are about to have a baby. With two weeks before the wedding, how will the 'children of fate' cope with their personal convictions that threaten to break their friendships apart?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day 1: Monday

`This story is in no way intended to infringe on the established copyrights and trademarks of Square-Enix Co., Ltd. It is for entertainment purposes only and is not intended for sale. It may be freely distributed providing that no alterations to the story are made.`

`The characters and incidents portrayed and the names in this story used herein are fictitious and any similarity to the name, character, or history of any person, living, dead, or otherwise, is purely coincidental and unintentional.`

`Dedicated to Samantha "Sammi"`

* * *

 ** _Baby Blocks_**  
by Eric J. Juneau

 _No, I don't know what I'm going to do about it._

 _I hate to use that word, but it's true._

 _What about your future plans?_

 _This is a good thing._

 _Can you imagine what his reaction must have been?_

 _You could wait._

 _She really only has herself to blame._

 _How do you tell someone something like that?_

 _Maybe. I was just thinking._

 _You have to take the consequences for your actions._

 _We've all been lied to about this._

 _Life is full of surprises._

 _People only see what they want to see._

 _What goes through your mind when you find something like that out?_

 _She's not a little girl._

 _It's not like either of them wanted this._

 _Oh my god, I'm so happy for you._

 _Did you ever think about what this means?_

 _It's never gonna be the same with them. They're not gonna be the same people we knew._

 _She's making a right decision._

 _If you mention bad things, they're going to happen._

 _He's the only thing she really wants._

 _It's gonna be great._

 _She says she 'thinks' it's right._

 _I still don't regret anything._

 _I don't want to judge._

 _You can't help but judge. That's what life is, evaluating your situation and surroundings._

 _I have no opinion._

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can still remember it happening. I can still remember the emotions I felt. I can still remember the surprise, the shock, the anger, the hatred, the prejudice, and everything else. When you're struggling with just day-to-day ordinaries, those really big bumps in the road can wreak havoc on you, so much that you stop completely before you realize what you'd hit. Those obstacles can't be avoided, because you never see then coming. There's no way you can see them coming.

I never told her afterwards about all this, and I don't think she'll ever know. I can only hope that the mistakes of the past aren't repeated. I can only hope that she's doing a good enough job to make sure this never happens again. Everything had already been set in course by the time I knew about it. It was far deep in the thick of things. I probably couldn't have prevented it even if I had been able to go back in time and do so. I wouldn't have known what to stop, so many little things add up to one big one. It was those two weeks that were the hardest. I can remember exactly what happened during those two weeks, but everything else after that I don't, because it's all insignificant to me.

But it can't amount to one iota of what they were going through.

DAY 1 - MONDAY

Squall scooped up a pile of dry gravely sand in his leather-gloved hand. Tiny grains sparkled in the hot sun against the smooth matted black. He opened his fingers for a quick look at the sandy stars, then tilted his palm to let them fall. The wind blew off the dust into brown smoke and the grains dropped like a waterfall back onto the ground.

The brief interlude of tranquility gently nudged Squall away from the tedium of his location, but only for a second. The parched air of the Nortes Mountains was so unlike the briny scent of his Balamb island continent that sometimes those little slices of serenity were what he needed. They especially kept his mind off the sounds going on behind him.

He turned to check on the progress of his team. Several men in white and blue-trimmed uniforms were unloading packages to the milling SeeD members and other personnel, grumbling and heaving noisily. Despite the grunt work, the mood seemed to be light and enjoyable as the team members took the supplies and ran them to their respective depots with enthusiasm becoming to a SeeD and annoying to their commander.

Squall turned away from the bustling and looked down into the valley. The mobile science camp was currently situated on a level shelf-like table of the mountain, not relatively far from ground level. Half was shaded by the sierra range, the other half left to roast in the dry equatorial sun. Loose dry sand and gray pebbles loaded this mountainside like a landfill. Every once in a while, a small mound of dirt would tumble down into the sloping basin, but that was about the limit for excitement here. Very few animals or monsters existed this high up, only a few sprigs of dry, arid plant life, not even enough for goats to munch on. Essentially a wasteland, albeit a brightly illuminated one, judging by the high sun in the sky.

He noticed a SeeD cadet jogging towards him, a young boy with silky medium brown hair. "Commander Leonhart, sir, we're running out of room in the tent to put the supplies. What should we do?" he gasped, either out of breath from running or heavy lifting.

"Put them outside the tent."

"Oh, ok, thanks," he ran back to the activity at camp.

Squall furrowed his brows with contempt. Quistis had once told him in class how there were no stupid questions in this world. Sure, practical for a teacher, but in the real world where time was never on your side and people weren't always there to answer questions, it was different. These new SeeDs coming up in the program were seeking more adventure and less work. They didn't have any idea of the duress it took, just the glory afterwards. If any of these SeeDs were going to be taking leadership roles in the future, then they had better start taking more initiative. They didn't need to come to him with every single little problem when the answers were obvious. It wasn't hard. All you needed to do was take responsibility when things screw up. That was about fifty percent of his job.

Squall figured the position of Garden Commander was somewhere in between being the headmaster and a SeeD. At Garden he had administrative duties to perform, but he was still called on from time to time to do these mercenary missions. After time compression though, the world quieted down and everything seemed dull. Too many SeeD missions these days dealt with menial security - security for concerts, security for parties, security for cities. They were not the world's bouncers. SeeDs were capable of so much more - covert ops, military training, search and rescue. The worst one was when they were asked to clean up trash after a parade. Such was the life of a mercenary - you didn't get much say in what jobs you could take. This mission he was on right now was so simple and safe they had arranged a group of students to experience real fieldwork firsthand. Sort of on-the-job training. Usually cadets didn't take fieldwork this early, but circumstances had changed.

Since time compression and the defeat of Ultimecia, the world was free from fear of the Sorceress. With the sweet-tempered Rinoa being the only known one in the world at present, conflicts were at an all-time low. Along with that came the notoriety of Balamb Garden being the origin of the fine upstanding heroes that made the peace possible in the first place. So everyone and their mother wanted to become a SeeD. Before, the rigorous training program of Garden translated to fewer students who made the cut and a lack of positions to fill. Now they couldn't keep up with all the submissions and new students. The lack of qualified teachers meant having to do two, sometimes three, jobs at once. And money was stretched tight as ever, with not enough mercenary work for the people who wanted to do it.

So that left him here, practically stranded somewhere in the Nortes Mountains in Esthar with a boatload of rookies and a stuffy research team. Apparently they were mining for some ore here in the bluffs and needed a security team to help protect them from the monsters that roamed the region. Despite their worries, attacks were actually more rare in the mountains than they realized, which resulted in a bored commander. Watching them pick apart rocks was not exciting stuff. This, plus his negative association with Esthar, made it a tiresome chore. He missed his friends, he missed his work, he missed Rinoa.

Squall spun around and trodded back into the research camp to see how progress was being made with unloading supplies. The covered off-road truck was nearly empty of its boxes. Underclassmen were unpacking and storing the food, medical packs, and other necessities in their designated areas. Researchers wearing dirt spackled white jumpsuits with utility belts walked back and forth between the dig site and the camp, interweaving between the white standing tents and a few army green mobile lab units distributed along the cliff top. Squall thought this was the most activity he had seen in quite a while. A testament to the tedium of being posted out here in the middle of nowhere.

"Bolcor, can you come over to the site? I think I've found something!" shouted one of the clients from the sloping elevation above them. This caused quite a stir among the population down there and nearly every geologist not doing something important dropped their business and followed up the incline. Squall followed as well, digging his ankles into the sandy cliffside. There was a sneaking worry in the back of his mind, as the dig site was away from the protected domestic area and a collection of monster snacks were heading towards it.

Squall breached the top of the steep incline, poking his head over the ledge like Carbuncle. The scientists were heading to a point around the corner of a stone steeple, far away from the site and protection of the students. Alarm bells went off in his mind, unnecessary as they might have been. He looked back down to the camp below him and spotted the two closest cadets. "Harper! Elrim! Get up here!"

The students looked at him on the crag, a little stupefied for a moment at being roused out of their daily duties, put down their packages and began the rigorous climb. Squall didn't wait for them, they would find him and follow him. He hoisted himself the rest of the way and hotfooted it to the researcher's location. About three-quarters of them were huddled around a small crack in the cliff face as one of them tried explaining things.

"You see this vein here that looks kind of silvery and sparkly. Right next to that. I tested it for dioxin and there was a point oh-two variance," he explained as he made a circling motion with his finger. Squall crept up behind them and listened in. He wasn't overly concerned that they were beyond a safe boundary - nowhere here was one hundred percent safe. He just wanted to keep an eye on them. The lean-to spire they were under shaded them deeply from the noon sun. The ledge continued somewhere around the bend, back in the sunlight.

"There's not much deviation from the hardline face," said one of the onlookers in amazement.

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Is there much refraction when you look at it through the spectro-analyzer?"

"I don't know. I haven't tested that yet. But if there is, gentlemen, I believe we may have found what we're looking for." Murmurs of joy scurried through the crowd.

Through his time there, Squall had gathered they were looking for some sort of metal like adamantine, but that was about it. The geologists now began to talk about back slopes, glaciation, loess, and stratification, all of which Squall tuned out. The babble that he was forced to listen to made him long to be back at Garden.

Thankfully, tonight was troop rotation. This was the last day of Squall's mission here. They would be sending in a fresh load of students and overseers and he would get to go home. Even though his stint here was a week, the fact that he felt like it was a waste of his time made it feel longer. As the only SeeD here, there wasn't anyone to associate with. He had to take on the role of authoritative instructor and nothing else. Being back home would be sweet.

On and on, the scientists droned about what they would have to do in order to move the dig site over to this cliff, about the length of the vein, the type of equipment, crunching numbers out loud. One of them even pulled out a map they had brought up and was looking at it with a couple others. Squall rolled his eyes, figuring he would be up here a lot longer than he wanted.

The way his eyes rolled, they came to rest on the path that curved around the ledge in the sun's light. A small unusual shadow was poking out. Squall grimaced. The shape and movement told him it wasn't a person behind there. A low grunt sounded, confirming his fears.

Before he could react, the red snaking head of a Ruby Dragon snapped around the corner and roared at the group, its sharp tooth-filled mouth gaping wide.

The geologists screamed in terror and chaotically darted in the opposite direction, crawling over each other in the narrow passageway. One of the researchers on the outside began to slip down the cliff face, having been pushed off. Squall instinctively grabbed his hand and used the momentum to swing him up and forward, back on the ledge. He kept going, not even breaking out of his run. As soon as the last one passed by Squall immediately hurried after them, protecting the rear as the Ruby Dragon followed the humans, pounding its claws into the cliff top.

The commander noticed the two cadets he had called for earlier just now approaching and getting nearly run over by the stampeding geologists. They flailed their arms in the air, letting them pass without getting knocked over.

"MOVE!" Squall shouted to them. "Move back!"

The students stood there dumbly in his way until Squall caught up with them and pulled on their uniforms to get them to follow.

"Move back!" he said. "We'll get him into a better position and take him down."

"The dragon?"

"No, the geologists. Of course, the dragon!" Squall snapped. He sprinted down the plains and further into a flat open area of the cliff, bathed in bright sunlight. The Ruby Dragon screeched like piano wire as it pursued, coming out of the shadow of the cliff face, gnashing its ivory serrated teeth. Squall could feel the vibration of its flat clawed limbs hitting the ground as it ran after them. He pulled out his trusted gunblade and turned to face it in one smooth motion.

"Battle formation!" he shouted. These students were first and foremost trained in battle so he knew they could be relied upon. How much was another matter. The scared cadets spaced themselves out, creating a triple-sided barrier between the dragon and access to the camping site. They pulled out their swords - the basic weapon all students were required to learn - and held them ready to duel.

The dragon pounded its forelimbs as it reached the barricade, shaking its gargantuan head violently. Its massive black horns swung dangerously back and forth, threatening to club them. The monster backed up, stomped its feet, and opened its maw. Fiery breath billowed forward.

Squall bounded back out of the range of the familiar scorching waves, bringing his arm to his face for additional protection. The other two, unfamiliar with the attacks of this monster, skittered back and forth, finally getting the sense to duck on the ground as the full brunt of the blow swept over them.

Harper on the right jumped back onto his feet. Figuring he would need to beef himself up with protection if he was going to survive this fight, he began casting a spell. Brandishing his sword in the air, he shouted "Reflect!"

"No! You id-" Squall started to say but stopped himself. It was too late anyway. A shining opaque shield glimmered in front of him and then faded out of visibility.

Immediately, the dragon pounded its fist into the ground, casting its own Reflect spell, just as Squall expected. The same opaque shield came up around it and then washed out.

"Wait for my instructions," Squall shouted. "Ruby Dragons cast Reflect when you cast Reflect."

"Sorry, sir," the offending student said.

Squall sighed. "Does anyone have a dispel?"

No one piped up, as they looked at each other dumbly. Now no one could use magic against it, making the battle doubly difficult. He didn't have any himself, because he stopped using Guardian Forces a long time ago.

"Does anyone have any ice magic?" Squall shouted angrily.

"I do!" the second student shouted above the din.

"I do too," the first said.

Finally, a little luck. "All right, both of you put ice on your blades, and guard against fire attacks. When I say go, both of you flank him on either side and start hammering at him. I'll drive up the middle. Don't try to be a hero. And don't do anything stupid. Understand?"

They nodded. "Yes, sir!"

"All right, go!"

The two students barreled forward towards the dragon, their arms held stiffly in front of them. They began attacking its peripheries, slicing up and down with their swords. The dragon snapped its head back and forth, becoming confused at two targets attacking it on either side, moving its head between the two, slowed down by the bulk of its horns.

Squall dove in and thrust upward into the dragon's chest with his gunblade, just below his turned-away neck, not only further distracting him, but creating more damage. He pulled upward on the handle until the blade was buried deep in the thick hide, almost halfway in, and pulled the trigger. He heard the muffled boom of his exploding round tearing its way through the monster's body - a devastating hit. The dragon reared its head back, roaring with agony as Squall yanked the blade out of its chest. Acting on pure instinct, it slashed Squall away with its massive ebony claws. The commander rolled away on the grass, not fighting against the momentum, coming to a dead stop at the beginning of a sand hill. He shook his head to reorient himself. The blow wasn't that powerful, meaning the dragon wasn't very strong, another bit of good luck. Elrim looked at Squall, distracted for a moment and getting ready to run over to help.

"Keep attacking!" Squall shouted, before he had the chance. "Don't let up! No matter what!"

Without delay, he kept lacerating the Ruby Dragon without missing a beat. Squall adjusted his gunblade and rushed forward, immediately hacking and slashing at the monster with incredible speed. With his skill, the Ruby Dragon suffered through each blow on its tough hide, snapping at its assaulters. But there was no telling if it would be enough before the dragon decided to unleash its full potential.

The dragon, as if realizing what strategy it was being subjected to, focused its attacks on Elrim, swinging its snaking head over and snapping its jaw at him. Elrim narrowly avoided getting his arm scissored off and stumbled to the ground. Squall saw his vulnerable position and ran up to the dragon.

"Hey, hey!" he declared as he sliced thinly along the neckline with the end of his gunblade. The wound was like a papercut, nonlethal but attention getting. The provoked dragon turned away from its prey, looking murderously at the commander. Squall continued poking it like a pincushion.

With animal reflexes the dragon smashed into the puny human with its head, then slashed cross-wise with its claws. Squall took the blow, purposefully standing in reaching distance. He was tossed around like a rag doll, his shirt ripped apart down the front. Sweat flew off the wet hair matting his face. As the dragon turned to its next victim, Squall wobbled back up to fighting stance.

"Get over here! Come after me!"

Sparks surrounded the dragon's head and he cast Fira on Squall. A burst of magic flame enveloped his body, and he stood there and took it, suffering through the heat.

Harper moved forward to help his commander. "What is he doing?" he stammered, incredulous that the commander was purposefully provoking the dragon to take hits meant for his students.

"No, wait," Elrim stopped him. "I think..."

Squall then felt the power, a great emotion building up in him that had to be released in a furious blow.

A circle of light spread out from Squall on the dirt, surrounding him as he held up his gunblade. He rushed forward towards the monster and bounded to the sky, slashing upward with a monstrous blow. He seemed to stay suspended in mid-air for a moment. Then he dived down again, slicing with his blade straight and true into the dragon's neck. In a rage, he peeled off a flurry of slices and strikes, swinging the blade up and down repeatedly, creating an energy trail behind it as he ran around its body. The Ruby Dragon snapped back over and over as he felt each hard blow delivered.

Squall returned to its front and powered up again, this time to perform the Lionheart maneuver. A coil of energy formed out the air and spun down into him, as he held his gunblade to the side, charging up power like the light of the sun. He rushed forward and delivered an unyielding pattern of rapid strikes, almost inhumanly slicing through the Ruby Dragon like a blender. The monster breathed heavily in and out, taking the hits without retaliation. With a mighty final blow Squall channeled his energy and struck forth. The dragon swayed back and forth in place and slumped to the ground, lifeless.

Squall cocked the gunblade back, opening the chamber, and reloaded it with specialized bullets from his belt as the two other students whooped and hollered in excitement, having taken down their first strong monster.

"Oh my god, did you see that? That was awesome!"

"I can't believe we did that! We took down a Ruby Dragon!"

The group of scientists who were watching on the sidelines, scampered up the hill and approached Squall.

"Are you all right?"

Squall nonchalantly resheathed his gunblade. "Fine," he said emotionlessly.

The research team gathered around him, lauding him with praise.

"Thank you so much!"

"Congratulations!"

"That was a Ruby Dragon!"

"I can't believe we're still alive!"

"That was almost single-handedly done."

"SeeD is the greatest!"

"Thank you! Thank you!"

It seemed no matter what these geologists did, Squall was irritated with them. "All right, all right, thank you. It was nothing. Just... go back to work... or something."

The scientists began to disperse, still discussing the great accomplishment, as Squall approached the two students. "And that's why we study monsters. If we know their weaknesses, they can be defeated when we're at a disadvantage."

"Yes, sir," they responded.

"Good work. Get to the medic and get treated if you need it."

Suddenly, Squall felt something in his pocket vibrate. The shock startled the hell out of him, much to his chagrin. It was his PHS phone. He struggled to tug it out of his pocket, flip it open, and get a grasp on the antenna with his leather-clad hand. Without looking at the display, he clicked the green button, and held it up to his ear.

"Hello?"

No answer. He repeated his greeting, but all he could hear was some muffled, excited talking. The sound disconnected to silence after eight seconds. He took it off his ear and read the display to see who was calling. The read-out said 'Recent Calls: (1) RINOA'.

"Problem?" Harper asked.

Squall realized he had made a face, prompting the question. "No, just get going," he commanded.

The students sped off back down to the camp. It was unusual for Rinoa to call when he was on the field unless it was something special or important. On the other hand, it was also possible she had accidentally sat on the call button or something. He had gotten misdirected calls before. These new communication devices were something of an experiment, using defunct satellites to track the signals, so Squall was wary of them working properly. More specifically, he hated the fact that he could easily get interrupted at any time now, even while working. He put the phone back in his pocket and walked back down the hill to the camp.

As soon as he was halfway down he felt his pocket vibrate again. Ready for it this time he pulled it out, flipped it, and hit the receive button. Again, the display ID said it was from Rinoa.

"Hello?"

"...Hello?"

"Rinoa?"

"Hi, are you still on the field?" Active, mumbled voices continued in the background.

"Yes." Of course, he was. The troop rotation wasn't scheduled until later that night and she knew that.

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"It's a surprise."

Squall rolled his eyes, half-watching the camp. He really hated surprises, but he decided to humor her. Rinoa wouldn't have called unless it was something big. He began to rattle off predictable possibilities of 'big news' in a blasé manner.

"All right, um, you found a new job, Cid is stepping down, somebody's moving, they found another Sorceress, somebody's pregnant, somebody died, Zell is getting a promotion-"

"Wait, go back, you were close on the pregnant thing."

"What? Somebody's pregnant?" Squall's heart sank. No matter what, this was going to have a drastic change in life as he knew it. "You're pregnant?" Squall knew this wasn't true, but had no other guesses.

"Nope," she said gleefully.

"Uh, who else do I know that's been married recently?"

"Come on, who do we know?"

Squall tried to think of all the girls he knew. "Uh, Quistis, Xu, you, Selphie, Fujin, Matron-"

"Wait, go back."

Squall repeated his list slower, "Xu, Quistis, Selphie-"

"There."

"Selphie? Selphie's pregnant?"

 _Oh god._

"And guess what else?"

"What?"

"Guess."

"Just tell me." The guessing game had now lost all its fun.

"No, guess."

"Just tell me."

"Selphie and Irvine got engaged and they're getting married in two weeks!"

"Oh... I see."

"Isn't that exciting?"

"I thought they were broken up."

"Well, they... got back together. I think it happened on the trip down to Galbadia two weeks ago."

"Uh-huh," he said dryly.

"We're going shopping for dresses tomorrow. We kinda gotta hurry, since the wedding's only a week from next Sunday."

"Uh-huh."

 _Oh, dear god, it's not happened._

"Yeah... so... I thought I'd tell you." Rinoa was sounding like she'd run out of things to say. "I really wanted to tell you now instead of waiting until you got back."

"Right." The conversation hung in the air.

"...Okay, well, I'll let you go now."

"Okay."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Squall closed up the PHS and put it back in his pocket. He glared outwards into space for a while.

Squall waited for something inside him to build up until it broke open and hatched, but it didn't come. He was unsure what he was feeling. There wasn't any pattern to this. Before he knew what he felt, but this... Selphie is pregnant. The news was so mixed he couldn't tell how he was supposed to react, so he simply didn't. Rinoa seemed so happy, so did everyone else in the background on the phone. Marriages were supposed to be happy. Selphie and Irvine were a happy couple now. The last Squall heard they weren't really together anymore. And now this. He had no response, save looking down into the dirt. He remained professional, keeping a proper demeanor. Selphie is pregnant. Those words kept repeating in his head. Selphie is pregnant. Selphie is pregnant. And Selphie and Irvine were getting married. This was not right. How was he supposed to react? These were his two friends, they'd had a relationship, but it never seemed right to him. Why wasn't he as happy as Rinoa?

Squall had a craving to get home, to be amongst his familiars. More than ever, he did not want to be there right now. He was missing out, he needed to be there in the thick of it, for some reason he could not understand. He needed to be there. Not here in this mountainous wasteland surrounded by strangers. He felt like he wasn't fulfilling his role here. The only problem was he had to oversee the troop rotation. That would be in only a few hours. Squall grumbled inwardly. He could have used his power to get on a train, but it made more sense to wait than to tread all the way to the train station and spend a bunch of money on a last-minute ticket. Practically speaking, he might as well stay. He wouldn't save more than two hours. There was nothing he could do about it.

The white tent flap nearby opened and an older SeeD emerged. "Commander," he said. "The transport carrying the troop rotation just radioed in, they say they're a little behind schedule, by a half an hour."

Squall suppressed a frustrating grunt. A half-hour more than what he expected. He just wanted to get out of here.

"Fine, you take care of it. Let me know when its finished and I can go home."

"Sir?" he said confusedly.

"I'll be in my tent until then. Don't bother me."

"Sir-"

"I said don't bother me."

Squall stormed away across the camp, thinking of what to do next, frustrated that he had to stay here in this massive waste of time. He didn't even need to go on this mission, he just volunteered to get out of Balamb for a while. He knew there was nothing more for him to do here. That Ruby Dragon attack was a fluke and the first of its kind. Any other monsters the students could easily handle themselves, and they were few and far between. Squall was just here to supervise, to run the show that didn't need running.

He wished he knew how to deal with this. This sort of thing had never happened before in his life. SeeDs and garden students were too busy with assignments and work and training for this sort of thing to ever come up. Families weren't even a concept for them. They were individuals, working individually, not couples.

"Sir?"

Squall looked up and saw Elrim coming over to him, presumably from the medical tent.

"Did something happen over the phone?"

"Nothing you need to know about," Squall rasped and walked back to his tent. This would be the longest two hours ever.

* * *

The Stealth & Covert Operations class he had taken as a cadet went wasted as Squall opened the door to his room much louder than he would have liked. His teacher would have been very disappointed, but he wasn't really trying. The only goal was to try and not wake Rinoa. She would not have waited up for him, not this late. He walked through the apartment quietly though.

This was a special double room, the largest dorm in Garden, especially for him and Rinoa to live together in. They added on new floors, new rooms, part of a whole new renovation made a year ago. The addition of new dorms included this for the... privileged.

The clock on the coffee machine said 2:30. From the moonlight breathing out from the window blinds he could see there were still dirty dishes everywhere on the sink and counter, waiting to be cleaned. Despite their age and maturity, they still treated the place like a dorm, like a temporary residence. Dishes were always a problem in this house. Squall usually ended up doing them, because he had to in order to make room for more.

He entered his bedroom, sending his feet out ahead to make sure not to step on Angelo, if he was waiting underfoot. He quietly unraveled his clothing, stripping down to his underpants and shirt. Rinoa was already scooched over to her side of the bed, and Squall peeled back the covers and slipped in, moving onto his back stiffly. He adjusted his body to make himself comfortable on the pillow, and breathed deep. Rinoa turned over and put her arm around Squall's chest, scooting over to cuddle with him.

"Mmmm... you smell good," she whispered. Unfortunately, he had roused her from sleep.

"I took a shower on the train," Squall responded.

She kept quiet after that, content to stay next to her boy. Squall stared up at the ceiling, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep much that night. This position was unusual to him because he usually slept on his side. But now, his eyes were wide open, staring at the textured ceiling, with Rin's arm draped on his chest. The thoughts in his head were spreading like a virus. Wondering about Selphie and Irvine. Wondering. Stuck in some state he couldn't describe. The conflicts were growing by the minute, and the solitude on the train hadn't helped any.

"Are you cold?" Rinoa asked quietly. "You're shivering."

"A little."

Rinoa snuggled in closer, tucking her head on Squall's chest. "You okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You sounded kinda weird over the phone."

Squall said nothing to this.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?" she asked.

"No."

"Are you afraid I'm gonna get the marriage itch too? Don't worry."

"I'm not. Rinoa, sleep."

"Oh, okay. Good night."

"Night."


	2. Day 2: Tuesday

DAY 2 - TUESDAY

Squall woke up early, before the alarm went off. Hazed out of his sleep, he had no remnants of dreams or inclination to get back to bed - fortunate for him, as he usually strived to stay under the covers as long as possible. Then he remembered what had happened yesterday. Selphie and Irvine were still getting married. Selphie was still pregnant. Great. There was this to deal with, and he still had a full day of work ahead of him.

It was still dark as he pulled off the sheets, just before sunrise. Probably six in the morning. He put on the clean clothes he found in the dresser and walked out to the bubbling coffee pot in the kitchen. Trying not to think as he pulled a ceramic mug from the cupboard, he peered through the darkness at the level of the coffee. Still not done yet. He was surprisingly awake for having gotten very little sleep that night. Only about three or four hours, he calculated. He would have a ton of work to do today, just having come back from a week away from his duties. It's not that there weren't people to do his work, they just had a lack of applied knowledge that was the killer. If they didn't know the subtleties of how he liked things done, or the most efficient way, they got screwed up. So they'd sooner put off the thing rather than make a potentially consequential mistake. So he'd be swamped today, probably work late. Just as well, anything to get his mind off the current events.

Agh, that's just what he didn't want to think about. Every time he thought about it there was a twinge of something in his stomach, like he had just drank a shot of some emotion. And it was something everyone was going to be talking about today. And he just wanted to avoid it. How was he supposed to cope with something like this? It felt like Selphie had just died.

The coffee machine's burbling slowed to a few sporadic pops and Squall turned it off. Holding his cup out, he took the pot and poured it close to the rim. Finished with this, he took a collection of papers he had set out on the counter the night before and quietly exited the room.

Garden at six in the morning was deader than dead. Disconcertingly silent. Hallways were big enough that they were supposed to have an abundance of students wandering between sections of garden. Classes didn't start until 7:30. Students didn't wake up until 7:29.

Logically, people were going to want to see how he was going to react, what his treatment on the Selphie situation would be. He was the figurehead of Garden and his view might affect how a lot of people thought on the matter. That was the last thing he wanted, for people to take his opinion just because it was his own, trying to emulate him because he was in power. The best way to treat the situation would be professionally, not personally. A good leader had to remain emotionless and opinionless, just like he had been doing in the beginning. This was to show he was not vulnerable to little things affecting him. Just as on the battlefield, being emotionally swayed during the heat of the moment was a nasty weakness, potentially devastating. It was better if he just treated it rationally and logically. Since Selphie and Irvine had nothing to do with his immediate job, it was a non-issue as far as he was concerned. He had no opinion.

The elevator dinged as it reached the third floor. At one point he needed special permission to come up here. Now he did it everyday. This floor had been renovated as well, especially to accommodate the piloting mechanism for mobile Garden. Now, Xu's secretary desk was the first thing one saw once they got off the lift. Beyond that was Cid's office. Squall's was to the left.

Xu was apparently an early riser as well. She was working busily at her desk as if it was the middle of the day.

"Morning, Squall," she said politely.

"Morning. Here's my report from the mission," he said, handing her the folder full of paper.

"Oof, already?" she said as she took it and put it on her desk.

"I did it on the train on the way back."

"Did you hear the news?"

"Yeah, I heard it."

"It's gonna be great. I haven't been to a wedding in a long time."

"What-" Squall halted himself. He was trying to stop saying 'whatever' anymore, part of his rehabilitation from being so distant and rude. "Yeah, me too," he said instead.

"Cid let me take most of the day off so I could go shopping with all the girls."

"Uh-huh. Is there anything that happened while I was gone that I should know about?"

Xu picked up a mass of papers in a tray on her desk. "Nothing too major happened while you were gone. Here's the business for today."

"I probably have a lot of clients that need reviewing."

"Yeah, there's a pile on your desk."

"Thanks," he said as he took the work and headed to his desk. The cluttered, but organized office was like a smaller, less grand version of Cid's, made from part of a closet and Cid's old office. Squall sat down at his desk and turned on his computer console. While waiting for it to boot up he took a look at the heavily laden 'in-box' for paper. In it was an assortment of SeeD request applications by various clients. The first job in choosing to hire out SeeDs was researching the hirers, finding out whom they worked for and their political ties. Then they would arrange an interview to see what kind of job they needed done, perhaps finding out what skills were needed, negotiating the fee and terms of the contract, possibly whether it would be a good candidate for a SeeD test. The underlying objective was to find out if one could trust the client, whether it wouldn't simply be a case of sending good men to their immediate deaths or conflict with other clients. Mercenarianism was a dangerous job, but that didn't mean it had to be suicidal. Squall picked up the first page and started reading.

* * *

Selphie and Xu took their tubs of ice cream away from the counter and went to find a seat. Rinoa and Quistis stepped up and looked at the clerk.

"I'll have a small chocolate with sprinkles," Rinoa said.

"I'll have a small vanilla," Quistis said.

The man went to work filling their orders, first Rinoa's. The raven-haired girl turned to her friend and continued their conversation. "I guess I could just blame it on the lack of sleep. But even on the phone. I mean, that doesn't explain the way he acted on the phone."

"He's just being standoffish."

"But he didn't say a thing. Don't you think that's a weird reaction?"

Quistis thought back to all the interaction she'd had with Squall over her life.

Rinoa stammered, "Er... don't answer that."

The clerk put two paper dishes of ice cream, one dark brown, one white, on the counter. The two girls replaced them with a few coins each and turned around to see where Selphie and Xu had sat down. The outdoor dining plaza in Balamb City was very beautiful. It was right in the middle of the city and surrounded by a variety of food kiosks and green potted plants. The four girls had chosen a round metal-grated table in the middle of the eating area.

"I just thought it was different from his usual standoffishness," Rinoa said as she scraped out the hard plastic-mesh chair and sat.

"Are you guys talking about Squall?" Selphie said.

Quistis then explained for Rinoa what had happened concerning the phone call she made last night and his behavior once he got home.

"Wow, that's weird," Selphie said. "And he was doing so good."

"I know. It's like he closed up all of a sudden," Rinoa said.

"I thought it was just a fluke," Quistis said, "You know, the shock. It'll wear off sometime."

"You know what I think," Rinoa said. "I think Squall is worried that I'm going to get the marriage bug. Cause we've been together for long enough, he's afraid that this is gonna put ideas in my head." There were some slight nods to that statement. "But that's way off. I told him I'm not even thinking about that yet."

Xu said, "If I was a guy I'd probably be worried about that. You guys aren't ready for... oh, I mean..."

Dead silence. All their eyes turned downward to their ice cream. Everyone felt like somebody needed to say something right now.

"Anyways..." Rinoa tried.

"Come on guys, don't be sad," Selphie chirped. "I'm getting married! I know what you guys all said about the train, but I still don't regret anything. This is a good thing. If you mention bad things, they're going to happen. Right? Now..." She pulled out her notepad and pencil from her yellow sundress and put them in front of her ice cream. "What other stores do we need to check out? We've still got Michael's and Glamour House to go."

"I think we can cross off Priceless Apparel," Rinoa said. "They were _so_ rude to us."

"I know, they wouldn't even help us out." Selphie laughed as she crossed out their name on the list. "Well, screw them, they don't get none of our business. Ha."

As the girls talked about their experiences in the previous shopping establishments, Quistis quietly nibbled her ice cream, thinking about the sweet subtle taste touching her tongue. The white vanilla color reminded her of the first dress Selphie had tried on. She perched in front of a box before three angled mirrors, looking at herself. Not swishing around to see the different angles of the dress, just herself. Her face, staring directly at her face, the pale peach of her skin lightened by the pallor of her dress. The expression on her face was... indescribable. It was a somber combination of incredulity and sadness. Once all the girls saw that face, they knew Selphie realized the magnitude of what she was into.

The aching pain in her feet roused Quistis back to the table conversation. She reached down to rub her ankle while Selphie continued listing her shopping itinerary breathlessly. "Okay, next time, tomorrow, we're going to have to shoe shop."

"I have a test tomorrow," Quistis said.

"For what?"

"No, I'm giving a test."

"Oh, right, duh. I keep forgetting we're out of school now. Heh, it's only been a year, you'd think I'd stop doing that by now," she laughed. "Okay, how about Thursday then?"

"That sounds good."

"Ugh," Rinoa said. "I can't believe we've been shopping for so long." She slumped back in her chair in fatigue.

"And there's still more to go," Selphie said excitedly. Quistis looked at her in disbelief. That girl had tons of energy to spare, like she ate sacks full of sugar for meals.

"Just how much are you willing to spend?" Xu asked.

"Well, I'm a 22-rank SeeD. I got enough salary coming in to spend on this. You only get married once, right?"

An awkward pause shrouded the table. The four girls quietly ate their ice cream, relaxing their weary legs. Every one of them had a thousand questions on their mind, all too inappropriate to ask. Neither did they want Selphie to feel like she was on an interrogative game show. She was their friend, so they were stuck in between seeming tactless or satiating their curiosity.

Xu broke the silence. "Did you ever think about waiting? I mean, you don't have to have the baby while you're married. You could wait."

"Yeah, that's true," the two other girls agreed. Xu was secretly relieved. Fortunately, no one in the group was fundamental enough as to not consider this at least as a possibility.

"We're getting married mostly for the financial reasons. Cause of the insurance money if Irvine dies on duty."

"Oh, yeah, I suppose," the girls agreed again.

"What about your future plans?" Quistis asked.

"Well, I don't know. I think I'm gonna keep working until I have the baby. Not on missions, of course, but other things in Garden probably. And then I'll take a year off to take care of it."

"Where are you going to stay?"

"Yeah, Garden doesn't have daycare facilities," Rinoa said, "Or anything set up to take care of a child."

"Right," Quistis concurred.

"No, no, I know. We talked about getting a place on Obel Lake, maybe, if we can find something affordable." Selphie popped her pencil in her mouth and studied her notepad. "I can't decide whether I like the formal or the informal dress."

"Quistis looked better in the formal than you did. I think she should be getting married instead," Rinoa said. To make things go faster, each of the girls had been trying on dresses, which led to many giggles.

Xu said, "I think you should go with the formal. Everything else about this is just about as informal as you could get, so you should try and get what traditions you can in there. Maybe. I was just thinking."

"That would mean Irvine would have to wear a tuxedo," Rinoa said delightedly.

"He doesn't wear his SeeD uniform?"

The three girls looked to Quistis for an answer, as if she was the leading authority on all things Garden.

"Um, I'm not sure. I'd have to check the regulations. I think he has to wear his SeeD uniform. It applies to boys, not girls."

"That sucks. I always wanted to see Irvine in formal wear," Rinoa said. "He always wears that duster all the time."

Selphie sighed, "Yeah, believe me, I've mentioned it many times."

"Hey, at least it looks good on him," Xu said.

The three helper girls blinked at each other. They all knew what they wanted to say, but they were trying to choose a spokeswoman with their eyes. Rinoa decided to volunteer.

"So have you... picked out a maid of honor?"

Selphie rocked back in her chair and laughed. "I was waiting for one of you guys to ask that," she snickered. Returning upright she said in a more serious tone, "OK, I've given it a lot of thought. And I wish I could have all you guys up there, but then there'd be no one in the audience," she smiled. "But I decided I want Quistis to be my maid of honor."

Xu and Rinoa smiled at Quistis. The blond was so surprised she nearly choked on her ice cream. "Me?" she asked.

"Yes, and I'll tell you why. When I was taking Strategic Tactics in classes, I was failing miserably. Remember? And Quistis helped me through it. She took time out of her day to tutor me. She even stayed up all night and studied with me for the final exam."

"Aw," Rinoa commented.

Xu said, "I can't deny you wanting her then."

"Yeah, so I figured if any of you guys deserve it, it's Quistis."

"I'd never stay up late studying for a test," Rinoa said. "Wow."

"Thanks," Quistis said.

"Ooh, that means we have to get you a dress too."

"Oh." Quistis thought of her aching feet. "Goody."

* * *

Squall entered his name into the computer panel log next to the entryway to the training room, slightly below the large green stripe that encircled the doorway. This had been newly installed to tell where students were, purely for safety reasons. In case a cadet went missing, and was injured in the training center, he or she could be found. It was not, as many students thought, a way for the administration to survey and monitor them. Just something so they could keep tabs, since the training center had its risks, no matter what skill level one was at.

Without much more than a cursory glance at the panel confirming his entry, he walked off into the heart of the jungle, fingering the sheathed gunblade on his belt. He followed a cut dirt path, brushing against the ferns and palm trees encircled by metallic wire fencing. This tropical environment was quite humid. He would be sweating before long, which was fine by Squall. He came here to sweat, to work off some steam. Maybe that would help him with this unnameable feeling.

His keen eye caught some movement behind a bush just before he crossed the metal bridge. Quick as a whip he pulled out his gunblade and spun to face it. It was a grat, wriggling behind the foliage, dragging its tentacles behind its sickly green pitcher plant body. Squall lowered his weapon and continued over the bridge. The grat was so weak it wouldn't be worth his time to fight, so he ignored it and continued over the breeding pit chasm.

He kept on his way, farther into the center. It was basically designed as a circle except for one stem-off, a thick gray door Squall was searching for. He found it before long and flipped open the lid to reveal the keypad lock.

Suddenly, two junior students ran up to him. He groaned inside.

"Commander Leonhart, Commander Leonhart!" they shouted, trying to get to him before he disappeared behind the door. Squall slapped the lid back down and faced the two encroachers.

"Yes?" he asked.

"We have a question about an assignment. We were hoping you could help us."

"What's the assignment?"

"We have to develop a combo attack for class, but we have no idea how to set one up."

"Didn't your teacher give you any more specific instruction than that?"

"It has to involve us using two enemies to our advantage. And we can't use black magic of any kind."

The other student piped up, "I was thinking we had to use some sort of draw attack, but I'm not sure that's what the teacher is looking for."

Squall grumbled. He had hated these sorts of creativity-based lessons when he was a student as well. Trying to figure out what the teacher wanted to see was like pulling teeth. Too little work to find the answer and you failed, too much work and it was a waste of time you needed for other studies. But Squall was a commander and that meant also being able to teach those under him when they needed help. Fortunately he had a strategy in mind.

"All right, follow me," Squall said, walking back into the training center. "Find a pair of grats."

After a short while, a student yelped, "There's two."

"All right," Squall said, pulling out his gunblade once again. "Engage."

The three rushed at the pair of monsters. The botanical fiends whipped around to their attackers and threatened harm by flailing their ridiculously long tentacles. One of the students almost tripped backwards as a vine snapped at his feet.

"No fear," Squall commanded. He was in a relaxed battle stance, not apprehensive at all of the monsters. "All right, now, if we can't use black magics, what does that leave? White magic and status ailments. Since white magic doesn't really do any good here, we can use ailments to our advantage. Lots of ways we can do this, but I'm going to show you my favorite one. Do any of you have a Confuse spell?" Squall hoped, as he remembered he carried no magic.

"I do."

"Fine. Cast it on one of the grats, then follow it up with a Blind on the same one."

The student did as he was told. First he waved his arm out and shouted the spell's name. The plant-beast began wobbling back and forth like it was drunk. He then cast a Blind spell and an inky cloud formed over the monster's head, presumably where its eyes were, or whatever it used to sense the outside world. The grat, falling into a panic, began whipping its vines dangerously to and fro, hitting its partner grat in the process, as it was the closest strikable object.

The students smiled as they began to realize what was happening. "Do the same thing to the other grat," Squall commanded.

The student who had performed the magic before did the same to the second enemy.

"Don't suppose any of you has a Haste?" Squall asked as the grats began to combat each other.

"I actually do," said the second student.

"Good, cast it on one or both of them. It'll speed up the process." Most junior classmen would never think of using a spell that would give an advantage to an opponent, but in this case, it worked wonders.

The student did so, casting it on both. The temporally enhanced beasts shredded each other to ribbons with their lacerating vines. In no time they collapsed, peeling apart like bananas, bleeding acidic green liquid.

"The Blind magic combined with the Confuse blocked them from sensing our presence. The Haste added to the mix. Then they found the nearest object to fight, each other." _Thus endeth the lesson_ , Squall thought curtly. He put away his gunblade.

"Wow, that's really cool. Thank you, sir."

Squall didn't bother fully acknowledging the praise, he simply nodded and headed back to the gray door in the back of the training center.

"Hey, what does that door lead to?" the students asked.

"It's a forbidden area," Squall responded.

"Well, we know that, but what is it forbidding?"

"It's an advanced training center for graduated SeeDs. It's restricted access, and believe me, you do not want what's beyond that door to break through to here."

That bit of scare tactic shut them up. Squall freely entered his access code into the numeric keypad as the students left to wander the rest of the training center. The pneumatic lock released and Squall pulled the heavy door open and closed it quickly.

This terrain was vastly different compared to the tropical jungle he had just come from. This was a strange dry wasteland of a forest. Thick stone-like trees peppered the landscape, their tops shrouded in humid white mist that obscured the ceiling. The trunks descended into hard gray soil, cracked into veiny apertures where they were implanted. This environment was conducive to the beast life they had transferred in. Desert for the chimera, forest for the hexadragon, and both for the death claw. Metal rings had to be used to reinforce the trunks as the soil was not very supportive. He wondered how the trees kept from drying to death. The faculty probably had to come in and water them manually, another one of their mysteries.

This was originally the 'secret area', where students met and hooked up after curfew, and was clearly against regulations. It was something Squall didn't care for very much, but he tolerated it, because he knew with the pressures of the work, kids needed some therapeutic way to lash out against authority. That's why he let it stay, until the opportunity presented itself with the remodeling. He then used the secret area and turned it into the advanced training center. Its geography made it the perfect place to have a part of the training center that was secured and sectioned off to normal students so they wouldn't be attacked by the stronger creatures. After the time compression incident, Squall found he could no longer keep sharp on T-Rexaurs, so he built this.

Before he got very far in he heard a rustling in a dry bush behind him. Squall took out his gunblade, expecting a death claw to barrel out with its talons ready. Nothing happened though. He reached out the end of his weapon and poked into the bush.

Zell careened out, bringing his fist down in a hammer strike, screaming a kiai. Squall staggered back, bringing up his blade to defend himself as he fell back into the dirt. Zell quickly pulled away once he saw who it was, and stepped back to avoid a potential strike.

"Whoa. Sorry, Squall. Didn't see ya there," he apologized, bouncing up and down in a fighting stance.

"Likewise," Squall said as he stood back up, dusting his pants off.

"Hey, big news about Selphie, huh? I didn't even know they were going out. Our little girl's all grown up now."

"She's not a little girl."

"Oh, yeah, I suppose."

Squall heaved his gunblade to his shoulder and started to walk off into the forest. Zell followed behind him as Squall knew he would. He was obviously pumped from fighting and couldn't bear to stand still.

The blond asked, "Hey, have you heard who Irvine's picking for his best man?"

"No, I only heard about it yesterday."

"Yeah, but it's coming up soon. I can't wait. I've never been to a wedding before. Have you?"

"Not that I can remember."

"I wonder who else knows about it. I don't think it'll be a big wedding, like they usually are, you know?"

Squall kept quiet, keeping himself from saying the 'W' word. He really wasn't in the mood to put up with the energetic Zell today, but he was still a good friend, so he wasn't letting his temperament snap back at him. He just used the cold shoulder technique.

"Are you doing all right?" he asked. Squall again didn't say anything, just kept scouting for a monster to fight. "I mean, I was pretty shocked when I heard about it. Really nervous and excited and kinda overwhelmed. Heh, that's probably how Selphie feels. It's kinda hard to know how to react. One side of you says 'yay!' and the other is all sad to see her go." There was a short pause where neither one of them said anything. "I wonder if they're gonna name the baby after one of us."

Squall finally couldn't take it anymore and turned to Zell. "Did you ever think about what this means for Selphie? It means she's having a baby and she's marrying Irvine. Don't you think she's kind of young for that? She just turned eighteen-" Squall caught himself before he regretted it and clammed up. He was sharing his opinion, and he had to be impartial on the matter. "Never mind."

Zell scratched behind his head. "I guess it is kinda sudden. I dunno. I never thought about it like that."

"Well, just imagine yourself in either of their shoes."

Zell looked curiously at him as Squall moved off.

"Squall, is there something you're not telling us? Rin's not pregnant, is she?"

"No," Squall sneered, "Of course not."

"You seem kinda, I don't know, weird. I'd have thought you'd have a lot to say about this."

"Well, I don't."

"You are going, right? To the wedding?"

"Of course, I am." Rinoa wouldn't have let him skip out on it, even if he wanted to. "She'd make me go if I had something else I had to do. Girls love weddings."

"Oh, man!" Zell suddenly exclaimed and slapped his forehead. "I need a date for the wedding, don't I?"

"What?" Squall had completely derailed from this train of thought.

"How stupid is it gonna look when I show up there all by myself? Everyone else is gonna be with someone. Geez, I gotta get going. See ya, Squall."

"But you don't need..." Squall gave up. It was too late anyway, as he watched Zell's animated form jump away into the mist. He sighed and headed off into the forest, frustrated by his friend's glib take on matters. Sometimes, he just couldn't tell if he was dense or just didn't like to think about serious things like that. Some people tried changing the subject to something lighter if they didn't like the current discussion. Selphie was like that too. These people were having a problem seeing this for what it really was. It was frustrating dealing with a load of people afflicted with Blind.

* * *

The cheese was finally starting to bubble, Rinoa noticed as she peered through the dimmed clear paneling of the microwave. The delicious smell also hit her, that sweet smell of cheese and baking bread. True, microwave pizzas were rubbery and a pale, pale shadow of the real thing, but she was way too tired to cook tonight. A microwave pizza was just what the doctor ordered. With their new apartment they could cook for themselves, not needing to suffer the whim of whatever the cafeteria wanted to serve. They had to buy their own food, but being able to have a choice in cuisine was much better. Squall could probably go either way, but Rinoa loved it. Self-sustenance was one of her prides, having been daughter of the Galbadia general.

Rinoa sat on the stool next to the breakfast bar to wait for the rest of the cooking time. Her feet were killing her. Shop till you drop really had a literal meaning, not just a cute rhyme. She was exhausted both physically and mentally, having rarely gotten a moment to herself all day. Now that she had, she found her mind ironically still latched to the current events. Selphie with a baby. Irvine with a baby. Both of them holding a cute little cherub wrapped up in a blanket and smiling over it. These strange images floated through her mind. What were their daily lives like now? How do you go from one minute being free and easy, and then having to plan a wedding and a baby. It must have been stressful. Was Selphie perched over a toilet with morning sickness while she was trying to pick out flowers?

She couldn't help but turn inward to herself in order to sympathize or identify. How would she deal with things if she were in the same situation? Would she get married? Would she tell Squall? Would she tell Cid? Or the others? Would she run away? Imagining herself with a full belly, walking around Garden like she had a package under her dress would be pretty shameful, she decided. Would she... would she...? She couldn't even bring herself to think the word. In Galbadia, that sort of thing was oppressively taboo. Here in Balamb, the population was a bit more liberal, so she would feel less scared about taking that option. But still... she decided that was a choice she couldn't make unless she was confronted with it. And she breathed a sigh and a prayer that she never would be.

What would her friends say? How would she even break the news? She could imagine Squall and herself walking down to the cafeteria arm in arm, happy as jaybirds, sitting down. Zell could make some comment about how the hot dog buns were never warm enough, they should put them back in the oven. Then Rinoa could make the quip that the cafeteria wasn't the only one with a bun in the oven. Then they would all stare at her, shocked. Quistis would drop her jaw open. Selphie would probably squeal with glee. Irvine and Zell? Who knows how they'd react. Well, Irvine would probably say something like 'you old dog' to Squall, nudging him in the side.

And then what? What about after? What about getting married? What about where they were going to live? Their jobs? How were they going to pay for things? Bills, doctor visits, groceries, toys, school, a place to live, and probably a hundred other things Rinoa couldn't even think of. They wouldn't be able to go out anymore. Who would they use for babysitting? How would she and Squall still maintain their relationship with a third wheel in the way? It was hard enough just now finding the time and motivation to do things together, with just the two of them, without some diplomatic invitation or Garden business getting in the way. All that nice couple stuff, that intimacy, would just float away with a child, because then they would no longer be a couple. They'd be a family.

She thought, just thought for the sake of thinking, what if she didn't tell anyone for a while. It seemed like she had just gotten Squall to warm up to her romantically, she didn't want to give him up as a father yet. That may have been selfish, but she just couldn't see Squall having a baby yet in his current state. He just wasn't 'mature' enough. Or maybe he was overly mature, she didn't quite know the right word. Either way, she just couldn't see him holding a baby, at least not at this point in time. Maybe someday. Squall seemed to be having a hard time dealing with just being around the idea of that. And talking with the girls today didn't really assuage her fears that he was regressing. She loved him so much she couldn't bear the thought of him becoming how he was when they first met again.

Squall walked in then. He looked tired and worn out, like he was carrying a camping backpack.

"Hi, hon," she chirped. "I haven't seen you all day. How was your mission?"

"It was fine." He hung up his ruffed leather jacket on the hook. Rinoa tittered at seeing his bare shoulders and white tank top. "It was just more security stuff. Nothing happened."

"You didn't mind that I called you last night, did you?"

"No." Squall sat down on the couch. "I wasn't in the middle of anything." He picked up the copy of the Balamb Gazette on the table. Truthfully, it did kind of bother him, getting interrupted by that damn PHS, even when he wasn't doing anything. But he had to have it on in case of emergencies.

"Do you want me to make you something?" Rinoa asked, gesturing to the kitchen.

"No, I'll get something later."

Rinoa bit her bottom lip. The behavior was really worrying her, but she couldn't do anything about it. She took the single-serving pizza out of the microwave and put it on a nearby plate. Licking her fingers of pizza grease, she came next to Squall, put her pizza on the coffee table and snuggled into his shoulder awkwardly as he was still holding the paper.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Needed a cuddle," she responded.

Squall was more than happy to oblige this display of cuteness. He released his grip on the paper and put his arm around her, tucking her in closer. Rinoa just needed a reminder that Squall loved her. He may not have acted like it sometimes, but he did.

Rinoa sniffed. "Were you fighting today?"

"Yeah," he said, a little embarrassed. "I'll take a shower before bed."

Rinoa giggled a little. It was nice just sitting in the crook of his strong arm, enjoying his essence while he read the paper oblivious. These were the kind of moments Squall would never understand, but it was okay, as long as he was there.

"Today was really hard," she said. "Doing a lot of thinking about Selphie and Irvine and the need to shop, trying to get as much of the shopping done in one day. It was really taxing."

"Uh-huh," Squall nodded. "Who else knows about the news?" Squall asked.

"Uh, all of us. Cid and Edea, Xu, Nida, I guess. That's all I know." Squall nodded affirmatively. Rinoa tried to keep the conversation going. "They told Cid and Edea first, and then the rest of us. Which makes sense. They didn't want any rumors to reach them first." Rinoa could only imagine how she would have told anyone she was pregnant and engaged, let alone Cid and Edea, let even more alone her father. She thought that sort of thing would have occurred to Squall and he would have said something, but he stared at his magazine wordlessly, listening but not responding. "I think everyone who needs to know, knows. And I'm sure it'll get around Garden. I don't think anyone's told Laguna or Ellone yet though." She looked up at him, no response.

She picked up her now cooled pizza off the plate and held it up to his mouth. "Pizza?"

Squall barely smiled and leaned forward, ripping a bite out of the pizza.

Rinoa looked up at Squall. "Do you wanna play some Triple Triad?"

"Sure."

"K. I'll get the decks," Rinoa freed herself from Squall and went to their room. At least he wasn't so withdrawn he didn't want to do anything with her. But still...

* * *

 _Edea, leaning on Cid's desk, picked up a pyramid paperweight, and bounced it playfully in her hands while her husband shuffled papers on his desk. The pyramid was made of some dense heavy plastic that looked like solid water. As she heaved it back and forth she looked out the wall window at the back of the office. The vast ocean covered everything from this height, broadening over the landscape like sparkling blue diamonds._

 _She turned back to Cid still filing papers. "Are you even working?"_

 _Cid smiled, "No, I was just doing this to make you think I was working." He pushed his glasses up as Edea smiled._

 _"Dear, you aren't nervous, are you?"_

 _"No, why, should I be?"_

 _"Good question," she said as she put down the pyramid and picked up a snow globe. Shaking it up and staring out the picture window she said, "I don't know why she wanted to see both of us. She called me up from the lighthouse even. It's hard to get a boat from there to here."_

 _"She knows I would certainly have contacted you with any information."_

 _"Well, I think then it has to be something extremely good or extremely bad."_

 _"You can't help but worry," Cid sighed._

 _The speakerbox clicked on with static. Xu's voice came through, "Sir, Selphie and Irvine are here."_

 _Cid pressed the talk button. "Send them in." These were mere formalities forced by the lock on the door. Selphie and Irvine were always welcome in his office._

 _The doors opened and the two came through. Selphie bounced in wearing a little yellow sundress, Irvine swaggered in typical fashion, sporting his tan suede coat and cowboy hat like usual._

 _"Hello, young SeeDs," Cid said. "How's life been?"_

 _"Can't complain," Irvine said._

 _"So what's this about big news?" Cid grinned with his hands clasped on his desk._

 _Selphie and Irvine looked at each other. "Well," Irvine said, "Do you wanna tell them or should I?"_

 _"We already talked about this." She turned to the older couple with a quick breath. "Me and Irvine are getting engaged."_

 _Edea clasped her hands together and gasped. "Oh, that's wonderful!" she yelped. She started thinking of all the elements of a great wedding she could start suggesting. It would be a great project for her. Cid sat back in his leather chair, swaying back and forth slightly, and smiled widely as if he always knew this would happen._

 _"When's the date? Or when-abouts are you planning?" Edea asked._

 _"Wait," Irvine, still grinning, said. "Also, Selphie's pregnant."_

 _Cid froze in his chair. Edea gasped and covered her mouth. Their expressions solidified as if caught in time, their eyes glossed over. Even their thoughts stopped working, like their biorhythms had skipped a beat. For a brief second they were statues. "That's..." Edea said. "That's even more wonderful." She recovered her dropped jaw and smiled broadly. "Oh... what am I saying? Of course, this is wonderful!" Edea got up off the desk and hugged both of them. "I have tons of baby stuff at the lighthouse for you to use."_

 _"Oh, we're gonna need it," Irvine laughed._

 _Cid stood as well and walked around the desk, patting his vest absent-mindedly. "I wish I had some cigars here or something."_

 _Edea took Selphie's head in her hands. "Oh, my little babies are really growing up." She held Selphie tightly, tears streaming down her face. Irvine noticed that. But Cid approached him and touched his shoulder to get his attention._

 _"Congratulations, son," he said._

 _"Thank you, sir,"_

 _"So, um, not to put a damper on this event, but what about... the mission?"_

 _"Actually, that's something I need to talk to you about too."_

 _"Good, no doubt, no doubt."_

* * *

Rinoa looked up from the article on 'I Lost My Virginity to My Foreign Language Teacher' in the magazine when Squall walked in, wearing his white undershirt and boxers. His brown hair was matted down from the shower water. Rinoa put down the uninteresting magazine on her nightstand and pulled back the covers for him. He hustled into bed, curling up under the satiny sheets and rolling over on his side immediately.

"Hey, baby."

"Hey," he responded.

Rinoa draped her lithe frame over his side, and ran her hand down his brawny arm, traveling down his smooth, tight bicep down to his forearm, and fitting her small fingers into his. The soft velvety touch of his skin ended with a harsh, jarring sandpapery patch as she ran her fingertips up to his knuckles. She grabbed his hand and pulled it towards her to look.

"Oh my god, what happened to your knuckles?" she asked. The backside of his hand was marred with round patches of clotted blood at his finger bones, like stickers taped on.

"It's nothing." Squall turned to her and pulled his hand away.

"Oh, god, that's weird," she said as she put up her hand to touch them.

"It's just a funguar bite," Squall said as he settled down into the mattress, covering himself up and turning on his side. "He jumped up and bit me in the hand."

"But we don't have funguars in the training center."

"No, it was from earlier."

"They don't have them in Esthar either."

"No, I mean outside Garden, when I was coming home from the train station."

"But I thought you took a car."

"No, I walked home. I took a shortcut through the forest."

"Oh," she sighed. "Does it hurt?"

"No, it doesn't."

"You can take a potion."

Squall turned up to her. "Look, if you're so worried about it, I'll put my gloves on," he griped angrily.

"No, no, that's all right," Rinoa acquiesced. She turned over to her nightstand. "Ready for the light?"

Squall shrugged into his pillow. "Sure."

Rinoa twisted over and pushed the button under the lampshade. Then she twisted back and put her arm over Squall's torso, spooning her body with his. The noises in the room reduced to quiet breathing. Rinoa's hot breath reflected off of Squall's back. She moved her head out of the way. Getting comfy in the pillow, trying to get settled and not irritate Squall. She couldn't help but stay worried about the scabs on his knuckles. Something seemed very unusual about them. Especially since whenever Squall was in battle, he always wore leather gloves to protect his hands when he held his gunblade, and funguar teeth would not bite hard enough to penetrate them.


	3. Day 3: Wednesday

DAY 3 - WEDNESDAY

Doctor Kadowaki pulled off the next form sheet and looked it over, sipping some hot coffee. She pushed up her glasses on her nose. The pearl attaching strings tickled her cheeks - 'idiot strings' she called them. Upon finishing the review, she put the mug on her desk, picked up her pen, and started tapping it, wondering how to diagnose this patient. Complaints of stomach problems from greasy foods, off and on diarrhea. There were a few possibilities - it could be a stomach bacteria or a gastrointestinal virus. A remote prospect, but possible. The two might have been unrelated as well, sometimes patients diagnosed themselves wrong. Or maybe it was just an intolerance to greasy foods. She wrote down on the sheet, in the space provided, that she needed to get a stool sample from that patient, wondering if she was noticing any blood in the stool.

Smiling, Rinoa came out of the washroom, holding her drying hands up. "Okay, I'm all scrubbed up," she said enthusiastically. The doctor rolled her eyes before turning, so Rinoa wouldn't see, and swiveled her chair to match her gaze.

"All right, look. You're a sorceress and the significant other of the garden commander. I agree with you that you should find a place in Garden to 'earn your keep' or whatever you call it. But I'm not going to tolerate any monkey business from you. I've been a doctor for over thirty years and I've done this job fine without a nurse and I still can. All right?"

"...Oh. All right." She lowered her arms.

"Sorry," the doctor said as she pushed up her glasses again. "I don't mean to be harsh, but I don't tolerate nonsense in my infirmary."

"I understand. I'll do my best," she said with a determined expression.

"All right, there's a student here for a physical in room one. Peto Spander," she said as she handed her a file folder. "Give him the once over like I showed you."

Rinoa confidently nodded and took the folder into the room where Peto was sitting on the bed, dangling his feet off. He had fair hair and looked to be about fifteen or sixteen, wearing a denim jacket and jeans.

"Hi, Peto, I'm Rinoa. You're here for a physical?"

"Yes," he said quietly.

"All right, can you get on the scale here?" Rinoa said, gesturing to it.

The boy hopped off the bed and approached the scale. "Should I take my shoes off?"

"Um, I'm not sure." Rinoa checked the sheet where the weight box was and saw nothing about qualifications of shoes or not. "Why don't you do it with shoes on, and I'll write it here."

The boy stepped on the scale while Rinoa wrote 'with shoes' next to 'weight'. She took down the numbers of his weight and height and then had him sit on the table again. She took the armband for the blood pressure instrument and wrapped it around his arm, just like she'd read how to do, pumping up the small bladder and keeping the stethoscope on the elbow joint. The needle remained at zero though. No matter how much she pumped, the dial remained stationary.

"Hm," Rinoa thought. It was very weird. She tried taking off the wrapper and reapplying it, going through all the motions again. She knew she wasn't forgetting anything in the process. The needle stayed at zero. She was either doing something wrong or the thing was broken.

"Doctor? Can you come in here for a second?"

Kadowaki tromped into the patient room, seeing Rinoa holding up the blood pressure instrument. "I can't seem to get this," she said.

The doctor sighed and took the bladder. "That's fine. I'll do it. Why don't you go in the second room? Fara needs some blood taken."

Rinoa nodded and headed off. She could take blood, that was no problem. She could do this job, she knew it. This was just an unlucky piece of equipment failure, she couldn't let it bring her down. She was going to show that she could fit in this job. This was really the best place of calling for her. She wasn't a SeeD, she couldn't be sent out on missions, so serving Garden as a medic was the most helpful role she could play.

Fara was sitting on the bed with her sleeve already rolled up and arm bared. "Hi, I'm Rinoa, I'm going to take some blood now."

"All right," she said. Rinoa took a rubber hose from the nearby box and tied it around Fara's arm. Then she spread a little disinfectant on the elbow joint, at the same time pressing down to find a good vein to stick the needle in. Thinking she found one, she poked in just a little ways. It was like puncturing soft rubber. This part was a little squeamish for her, but she was a big enough girl to handle it. Doctors looked at blood and guts everyday.

"Ow," Fara said as a reaction.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Rinoa looked at the syringe. It was not filling up with blood. The normal pressure should have been pushing it into the syringe. The steps she was going over told her she was doing everything right. She pulled the needle out and injected it under the skin again. Nothing was flowing in. _Where is your vein?_ she thought. She pulled the syringe out again.

"Ow," Fara said. Rinoa was concentrating so hard on getting it right she ignored the yelp of pain as she tapped the inside elbow. It should have just been flowing right in there, like Rinoa saw when Dr. Kadowaki did it earlier.

She came in right there, having heard the minor cries and becoming curious. "Jeez," she exclaimed as she rushed forward and grabbed the shot. "Be careful. Here, I'll do it." She held the syringe like a pro, pulling the plunger out slowly and extracting the blood. With no hesitation she turned back to Rinoa and pulled off the capsule from the needle.

"Be careful," she whispered as she handed her the vial. "If you inject her with air, it could cause a heart attack. Now take this to the centrifuge and run it."

"Okay," she meekly uttered. So she was 0 for 2. Not so great so far, but she could make up for it. She just hoped she didn't hurt the girl too much. When she was little she was scared of needles, as were most children, so she knew what it was like. But this centrifuge was easy. It was mechanical, no humans involved. Pretty simple. All it did was spin the vial of blood so the liquid would be separated from the solid. No problem.

She set the vial in the slot and set the digital touch pad for a hundred revolutions and hit start. The centrifugal force of the disc picked up slowly and began spinning around like a mobile. It seemed so fast. Almost too fast. Rinoa had never seen the centrifuge at this speed and began to think something had gone wrong with it. The motor inside began emitting a faint humming noise. She tried stamping the stop button rapidly, but the machine continued.

The vial of blood flew off its chamber and smashed against the blue wall, leaving a vermilion and glass supernova.

The doctor came in, as well as the two other students, upon hearing the noise. Kadowaki looked at the mess on the wall and slumped her shoulders, letting out a kind of reverse gasp. Closing her mouth she stared at Rinoa disapprovingly. The new assistant felt about two feet tall.

"Um, sorry," Rinoa sheepishly grinned.

Dr. Kadowaki remained silent, drilling her eyes into Rinoa.

Rinoa looked downward. "I think maybe I should take a break now."

"Maybe," the doctor said.

 _Like maybe a six hour break,_ Rinoa thought.

* * *

The rhapsody ended and switched to the next track of a symphonic piece as Quistis balanced herself on the highest rung to which she was going to risk climbing. Briefly confused as to how get a free hand, she decided to put the light bulb in her pocket for now as she unscrewed the small knob holding the dimmer plate in place, the shield that blocked the light bulbs from blinding her if she looked up. Delicately putting that piece on the ladder she reached up and removed the broken bulb. Just another part of her errands she was doing today.

Suddenly, a knock at the door sounded. Quistis dared not risk upsetting the delicate glass on the ladder so she just yelled, "Come in."

Squall opened the door and entered.

"Hi," she said.

He saw she was changing a light bulb on her ladder. Another man would have asked what she was doing, but there was no need for that if he could tell just by simple observation. The classical music didn't surprise him either, as he knew the intelligent woman preferred that genre. He approached her, holding a set of papers. "I was wondering if you had time to go over the SeeD test prospects now."

"Sure, just let me finish this up." Quistis picked the fresh light bulb out of her pocket and stretched out to the ceiling. "Do you know who Selphie took with her shopping?" she commented idly.

"She went shopping _again_?" Squall's eyes bulged out. Didn't they just go shopping yesterday? They were gone the whole day. "Well, she must have taken Zell, cause I haven't seen him all day."

"Yeah, she needs to get shoes, still."

Squall thought, _Oh, god, did Zell know what he was getting himself into?_ "Rinoa and Xu didn't go? You didn't go with?"

Quistis sighed. "I'm all shopped out. I spent near the whole day with her yesterday and I've got all these errands to run, you see." She indicated the grayed out bulb she held as she stepped down the ladder. "I don't think Selphie's quite ready for something like this." For a moment, Quistis regretted bringing Squall into this internal debate she was having.

 _Well, duh._ Squall kept tight-lipped with his opinions, but still thought them.

"She says she 'thinks' it's right."

"It's natural for her to feel overwhelmed or scared or excited," Squall said dryly.

"Yeah, she's definitely all of those. But she doesn't seem to be sure of herself that she's making a right decision."

 _Why is she talking to me about this?_

"She didn't have many boy experiences, you know."

"None of us have had many interpersonal relationships. Being a SeeD doesn't exactly give you time or inclination to date."

"But still, that's no excuse for being so... naïve." Quistis walked over to the garbage and tossed the bulb in. "We all told her not to get on that train with Irvine. But she did it anyway. That's how this thing started in the first place. That's where it all... began." She coughed, implying what Squall already knew. "She's been making bad decisions even before this."

"I know."

"She still thinks she's gonna be a SeeD a year after the baby."

Squall kept to himself the thought _Is she really that short-sighted?_

"She doesn't know what a baby does to your body," Quistis continued, "It really puts you on a rack. I mean, that just shows she hasn't put the right amount of thought into what she's gonna do. Me, Xu, and Rin are gonna try and confront her today."

"What would that accomplish?"

"I don't know. Sit her down, get her to realize what's really going on. She's not worried about her situation and that worries us." Her voiced raised to an alarming tone. "I think she's in some sort of denial that she's changed her life forever. She's all starry-eyed over Irvine. He's the only thing she really wants. But she doesn't realize the cost of it." Quistis realized she was getting hostile and settled herself down. "Anyway, do you want to help?"

"I'm not her father."

"I think anything we could say would have a lot more weight coming from you. You're the commander, after all."

"It's not my place to speak. I'm not her parental authority."

"She doesn't need a parent. She needs a friend. She needs her friends to help her see what's going on. What do you think we should do?"

"She made her decision and nothing can change that about the past. Nothing."

Squall spun and left Quistis' room, shutting the door behind him, leaving the blond woman a little bewildered.

She turned and collapsed the ladder. "I thought he wanted to go over the SeeD tests," she mumbled.

* * *

Xu perused Selphie's requisition forms for the upcoming Garden Festival as she walked down the hall. They had just been turned in and she was curious what Selphie had asked for this time. The girl had a nice habit of asking for fifty times more than her appropriated budget. Xu wondered if she was doing this intentionally, if she knew one of the unspoken rules of negotiation was to always ask more than what you really wanted and then come down from there. It looked like this time would be no different.

When she entered the cafeteria she bypassed the food line and went straight for the coffee machine, where not too many people were. Energetic teens didn't need coffee. She held her ceramic mug up to the spout and pulled the tiny lever down. A thin stream of brown liquid dribbled down into the mug. As her cup filled, Xu once again looked at the cartoon of a stressed-out moogle with sweat drops flying off his head. Cid had given it to her for Secretary Day.

Just as the machine had finished and she took her cup away a female voice shouted. "Xu! Over here."

Xu perked up her head and saw Rinoa and Quistis sitting at a table amidst the medium crowd. Smiling, she walked over to her friends, holding her cup precariously so as not to get burned. Whatever it was they wanted, it would be a welcome diversion from the drudgery of the day. She set her mug down on the table. "What's up?"

"Have you ever had a boyfriend?" Rinoa asked.

Xu was visibly taken aback. "That's kind of a personal question, isn't it?"

Quistis leaned into Rinoa and chided her. "Rinoa, don't ask it like that."

Xu, who was not so offended, just surprised, said, "Why?"

"Cause we're having another 'figure out Squall' session."

Xu smiled, pulled out a chair, and sat down. These led to some interesting conversations, and there was no way she was going to miss one if she could help it. "All right, so what happened?" They were also preceded by some action of Squall's.

Rinoa said, "Squall hasn't been acting like he loves me anymore."

Xu said, "Now, I know that's not true."

Rinoa didn't react and continued. "He seems more closed off than he did before. Like his personality fell off the diving board and into the deep end."

"I haven't noticed myself," Xu said as she took a sip of too-hot coffee. "But I don't spend too much time with him."

"I think maybe with the wedding coming up so quick, it's sort of scared Squall from our relationship. Do you know what I mean?"

"I think so. Like, he's not getting scared of marriage," she explained, emphasizing 'scared', "But maybe he realizes that if he stays with you, he's going to have to do the same thing. He's kinda seeing his future right now."

Quistis nodded. "Maybe he's seeing himself here."

Rinoa directed her eyes downward. "But wouldn't you think he'd be happy seeing that? Doesn't he want to marry me?"

"Oh, yeah, that is weird," Xu agreed as she sat back in the chair, a little defeated.

Quistis interjected, her hands gesturing on the table as she spoke. "Rinoa, I can't picture him not marrying you. You've changed his life so much. You are so important to him."

"Then why is he so weird? Maybe I'm not what he wants anymore. That's why he's been distancing himself from me."

"Except that he's been distancing himself from all of us," Quistis said.

"How could you tell?" Xu joked and laughed.

"Kids," Quistis cut in. "Maybe he has an aversion to kids."

"Ohhh," Rinoa sighed. "But I want kids. You're not making me feel better, Quistis," she smiled.

Xu put her hand on her chin. "I didn't think about that. That kid's gonna be in all our lives. We're all potential babysitters."

"Yeah, in a way, we're all gonna be that kid's parents," Quistis said, glowering. Selphie was going to have that kid and there was no way she could do it all alone. Being friends with her, they were now forced into helping her, helping a friend, even if they had no parenting skills or didn't want to. Because of her irresponsibility, now they were all going to get dragged down with her for it. That fact angered Quistis a great deal, that Selphie hadn't realized how this was going to affect her friends as well.

"The whole thing just seems too odd to be true," Quistis said.

Rinoa said, "Well, would you rather Selphie have it out of wedlock?"

"Does it mater? You can have a child out of wedlock. It's not so big a deal anymore."

"Except society still looks down on it."

"Yeah, but society or not, the baby is going to come. Kerboom. And there will be two people there to take care of it, whether they're married or not."

"Unless Irvine skips out."

"But Irvine would never do that," Rinoa said.

"Yeah." Both Xu and Quistis nodded solemnly in agreement. "But some people aren't so lucky."

Xu said, "I think that's what marriage is for, so two people can be cemented together, so that one can't leave."

Quistis leaned over, "Not that that stops them."

"Well, it's harder to leave, legally. Or maybe it's subconscious. You think 'we're a legal family now. I can't leave'."

"Not that Selphie's thought about that," Rinoa said.

Quistis grumbled. "Selphie hasn't thought about much." She sat up straight and alert. "Where is she going to stay? In Garden? I don't think Cid would allow that. It's not a place for kids or families."

Rinoa, ever the hopeful, said, "Maybe Cid would make an exception?"

"I doubt it," Xu confirmed Quistis' observation, "Not after Garden became a mobile command center. And certainly not after the Galbadia attack."

"I guess Selphie was talking about getting a house on Obel Lake."

"With her money? I don't think so," Quistis, ever the realist, said, "She won't be making money if she's not in SeeD. She'll be a full-time mom. Irvine will have to send them 90 of his earnings."

"That's mostly why they're getting married. If Irvine dies on field duty, the SeeD insurance will cover him nicely, since he's a high-ranked SeeD."

Xu sat back in the chair. "Everything's happening so fast, she probably hasn't had time to think about the consequences. I mean, geez, they haven't even been able to send out proper invitations, everything's just been by word of mouth. I wish she had some time to stop and think about things with a little perspective. If only she'd never gotten on that train."

"I bet she's wishing that now, too. We all warned her it was a bad idea. She really only has herself to blame. But she never really made any good decisions regarding Irvine." Quistis sighed. "She really was the most naïve of all of us. I hate to use that word, but it's true. She's lacking a lot of street smarts."

Rinoa said, "Well, she grew up in Trabia. That's not exactly a bustling metropolis. I'm surprised there's a Garden there at all."

Quistis nodded and said, "And it's not that Selphie's not intelligent. She just hasn't had time to think clearly because of the speed this is all happening at. This couldn't be a worse time. Selphie was eleven months away from becoming a veteran SeeD. She would have gotten even more benefits."

Xu commented, "No one's retired and come back to work. You lose your edge."

"And she thinks she can come back after a year. If you're not ready to handle the responsibility of babies, you're not ready to have sex. At least not unprotected sex."

Xu nearly choked on her coffee, sputtering up liquid. "That's how? It was unprotected? Nothing... uh, broke?"

"He was using the withdrawal method," Quistis said with a sneer as she shifted her eyes to her.

Xu said, "Oh my god, how stupid could you get?"

"That's why I think we need to sit down Selphie and force her into a serious talk about what she's doing. Force her to face this reality. That Irvine loves her and it's gonna be a fairy princess story. She doesn't have any proof that Irvine loved her before the baby."

"Wait," Xu interrupted, "Irvine told me that he was thinking of marrying Selphie in the summer."

Finding a place to speak, Rinoa said, "That could have been a line. When did he say that? ... After all this?"

"Yeah."

"See?" Quistis said, holding up her palm, "All Irvine is concerned with is his image. I never understood why Selphie is so interested in him."

"I kinda wondered that too," Rinoa said. "I mean he's nice and all, but I could never take his ego or his flirting."

Xu said, "Their relationship has always been sort of cool. I guess because no one thought anything would come of it, since Irvine's such a ladies man. Especially after Selphie tried to woo him and got nothing, but then they still stayed," she made quote marks with her fingers, "'friends'. I think it's a combination of things - Selphie's need to be the center of attention, Irvine's forcefulness, his suaveness. She's always been head over heels for him. We all kinda were, in a superficial way."

Rinoa said, "Maybe it's the fact that he's a project, and she thinks she can change him."

"Kind of like Squall."

"Exactly," Rinoa chirped, not minding the crack at her expense at all, in fact, agreeing with it. "All women need projects to work on. It keeps them busy. Except in her case, Selphie thinks she can domesticate him."

Xu said, "I read, though, that men can't be changed like that."

"They can't," Quistis said, "That's why Selphie's plan is stupid. She's going to end up in a relationship with someone who doesn't really care for her."

Xu was agitated at that, "Hey now. At least he's doing the right thing."

"What? Living inside a lie? Is that the right thing? The way they're going now is based on an illusion. She's not seeing the forest for the trees. I have no idea what Irvine is thinking, but I know Selphie better."

"They're both good guys."

"Sure they are," Rinoa said, trying to return to a calmer and more rational tone of voice. "But they made bad choices."

"Yeah, and they still are," Quistis said, standing up with her cup, ready to refill it at the fountain.

Xu said, "Irvine and Selphie were never official in the first place. Irvine said they were just friends with benefits for a while."

"That's Irvine for you. I can't believe they were both so stupid."

"Hey, it's not like either one of them wanted this."

Quistis rolled her eyes at Xu. "Come on. It takes two to tango. It was only physical to both of them. She was easy and he was horny!"

She covered her mouth immediately, as if she was trying to prevent the words from reaching the ears of her friends. The worser part, she realized as she took her hand down, revealing a thin mouth, was that she meant it and stood by her statement. Gripping her mug, she stormed out of the cafeteria.

* * *

Birds chirped to each other as Squall walked through the open air hallway of Garden, holding a clipboard under his arm and looking cross. Students wearing their dark blue uniforms said hello and hi as he passed them, to which he returned a polite nod. They really only distracted him. This was the last item of the day to do and he needed it signed before he could leave. He was tempted to leave it till later, but his devotion to his duty nagged at him until it got its way. The reason he'd put it off was because he needed Irvine's signature to finish it.

Squall tapped the back of the clipboard against his thigh while looking down at the purple striped walkway. He was dreading this moment. Squall hadn't talked to Irvine since he found out. He had no idea how he was going to interact with him, how he himself was going to interact. Was Irvine going to mention anything to him about it? If he was, what was he going to respond with? There was no clean way about it, no way of getting through life without ever talking to him again. Especially as commander. It was no use avoiding the problem, so Squall was going to have to take it like a man. After all the times he'd cheated death, he couldn't believe he was nervous about something like this. He took a deep breath and pushed those feelings aside. They were inappropriate.

Squall turned the corner, walked down the rows of doors, counting the numbers, when he saw a girl standing in the hallway near Irvine's door. In fact it was Irvine's door, and in fact, it was Xu, for some reason. She was looking up at his door number dolefully, hugging a stack of books to her chest with one hand and holding an envelope marked with red in the other.

Hearing his footsteps, she turned to him. "Oh, hi, Squall," she said, almost surprised. She put the envelope on her stack of books and tucked them into herself.

"Hi, Xu. Is Irvine in?"

"Ah, no, I think he's gone."

"Gone? Where is he?"

"He said he'd be back Sunday."

"Sunday?" Squall asked incredulously. "He has a wedding to plan and he's gone for three days?"

Xu just shrugged.

Squall grumbled to himself and looked away. Another fine bit of change in this never-ending saga. The document he needed signed could wait, that wasn't what he was miffed at. He was just angry that Irvine's apparent indolent attitude was showing through even to his wedding. Just like a cowboy.

Squall said, "Well, if he's gone, what are you doing here?"

"Um..." she stammered, looking down.

"Hey, Squall," Zell piped up as he approached the duo from around the corner, deciding to make it a trio. Squall and Xu turned their heads. "If you're looking for Irvine, you're not going to find him there," the blond spiky-haired man said. "He's gone for three days."

"Yeah, I know. Xu told me."

"Hi, Xu, what's up," he waved to her.

"Hi, Zell."

"Do you know where he is?" Squall asked Zell.

"Dunno. Forgot to ask. Not too far, I think."

"Doesn't he realize he has a wedding coming up soon?"

"Yeah, but he's got some time. It's not like it's a huge gala celebration. Besides, the girls do all the planning anyway."

Xu looked back and forth between the two, caught in the middle, and kept her books held tightly like a schoolgirl.

Squall tilted his head to change his perspective. "Why does your tattoo look different?" The black tribal pattern that was normally black on skin tone had a distinctive red hue change.

Zell held his hand to face and turned away. "Oh, eh, huh. I tried asking one of the cashiers at the store out when I was with Selphie. I got my just desserts for it, I guess."

"Maybe she thought you were the groom and were asking her in front of your fiancée."

"Aw, man!" Zell snapped his fingers in a maudlin manner. Apparently, he was still on his quest to find a date for the wedding. "You're probably right. Jeez, what was I thinking? Should I go back there and try again?" he asked the two of them.

"Mm, no," Squall thought after no deliberation. "Maybe you should try someone new. Someone closer to home."

"Yeah, you're right," Zell kicked the floor glumly like a football player. Even despondent, he still had that bouncy energy. Squall rolled his eyes. Xu smiled and looked down at the floor. Zell continued, "You know, I was thinking. It's never gonna be the same with them. Selphie and Irvine, I mean. You were right about that too. They're not gonna be the same people we knew."

Xu said, "People don't change personalities drastically just cause they're in a relationship... or marriage."

"Ha, ha, yeah right." Zell held his stomach and doubled over. Squall couldn't tell whether the gesture was sarcasm or not. "You shoulda been there with me today. All Selphie talked about was Irvine. Irvine's gonna do this, he's gonna do that. He's gonna get this career. The kids are gonna go to this school. Before, she didn't know what she was gonna have for lunch until 11:59." Zell cleared his throat a bit.

Squall looked away. Apparently, Selphie was very stubborn about this relationship and the path she was going. She really did think she was going to be able to achieve all these goals she had set out for her and her family, and for some reason Squall was angry at her that she trying to be so controlling. But he kept his mouth shut, and didn't say anything.

Xu said, "I don't think Irvine's gonna change that much."

"Yeah, but the way we see them is gonna change. I mean, we're never gonna see the two of them alone again. Selphie's never gonna be without Irvine and Irvine's never gonna be without Selphie. It's like they're one, one unit. They're different people when they're alone. Before, me and Irvine could hang out and do guy things, but now it'll be different."

"What-" Squall caught himself again.

Xu said, "Maybe you'll still do that stuff, maybe you just won't be able to do it that often."

"Nah," Zell waved his hand dismissively, "Anyone I've ever known who went into a serious relationship just became someone else. They started hanging out with that girl 24/7. Lost a lot of good training partners that way. We'll probably never see Irvine again. Or at least we'll never see him the same way. He's got Selphie now."

"I know," Xu said quietly.

"But at least Selphie found someone she loves and Irvine's going through with it. He could easily back out or use the mission or SeeD as an excuse or something."

"I know," Xu said. "Excuse me." Xu walked quickly in between them and down the remainder of the hall. Both the guys thought the behavior was odd.

"Whoa, that was weird," Zell said.

Squall said nothing.


	4. Day 4: Thursday

DAY 4 - THURSDAY

Squall was using his break to nap on the couch, or at least rest himself, with Angelo below him. This was, of course, ruined by his girlfriend's entrance. She was playfully holding a box of kitchen knives. Squall twisted around sleepily from his position on the couch.

"What do we have knives for?" he half-mumbled.

"It's a wedding gift, silly."

"What do we need knives for? Oh." Rinoa's response didn't register in his head faster than his mouth could output. He was still half-asleep.

"I was thinking we could split it."

Squall raised his eyebrow.

"How much was it?"

"4,000 gil."

Squall was mildly offset. He hadn't agreed to get a wedding gift. And he hadn't agreed to give this gift. In fact, Rinoa hadn't talked about this with him at all. But he realized he actually hadn't thought of getting a gift at all and realized that he should have. Plus, he hated shopping. And this was more convenient.

"Come on, tightwad," Rinoa chided, watching the wheels in Squall's head turn.

"All right, that's fine." Strategically, and for the sake of convenience, he decided to go along with it. Part of being a leader was choosing your battles. Although he wouldn't have picked knives as a wedding present, he really didn't have any other ideas. Selphie and Irvine were going to need a lot more than that in their future life. Knives were going to be a luxury. They needed more basic things like tables, places to sit, baby stuff. Babies were especially expensive, and added to the normal cost of living.

Squall shook off the fatigue and got off the couch, moving to the kitchen counter to look at the box for his pseudo-approval. "Didn't you get knives for some other wedding present one time?"

"Sure, it's my favorite present to give. Everyone needs knives when they're just starting out." Squall had karmic visions of six boxes of knives as presents for their wedding. "Plus, I got it 30 off."

"I wouldn't put that on the card."

"Oh, the card," Rinoa lightly slapped her hand on the table. "I forgot. Shoot, do you want to help me get that one this weekend?"

Squall, of course, didn't want to. He hated shopping in the first place, and he needed a rest from this flurry of activity happening around the Garden that seemed to be localized in his group of friends. But Rinoa would want to spend time with him this weekend anyway.

"All right," he said nonchalantly as he went back to the couch and laid down, picking up a newspaper on the coffee table.

"Good, we need to pick up wrapping paper too." She took the box of knives and set them in an out of the way place in the kitchen. "So me and Selphie were talking about how you guys are gonna catch the garter."

Squall's eyes popped open. _Oh, god, I forgot about that. Oh no._

Rinoa continued, "So we were thinking how just about none of you are gonna go for it. Since there's only gonna be four or five unmarried guys there and how all the girls are gonna practically be falling over themselves to get it." She laughed to herself. "We're all gonna be getting in shape," she said, flexing her arms.

"Uh-huh."

"Are you even listening to me?" she whined.

"Yes."

Rinoa tapped her fingers on the counter where Squall couldn't see, nor cared to, thinking of what to do. She haughtily walked over to the couch and pulled down the paper from his eyes. "Squall, what's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong," he said straightly.

"You have been tight-lipped since I told you about what was happening."

Squall remained tight-lipped and said nothing.

Rinoa continued, "It's like you've reverted back to your old self."

"I just have nothing to say."

"Wrong, you've got plenty to say. I know you do. But you don't say it. That's the problem. You're upset about this, I know you are. I know that your injury didn't come from a funguar." She pointed to his hands.

"It's from a funguar. I was there. And I'm not upset."

"Then what is your opinion?"

"I have no opinion."

"The hell you don't. Everyone has an opinion. What is it?"

"I have none."

"Tell me, I wanna hear it."

"I have no opinion."

"Tell me."

"I have no opinion," he said, a little sterner, not losing his temper. "I have nothing to say, because I have no opinion."

Rinoa was starting to feel like she was talking to a brick Squall. She stood up and crossed her arms. "You have something to say, Squall. I wish you would say it."

"I have nothing to say. It's not my place to make a judgment."

They stared at each other for a few seconds, a stare that meant a stalemate, neither of them budging from their positions, but not backing down either. That thing about judgment had just clued Rinoa in more, and she was too stubborn not to find out what it was.

Squall, however, used a different tactic. He put his newspaper back on the coffee table and stood up. "I've got some work I need to do." His break apparently over, he exited the apartment, though Rinoa knew he would be back in time for dinner.

With the clanging of the door, Rinoa had the incredible urge to pout, but what would be the point when there was no one there to hear her. She sat down at the kitchen counter and stared up at the calendar near the door, looking at the last two weeks. She couldn't even sigh. She felt empty, the feeling you get from not winning an argument, but no closure from losing it either. No resolution about whether you were right or wrong. She was frustrated, and even starting to feel sorry for her own gossiping. Maybe she was just making a mountain out of a molehill, and it wasn't doing anything but making Squall mad at her. Maybe she should just write it off as Squall being Squall.

Suddenly, the phone rang. Rinoa jerked her head towards it, and walked the steps into the living room to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"Hello. This is Cyan Aldridge with the Balamb Train Station."

"Uh-huh."

"Uh, this is regarding this bill for the train car we received on Tuesday. We were hoping we could arrange a payment now."

"Payment?" Rinoa asked. She thought SeeDs already had a contract with the train stations about payments and such. She figured that sort of thing would be arranged through Garden. "I think you might have the wrong number. You might want Garden accounting."

"Ah..." Rinoa could hear papers being shuffled over the phone. "This is the number that was on the reparation form. I was told this is a separate bill regarding the damages received."

"Damages received?" What was she talking about? "What sort of damages?"

"Um, it says here the occupant's car, the SeeD cabin, had the bed mattresses and frames broken. The wall panel was crushed, with wiring ripped out in some areas. Some upholstery damage to the couch, couch cushions. And planter being destroyed."

 _WHAT?_ "What caused that?" Rinoa suppressed her urge to shout and scream into the receiver.

"It... doesn't say. Just that occupant was willing to pay for all damages, and to use this number to call him to arrange payment."

Rinoa bit her lip. "Um, I think you'll have to call back later. He's not here right now."

"All right. When would the best time be to call back?"

"In the evening," Rinoa said as she suppressed hyperventilating.

"Okay, thank you."

"Thanks."

"Bye."

Rinoa placed the phone on the receiver.

That couldn't have been Squall. It couldn't have. Broken beds? Crushed wall paneling? It sounded more like a caterchipillar had gotten loose in the room, than her boyfriend. She didn't want to believe it, but there wasn't a shred of evidence that didn't point to him. Squall was on a train Monday night, Tuesday morning. He would have been in the SeeD cabin. He would have given them his private phone number to prevent Garden hearing about this, to keep his indiscretion quiet. So they wouldn't see that he had... what had he done? What in the world was going on?

* * *

Xu typed delicately, but fast, on her computer, tabulating the monthly budgeting, paying particular attention to the Garden Festival. Secretarial duties for the headmaster included administrative leave, personnel archives, communication skills, and mostly financial records. Gil for Garden was stretched tighter than a rubber band, with money needing to be allocated for school supplies, the garage, even the food budget was skimpy. Xu hoped that Selphie could make do with a lot of streamers.

Zell's body rose from the floor in the elevator. Xu peeked out her eyes from her computer, then went back to filing until he came up to his desk. "Afternoon, Zell," she said cheerfully. "Do you have an appointment with Cid?"

Zell embarrassedly put his hand behind his head and scratched. "Uh, no, actually, I came to see you." He stared down at the floor. "See, the other day, when you and me and Squall were talking at the door. I thought, I don't know. I hope you weren't mad at me."

Xu stifled a laugh, "Of course I wasn't mad at you. Why would I be?"

"Well, I know, but was there was just something about the way you reacted when I was talking about Irvine and how they're gonna be different now, and I thought about it and thought about it and I slept on it. And, well, I just wanted to make sure we're cool."

Xu nodded and decided something resolutely. Zell was a good friend, he deserved better than just saying everything was all right. And besides, this might help her purge some of her feelings. She pushed out of her chair, stood up, walked around her desk, transferring from secretary mode to friend mode. She leaned up against it and sighed, hugging herself with her arms. "This news hit everyone pretty hard, didn't it?"

"Yeah, kind of a bombshell."

"No one had any idea this was happening."

"Yeah, not even Irvine. He was just being his usual flirty self."

"Yeah, he was charming. Or is, still." Xu didn't want to talk about him like he was dead. "When Selphie wasn't around... or sometimes when she was around and they weren't so... together... Irvine would come down to hang with us girls - me, Quistis, and Rinoa. There were a lot of times we'd stay up late, just talking. We all had a lot of good heart-to-hearts, shared a lot. It was fun. He was like one of us." She sighed. "I don't know. Sometimes, I thought we were closer to him than Selphie."

"So you were getting close to Irvine?"

"I thought so. I don't think that Irvine wants to marry Selphie, he's just sort of settling, cause it's the right thing to do. Otherwise, it wouldn't have been so off and on, don't you think?"

"Well, I don't know." Zell had the mind of a fighter, not a lover. "There's a lot I don't know about relationships."

"But I guess we'll never know now." Xu turned and went back to her desk. She pulled out a drawer and took an envelope out. Breathing deeply, she held it up to Zell. The word 'IRVINE' was written on it in red marker.

"See this? I was going to put this under Irvine's door, since he was gone, but you and Squall were there, so I couldn't." Xu thought briefly about the next thing she was going to say. "It's a love confession, I just felt like I had to get it all out of my system." Zell snapped his head back in reaction. "Now I'm really glad you guys were there. It prevented me from doing something really stupid. So, thanks."

"You're welcome," Zell was more confused then ever, but he was still a little proud of doing something nice. He was clearly taken aback though. He had no idea Xu had those kind of feelings for Irvine. But the more he thought about it, Irvine did have that sort of charm that drew the ladies to him. That kind of charm Zell wished he could get in the store. It was no wonder that one of them would fall for him as a result. "I had no idea that you liked him... in that way."

"Nobody really did, except for Quistis and Rinoa," Xu continued. "The more I thought about it yesterday, the more I realized that it wouldn't have worked anyway. It was just a stupid schoolgirl thing, just one last chance to try and tell him how I really feel, but that's all gone now. The last thing he needs is one more burden. I think I'm going to miss the friendship we had more."

"Yeah, me too. I guess this is affecting us all, in all different ways. I didn't realize how important this was to all of us."

"Well, I sorta did, but now it's out in the open. It's going to be hard on all of us when they walk down that aisle."

"Yeah," Zell scratched the back of his head again. "Say, do you have a date for the wedding?"

"Um, I'm actually going with Nida." Xu had already heard of Zell's quest to get a date, including the cashier incident, and hated to decline him.

"Oh," Zell said as he swallowed nervously.

"Yeah, he's also doing some photography and he needs a van to carry his stuff around in."

"Oh, okay."

"Don't worry, Zell, you'll get a date," she said as she chucked him on the shoulder.

"Yeah, I hope so."

* * *

These forms of Selphie's were getting to be a hassle. Squall swore that she filled them out incorrectly just to get him to talk with her, so he had to try and pry out the information he needed to have. The sloppy handwriting wasn't helping either. Plus, waiting till the last minute to send them in. Plus, having to correct her mistakes. Plus, knowing she would just make them all over again in the future when she forgot.

Squall headed for the quad, where he knew she would be, setting up for the Garden Festival. It seemed like she was in a perpetual state of setting up the Garden Festival, trying to make each year bigger and better than before, locked in a Sisyphusian state of the same activity for all time.

It looked like she had gotten a few more helpers this time too, as Squall shuffled down the stairs. A few students were painting pieces of wood covered in white spackled drop cloths. A skeletal stage was set under a large metal and wood scaffolding that stretched to the ceiling. Squall craned his neck up and saw Selphie's yellow dress hanging off the edge, where she was lying on her back painting something.

"Selphie!" Squall shouted alarmingly. "Get down from there!"

Selphie nearly fell off the platform as she peered over the side where an angry Squall was watching her. She put her brush down and climbed down the piping, jumping the last step.

"It's not safe up there," Squall said before Selphie had fully approached him. "You have to have more sense than that."

"I was fine," she dismissed. "I was careful climbing."

Squall flashed back to when she tumbled down a hill on their first SeeD mission, trying to deliver a message. _Yeah, I bet you were._

Squall chose not to pursue arguing and stuck to matters at hand. He held up the 8 1/2 by 11s in his hand. "There's a problem on your requisition forms for the festival. You can't use the dormitory hallway as a refreshment area."

"Why not?"

"Because that's a fire hazard. And there's going to be people in the dorms who want to get back and forth without being blocked."

"Well, why aren't they coming to the festival? Everyone should come to Garden Festival," she quipped merrily.

"Not everyone should come to Garden Festival. Not everyone wants to come to Garden Festival," Squall said dryly. "Also, you cannot use the Star Room."

"What? But that's where we were going to have the costume ball."

"That room is going to be under renovation for the new infirmary by the time festival gets started. It was on the allocation sheet for this year."

"But, Squall, it's a costume ball. We've never had one. Don't you think it would be so cool? Jerry thought of it. We have to have one this year. I was gonna dress up as a tonberry."

"Not unless you find another room."

Selphie sighed and drooped down, rolling her eyes. "Fine, oh well, we'll do it next year."

"You're not going to be here next year."

"What? Of course I will."

"Next year you're going to have a child, remember?"

"I'll still be able to do some things."

"And Garden Festival is not one of them. Because only people in Garden get to have a Garden Festival, and you're not going to be here."

"I can still do things just fine with a child. Other people can. I could do it part-time."

"Part-time? SeeD is not a part-time job." Squall nearly dropped his papers as he flung his arm out in anger. "You're mom now. You're that and nothing else. Your career as a SeeD is over. All that work you ever did was for nothing. You can't be a SeeD when you've got a baby to take care of. You now have a full-time dedication to this baby and if you think that you'll be able to come back to SeeD after that then you're not thinking very well. You are responsible for that thing."

"Are you saying you're not going to let me come back to SeeD?"

"It's not in Garden's best interest to let you back. Every SeeD here is expected to be sharpened to a razor's edge at all times in case they get called for duty. Exactly how are you going to do that when you're pregnant? Or even after? Would you send a mother out into the Centra Ruins?"

"I think that's a little unfair."

"I don't care. Rules are rules. You messed up, not me."

Squall was beginning to grow red in the face. He was not yelling, but those in the sound of his voice slowed action to a standstill to eavesdrop as Squall lashed out. As far as the commander was concerned his universe only contained himself and her now. Selphie was like a candle in a dark room to Squall.

"You have to take the consequences for your actions. And not only did you take yourself out from the roster, but Irvine along with you. What kind of father is he going to be if he's a mercenary? Having to go off at long periods on a moment's notice. Risking his life repeatedly. Personally, I think he should quit SeeD too, but unfortunately, there is no rule stating you can't be a SeeD and a father at the same time."

There was no rule because no one ever had been a SeeD and father at the same time. SeeDs were too young for planned marriages and children and their careers were foremost on their minds. Squall hadn't thought of it before, but he wasn't just losing one good SeeD, he was losing two.

"You just had to have your little fling with him so you could ensnare him and keep him forever. That's why you let him have his way with you. Now you're stuck with him forever. You will never be without him and you will never be without his child. Don't act like you're a victim, you could have used birth control. And god knows why you didn't when you were doing what you were doing. Instead you just succumbed to your carnal desires." Squall was starting to say things that the back of his mind told him he'd regret later. His rationality started to poke through and Squall turned around to leave before he said anything else improper, but he looked back at her over his shoulder. "Of all the people in the world I thought you two would be smarter than that."

Selphie stood locked in place, staring at the back of his body. For one of the few times in her life, she was speechless.


	5. Day 5: Friday

DAY 5 - FRIDAY

"...The most reprehensible behavior I've ever seen out of you for a long time. Out of any SeeD, even. Displaying absolutely no sense of tact, discretion, prudence, insight. Instead showing completely unprofessional behavior, unbecoming of a young SeeD such as yourself. Unthinking of the feelings of others, crass, rude, not to mention risking the respect of your peers, while destroying that of Selphie's."

Cid paced furious back and forth and around his desk, occasionally using the wooden obstacle to slam his hands down or bend over it, gripping it like eagle talons.

"Well? What do you have to say for yourself?" he exclaimed with no pausing breath.

Squall remained stoic, straight like a rod, gazing ahead stiffly like a lion. "I... apologize for my actions, sir. The act was done without thought or provocation. There is no excuse for it. It will not happen again." This was a military school and he was going to act military.

Cid looked at Squall's face, tilting back and forth like he was examining it or waiting for something. Squall thought he might have been looking for remorse in his expression, some sign of emotion. Squall had none to give. Cid finally took a cathartic breath and sat down behind his desk. He pressed his fingertips together, rocked back, and brushed away some of the wavy brown bangs that had fallen in front of his eyes.

"Squall, do you know why I selected you as Garden Commander?"

 _Great, another rant._ Squall chose to keep all the answers he was thinking of to himself and only responded with, "No, sir."

Cid grumbled at the formality of his response. "It was because you were ready for it."

 _And I've always resented you for that. I was only eighteen years old. That was way too much responsibility for me to handle. You have no idea how stressed out I was. You put me through hell and I didn't even know why._

Cid continued, "Garden was starting to become divided among itself. With NORG splitting our own students and faculty against each other, we needed a unifying force. Someone for the students to look up to, to bond with. And that same person would need strategic command decision-making skills. The attack by Galbadia Garden was just the catalyst. There had to be..."

Squall drifted off as Cid continued haranguing about his purpose in his position. He was no stranger to being disciplined, but the headmaster was the only person he answered to now. He had already heard it before, mostly from himself. His sense of duty as a commander, that's what prompted him to lose it in the first place. There was no part of his life not ruled by his duty to Garden. This chewing out was just part of that. A formality to tell him he'd done wrong. Meaningless.

Cid finished. There was a pause as Squall waited for the next response from his headmaster. Something was expected. Cid continued, "Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I did it too soon, maybe I did it at too young an age." He shook his head solemnly.

 _If you're going to say something, just say it._

"Do you have anything further for your defense?" Cid said.

"No, sir." _I know he wants me to say something more. Quit playing these mind games with me._

"Then you are dismissed... Commander."

Squall spun on his heel and exited.

* * *

Zell peeked in and found an empty classroom. Excellent. He quickly headed to one of the many empty desks and powered on the computer. It started up with a faint hum, which faded away. As soon as the initial program load completed he cracked his knuckles and accessed the Garden Network Boards. Navigating through menus he thought to himself how perfect this plan was. Zell was gonna get himself a date, even if he had to knock on every door in the city.

With the message board loaded, he headed over to the 'lovetastic forum', sponsored by the city of Balamb. Here he could find a match. The self-description indicated thousands of singles in his area had already met and thousands more were waiting. Zell certainly couldn't pass up an opportunity like that. Especially with a free membership awaiting him. He clicked on the prominent offer and was sent to a form to fill in.

He started by filling in the basics of his profile: name, age, height, eye color, hair color, all the boring stuff. Gender? 'Yes, please', he entered in the box with a smile. Then he put a finger to his lips and thought about it. Something about that seemed wrong, not as funny as when other people said it. He backspaced it out and typed 'male'. The selection for weight had a few options, ranging from 'slender' to 'large'. Zell thought for a second. He was pretty trim in the belly, but his arms were fully muscled. There was no option for 'buff', so he picked 'thick', figuring it was close enough.

Then there were a few more questions about education and employment. There was no selection for mercenary, nothing even close, so he checked off 'hospitality/travel'. There were also several checkboxes for living status. He thought about all the people in Garden and checked off 'alone', since he was in his own room, 'with kids' since there were underclassmen, 'with parents', since Matron was Cid's wife, and Cid lived here, 'with roommates', since his former roommates were still living here, 'family and friends visit often', since they did, and 'there is a party every night', since they were constantly graduating new SeeDs, plus other fun extracurricular activities.

The next section was a long list of political and religious choices. Since Zell didn't care much for either, he just skipped all that. Since he wanted a good selection, he chose to search for matches within 250 miles, with photos or not, in an age range of 17 to 39, and began clicking 'any' for eye color, hair color, weight, etc.

Finally, came the step he wanted - the descriptions and essay portion. Despite what he thought about the SeeD tests he had taken in the past, this was the part where he was going to really shine and get that date.

The first thing he wrote was, 'I am loking for date in 10 days to my friend's weddin.' He decided to get straight to the point right away. He thought for a second about his opening line and remembered one of the tips he'd read was to be as honest and specific as possible. He continued, 'who got pregnent by another friend and they are getting hitched quickly.' Now he needed a little something about himself personally. 'I'm into martial arts, metalorgy, and tatoos.' Zell thought and laughed a bit as he realized just how much those things don't go together. Oh, well. Just part of his eclectic personality, he guessed.

This needed something more though. All he had so far were two lines. Girls wanted a guy with substance. 'My friends think I'm a 'rich boy', but I think I've got a big heart, I like helping ppl. Im n outgoing guy, kind, honest, I luv the outdoors and fighting, and mountain skiing.' Zell added that last part as an afterthought. He had never mountain skied before, but he was sort of interested in it and someday he might. Besides, someone who liked mountain skiing would probably be his sort of girl. 'Im not really sur what kinda girl I like, so if u r interested, let me know what ur hobbys r. My job involves some travel, so DONT GET WORRIED IF I DON'T RESPOND TO U RIGHT AWAY' The extra caps would emphasize that well, so no one would run off and get another date too soon. Time was of the essence here. 'Please respond A.S.A.P. Maybe this'll turn into a wedding of our own. ;)' Good ending line. He finished it with '-Zell Dincht'. And hit the submit button.

Not too bad, he thought. Zell was all set to go to another page, but surprisingly, there was one more section before the ad would be set - uploading a photo. No problem. There had to be one in his personal directory. Most of them were of his friends doing stupid stuff, not of him. But there was one tiny one with him giving a thumbs up to the camera on his tattoo side. Yeah, that would be awesome. He selected that file and uploaded it. It was an awesome tattoo, no reason not to show it off. It would show the girlies what kind of fun loving guy he was. Plus it showed off his 'million-dollar' smile, as his ma said. Now the ad was complete. He hit the 'finish' button and the screen showed a confirmation message. All he would need to do now, with that awesome personal ad, was wait for the honeys to come in.

In the meantime, Zell decided to check what was going on at the Garden Center Message Boards, codenamed 'Garden Square'. The General topic always had some interesting threads to scour for the casual reader. Underclassmen liked to use the boards for 'what's your favorite...' and other jibber-jabber. Zell's friends rarely posted anymore, but the fun, 'say-anything' nature of the forum kept him coming back. Although these days it was less often than he liked. Man, when was the last time one of his friends posted? He scrolled down the list to see an unread thread started by Irvine's ID six months ago about gun-cleaning tips. The last responder was Quistis. Selphie had been on a mission then, and was going out with the gunslinger. Curious, since threads had a nasty, but interesting habit of derailing into off-topic personal conversations, he clicked on it and started reading at the latest message.

* * *

 _The obnoxious sounds of zipping backpacks and coats rustling that started even before class ended finally petered out as students filtered away. Two students remained at a desk, talking and possibly checking out the Garden message boards on their computer terminal. A few remaining Trepies stood around the door, conversing with themselves, and basking in the awe of their favorite teacher. Quistis paid them no mind. The more attention she gave the Trepies, the more they followed her around. All she could do was tolerate them, and besides, since she was reinstated as a teacher, she had more work on her hands than she could keep track of. This fifteen minute interval between classes was just what she needed to do a quick check on the grade progress._

 _Her slender fingers whittled along the keyboard to access her grading program. When it finished starting up she tabbed over to the classes she wanted to check. Peering through the obnoxious glare of the overhead fluorescent lights, she analyzed the numbers of the last assignment she gave. Everyone did about average on it, not too good, not too bad. She'd always believed that it was the fault of the teacher when the student failed, but since the events of a year ago, she started believing that she just couldn't save everyone. But there was no reason, if both parties put forth effort, that a student couldn't succeed. In fact, everyone in her classes was doing pretty well. Grades were starting to climb up out of the first term slump. Quistis attributed that to the fact she was putting her all into teaching this time. She was just so happy it was finally showing through._

 _When time compression was over, and things had settled down, Squall had reinstated her, making her not only a teacher again, but leader of the academics committee, overriding Cid's initial orders. Strangely, the headmaster made no arguments about it this time. Maybe her performance inspired his confidence again in her abilities. Maybe it inspired her own confidence. Maybe it was just the shortage of teachers for the incoming students._

 _She never really knew if teaching was her calling, given her lackluster results over the years. But if it wasn't teaching, she didn't know what else it was. When it was good, she loved teaching, and she loved being a SeeD. Both were part of who she was, both were her responsibility, and she signed up for both. So, she tried her hardest at being the best she could._

 _A white window suddenly appeared on her screen. A second later it faded in to a dual boxed message, from Rinoa. She forgot she was signed into the Garden instant message program, because no one ever messaged her during school hours. Gradually, her slow computer processed the information and displayed Rinoa's message on the screen._

 _"OMG, guess what," she said._

 _Quistis looked quizzically at the screen for a moment, wondering what could be so exciting for Rinoa to interrupt her at work, and waiting to see if she would type in any new information. When she didn't, Quistis asked her "What?"_

 _"Selphie slept over at Irvine's last night."_

 _"What?" she responded, genuinely stunned. She stared motionlessly at the screen. This came out of nowhere. Selphie and Irvine had spent the night? She had no idea they were becoming so serious so quickly. She typed in "How do you know this?" She wasn't suspicious of Rinoa, but Garden, like most schools, was bent on rumor-mongering._

 _While she waited for a response, she realized she hadn't seen Selphie that morning, but that wasn't too unusual. It's not like they were joined at the hip, they were just roommates. She had her teaching stuff, and Selphie had her own life, usually she had a lot of extracurricular activities to take care of._

 _Rinoa typed "Squall told me."_

 _And then, "Irvine came to the door wearing the same thing he had on last night, and then he said something about how Selphie doesn't like breakfast and quick shut his mouth."_

 _And then, "So I figured it out."_

 _That was true, Selphie didn't like breakfast very much. So then it was probably true. Quistis asked, "Does that mean they're going out?"_

 _"I don't know."_

 _"Do you know if they," Quistis stopped, trying to find the right words without being rude, "Did anything?" Quistis was worried about Selphie moving too fast, hoping she wasn't being coerced by Irvine._

 _"I have no idea," she said, and then a moment later. "Don't you think it's cute though?"_

 _"Yeah, cute," Quistis wrote back, "Fast, but cute."_

 _"What, are you not happy?" Rinoa said. Apparently, she had a bit of the matchmaker in her, but Quistis never believed she or anyone else needed a significant other to validate her existence._

 _"No, I am," Quistis said, only a moderate lie. "I just never expected it from Selphie." She sent the message and then thought a bit more about it. The saving grace of the instant message program was that it gave you a chance to think about what you were going to say before you said it. "I'm just really surprised, that's all."_

 _"Yeah, new boyfriends are always exciting."_

 _New? Try first. For all she knew, this was Selphie's first romantic relationship. Selphie was as focused on developing her career as Quistis was, despite her devotion to the underclassmen. Then all of the sudden, Irvine comes into the picture, and starts distracting her. She didn't want to see her stop developing her life just for the sake of a relationship. If it turned out bad, she would be way behind if she was waiting for him. The only person in life you could count on was yourself._

 _Three students came into the classroom, talking loudly amongst themselves, and took their seats. The next class's students slowly started trickling in. Quistis quickly wrote to Rinoa, "Gotta go, class is starting."_

 _"Ok, talk to you later."_

 _Quistis signed off the program so she wouldn't get interrupted, and brought up today's lessons. She was still distracted by her concern for Selphie. It was going to be difficult to muddle through this one._

* * *

There was something about working on machines that made a woman feel aggressive, powerful. Maybe it was because they were such big pieces of mechanical equipment with such muscle and potency. And she was the key to making them all run smoothly. Maybe it was the satisfying feeling of working with one's hands. Rinoa looked down at her thin gloves, worn down to cracked leather and striped with grease. She smiled, knowing that these hands were capable of doing so much good and they were doing good right now.

She laid her back on the wheelboard and scooted under the car. Adjusting her cap, under which her jet black hair was neatly piled up, she grabbed a wrench and started unscrewing a set of hex nuts. The affirmative feeling of strength glowed in her veins like liquid gold. This giant vehicle was above her and she was manipulating it to her will, making it better. She was so happy she unconsciously started singing a little song to herself while she cranked the wrench.

"The hex nut's connected to the - lug bolt. The lug bolt's connected to the - carburetor. The carburetor's connected to the - ...thingy. The thingy's conn-"

The pipe she was working on burst open, spilling cups of oil onto her chest. Rinoa shrieked in surprise and averted her head as she spit out droplets of greasy bitter oil from her mouth, squinting her eyes shut. She tried reversing the hex nut she was loosening to stop the gush of oil, but it was having no effect and the liquid was just making her hand slip. Frantically, she grabbed the rag in her pocket and held it up to the hole. This slowed the oil leak enough for her to shove the towel in further, plugging it up. Still spitting out the vile matter on her tongue, she looked up at the busted pipe and wondered if anyone would notice.

"Hey, Rinoa? Are you here?" Zell's voice echoed in the garage.

Rinoa, daintily adjusting the rag one last time, slid out from under the car and lifted herself up. "Hi, Zell. What's up?"

"Ah, not much. Working in the garage now?"

"Yeah, I decided to give it a try. Seemed like a pretty cool job, I mean."

"Yeah, you really have to know your stuff too. I had a mechanics class in here for a semester. It was really fun, but the supervisor sure likes a quality job. No rag-tag hacks, you know?"

"Uh, yeah," Rinoa said, subconsciously covering a part of the underside of the car with her leg. "So what's on your mind?"

"I, uh," Zell reached behind his head and scratched. "I was on the Garden Square today. You know, the message boards."

Rinoa nodded.

"And I was going down the archive, just for reading. And I found some things about what Irvine said about Selphie back when they were going out. He was talking to Quistis and Xu about... not wanting a relationship with her."

"How long ago was this?"

"Uh, about six months."

"Hmm, maybe he changed his mind about that though."

"Yeah, maybe." Zell looked down at the ground and rubbed his head. Rinoa suppressed a giggle. Zell always wore his heart on his sleeve, he just never realized it.

"Zell, what's really bothering you?"

"Well, I'm worried that this isn't what Irvine wants, you know?" Rinoa nodded as he continued. "Like he's just settling."

"Well, Irvine said he was thinking of marrying her in July also. And that he was gonna wait until he came back from the mission."

"Oh, really?" Zell said brightly.

"Yeah, although the other girls and I thought that could've been a line."

"Oh, yeah. Could be." Zell slumped his shoulders, dejected. "I'm confused about what to think about all this. Irvine's real concerned about his image."

"Yes, he is," Rinoa heartfully agreed.

"There was also a post that said he didn't want her coming to Deling City with him. Cause he was afraid of what might happen. This was after they," he made quote marks with his fingers "'broke up'."

Rinoa nodded and leaned against the car. "I remember. He said he didn't want to get into something before he left. And Quistis and Xu both said it was a bad idea to Selphie too."

"So I don't know why he agreed to it."

"I know why."

"Why? Oh." Zell rolled his eyes at his own ignorance. "Man, I can see why you hate men."

Rinoa laughed. "We don't hate men, we just don't like it when men use us." Rinoa then realized this was coming from his attempts to get a quick date.

Zell said, "I feel like I've been lied to."

"We've all been lied to about this. Or at least the truth has been fudged. I mean, people just see what they want to see. And then they tell that to us, and we believe them. If you're really worried about Irvine, why don't you talk to him when he gets back?"

"I wouldn't know what to say. I don't want to make him angry."

Rinoa understood Zell. People mistook him for being childish because he was so child-like, but that didn't mean he didn't have an adult mind. "Don't worry, Zell. We've all got some reservations about what's going on, but we really can't do anything about it but be there for our friends."

"Yeah, all right. Thanks."

"Anytime, Zell." Rinoa picked up her wrench off the car hood as Zell turned to exit. "By the way," she said, "Do you know anything about cars?"

Zell's eyes lit up. "Cars?"

* * *

"And this is the engine center of Garden," Squall waved his arm to the labyrinth of clockwork gears and sprockets caught in a mish-mash that he wouldn't dare attempt to even try and understand. "This is what enables us to detach from the ground foundation and become a mobile command center."

The two gentlemen from Fisherman's Horizon, clad in ratty grease-stained clothing, stepped forward in the murky underdwellings and gazed over the railing at the iron and copper workings.

"Aw, yeah, this looks like good work from our end."

"I heard Coburn worked on this. Too bad he couldn't come."

"Excellent work on the cog ramps. Excellent."

Squall looked back and forth behind him. He couldn't imagine what sort of monsters were hanging around down here in the bowels of Garden.

Squall continued, "And, um, over here is the steering mechanism that the mechanics at FH constructed for us. When we first learned Garden was mobile we were in a bit of an emergency situation. And since it hadn't been used in so long, all the gears that controlled steering were rusted out, since mobility was only meant as an escape route. But now it uses a simple galleon-pinion apparatus so all direction changing is controlled by one simple pilot-stick at the top floor."

"Awesome."

"Ah, yeah, that looks like Harrah's work. I'd recognize it anywhere. See? He even put that smiley face on that gear over there."

"Hah, you're right. That's his signature."

Squall gritted his teeth. Indulging clients' whims of fancy was something he hated. This was not some sort of museum to show off. It was nothing to be gawked at by yokels. When pitching to clients about the hiring of SeeDs, this sort of 'booze-and-shmooze' bull was far from his forte. The representatives from Fisherman's Horizon had wanted to contract some students out for the rebuilding of Horizon Bridge on the Galbadia side, and in coming to Garden, wanted to see their city's handiwork in it. This was the least important part of Garden, in his opinion. The mobility system hadn't been used for very long, since it was expensive and bulky to uproot the military school every time there was an incident. Better to send out a small operation team. The only silver lining was that he did enjoy talking about Garden. This was his home, and he would defend it to the death. In fact, he had, on several occasions.

"Anyway," Squall said, "If this is all you wanted to see down here, I'd like to move back upstairs so we could discuss the mission specs."

"Oh, we can talk about that down here. I want to get a closer look at this work."

"Okay, fine," Squall grumbled through his molars.

"Yeah, I think it's pretty cut and dried," the second one said, "Thirty SeeDs for thirty days. Half of them as guards, half as construction."

"Actually, about that. I don't really know if you can expect much from SeeDs construction-wise. We aren't really trained in that area unless it's for a specific purpose, such as a long-term undercover mission."

"Yes, yes," he waved his hand, "That's fine."

"You can expect them to serve in a support capacity if you really need extra men down there."

"All right, that's fine."

"Yeah, that sounds good," said the other one.

Squall rolled his eyes and tagged after them. They skipped from station to station as if they were inspecting the electricity and plumbing. "Also, there's one more thing," he said, trying to get their attention, "We'd like to use this mission as a SeeD test. It's a field exam for potential graduates."

"Potentials?" the first one jerked his head away from the banister. "We don't want any potentials, we only want highly-trained SeeDs."

Thirty full-fledged SeeDs for a month of construction work and guarding? What a waste of resources. Was this guy trying to dump his bank account?

"I can assure you that everyone in the SeeD program is completely trained in all facets of being a SeeD before being considered for graduation. This field exam is meant to test those aspects, like teamwork, physical ability, composure, focus, decision-making. And there will be plenty of regular SeeDs on hand at all times."

"Well," he looked at his partner. "I guess that's all right."

The second one piped up, "But we want one of you from that group that saved us from time compression on the squad."

"Yeah."

The six of them (five if you didn't count Rinoa who wasn't a SeeD) were considered by the rest of the world to be the finest warriors in the land, since they were the ones who saved the world from Ultimecia. They were highly-skilled, but it wasn't like they were gods. None of them were on any missions that he knew of, so they theoretically could do it. This sort of catering to clients, giving them the world just to make them happy, was really grinding his gears now. Especially to these two hicks who didn't know how the system worked.

One clucked his tongue, "Yeah, we want what's-his-name... Irvine."

"The one with the gun."

"Yeah, he sure made an impact on us down at the depot."

Squall said, "Yes, he is prone to do that." This mission seemed like something viable to send Irvine on, similar to the one Squall was just on in Esthar. Irvine wasn't on any business usually, especially during the time span of this mission, he'd be well done with all the wedding stuff by then. And he could keep out of trouble, since he would be away from anything major.

"I think that'll be fine," Squall agreed. "Let me just confirm his availability." Squall picked up his PHS from his pocket and dialed Xu's desk. She picked up almost immediately.

"Balamb Garden, how may I direct your call?"

"Hey, it's Squall."

"Oh, hi." She returned to familiar demeanor instead of overly business-friendly. "Where are you?"

"I'm in the basement. Can you do me a favor? Can you check Irvine's mission avail for next month and then three months after?"

"Okay... Wait, the next month? He's booked."

"How about a month before?"

"He's booked." Xu's voice had a slight intonation to it that said this was something he should have already known.

"He's booked then, too? What in the world is he doing that takes so long?"

"Don't you remember? Irvine's being transferred overseas for a mission for a year and a half."

Flashes of light entered Squall's brain. "What! Why didn't anyone tell me about this?" Squall walked away from the gawking eyes of the two clients he suddenly noticed.

"I thought you knew. Everyone knew. It was common knowledge. That's why he's getting married so fast."

"I thought it was for insurance." Squall had a thousand thoughts racing through his mind at this point.

"Well, that's part of it."

"Why? Where is he getting shipped?"

"The Island Closest to Hell."

Squall nearly crushed the phone in his right hand as his left found its way to his gunblade handle.

" ... Squall? ... Squall?"


	6. Day 6: Saturday

DAY 6 - SATURDAY

"This is the most ludicrous action I've ever heard of. I can't believe you allowed this to happen." Squall angrily threw out his arm as if he were clearing out the air.

Cid remained composed, sitting at his desk and holding out his palm. "Squall, calm down."

"Irvine is about to have a child. You can't send him away on a suicide mission! There's a reason it's called the 'Island Closest to Hell'."

"Squall, if you read the mission report, you'd see that it requires special skills that only Irvine can provide. He's the best of the best SeeDs we've got to offer."

Squall already knew the report. He had read it back and forth innumerable times, searching for a loophole, something to get Irvine out of it, something where they could send someone else. Irvine was to act as scout and sniper for a science team going to the dreaded island to put up radio towers.

Cid said, "The towers would allow entire continents to be able to communicate with each other again, just as when radio was in use. Now that Sorceress Adel is out of orbit and no longer interfering with radio communication, we can finally have global contact again. And the Island Closest to Hell is the best hub for intercontinental communication. Of course, you know the conditions surrounding that island as well as I do. Which is why the best of the best need to go there and protect that team. Irvine's job is to prevent frontal assaults before they happen. If a monster got through..."

"You can't give it to another sniper? Not even one from another Garden?"

"Irvine's the best sharpshooter there is. In the world. You know that as well as I do. I can't let him off. I can't reassign a different person to his position. And I can't make him quit. In fact, per the contract, he couldn't quit even if he wanted to."

"And he doesn't want to? Bullshit."

Cid ignored his cussing and continued. "The only way he could get out of it is to be dishonorably discharged and banned from SeeD forever."

 _I'd call what he already did pretty fucking dishonorable._

"That would mean throwing his entire life away. Irvine, Selphie, and I have already discussed this at length and we all came to the same mutual decision about what to do. Irvine accepted the mission before he... became engaged."

Then he knew. He knew. He knew he was getting shipped off in a few weeks and he still went and did what he did, with full carnal knowledge.

"We discussed the ramifications of what this meant for him before and after. After he completes this mission, Irvine will have more money for his family, of which he has none. He spent the last of it on Selphie's engagement ring."

Squall didn't know that. The way Selphie was talking and spending money on the wedding, he'd have thought they had enough money to at least get by. A bit of his anger subsided.

"I'm afraid this is simply a matter of unfortunate circumstances in unfortunate times."

Squall had so much to say, but Cid didn't want to hear it. He wanted to say Irvine and Selphie were making a mistake, that the SeeD contract needed to be ripped up regardless, that he was afraid Irvine wasn't going to be coming back, and even if he did, he would be jumping into fatherhood right away, six months after the baby was born, having missed the most crucial moments of its development. And Squall couldn't believe he was the only one who could see something wrong with that, that something needed to be done about it. Yet everyone was throwing up their hands at it all, afraid of getting dirty.

Squall said, "I saved the world from time compression. We saved the world. And yet I still can't make a difference in it."

"Irvine made his own choices. We can't do anything about that. I don't believe any further discussion will yield the results you want. Good day, Squall."

Cid picked up an ink pen and lowered his head to write on a document. Squall stared at him, wondering if Cid felt anything about this, or if he had seen so many missions that protocol was more important than the people he had built this Garden for, and Cid was telling him that was the lesson he should learn from this.

Cid looked up from his paper, knowing Squall was still there. "Dismissed, Commander Leonhart!"

Squall snapped to attention, saluted, and walked out.

* * *

Rinoa knocked on Dr. Kadowaki's door. The aging doctor looked up from her desk to see the black-haired girl cutely leaning forward in her doorway.

"Hi, doctor," she said meekly.

"Hello, Rinoa. How are you?" A sudden look of panic. "You're not here to try assisting me again, are you?"

"No, no. I decided not to pursue that line of work. I'm still trying to find my place in Garden, actually. Did you ever get that stain off the wall?" Rinoa asked sweetly, referring to the centrifuge incident.

Dr. Kadowaki turned to the wall in question and pointed. A framed poster of abstract art was hanging there.

"Oh."

"So, what brings you here today?" the doctor said in her professional medical demeanor.

"I was wondering about, um, Squall. He has some cuts on his knuckles, and I was wondering if he came in here for treatment."

"No, never heard if he did. But Squall doesn't always come down here for injuries, much as he should. What did it look like?"

"He said it was from a bite from a funguar."

"Uh-huh."

"And he always uses his gloves to hold his gunblade."

"Uh-huh."

"And, um, I got a call from the Balamb train station about somebody... wrecking the SeeD cabin car... on Monday," she breathed out. Rinoa swished her head back and forth, looking at the floor.

Dr. Kadowaki raised her eyebrow in curiosity. "These cuts. What did they look like?"

"Like blotches, they were thick and rough."

"Do you think they had that curved shape that a bite mark would have or from punching something."

"Punching," she mumbled.

"Uh-huh." Dr. Kadowaki put down her pen and clasped her hands together, looking right at Rinoa. "Tell me more about this cabin car thing."

"Um," Rinoa grabbed hold of her arm and let forth a shaky breath like she was holding back sobs. "I got a call a few days ago from the Balamb train station. They were calling about payment because the 'occupant' broke some of the beds, crushed the wall, the couch, um, some other stuff. But, but they never said that it was Squall. But it was on Monday, after I told him about Selphie and Irvine. And then they said that the phone number was what the occupant gave him... so..."

"I see."

"Would... would Squall do something like that?"

"Perhaps. I've noticed Squall's behavior sometimes when he is angry, he'll take it out on something else, like going to the training center, or punching a wall."

"Or wrecking a room?"

Dr. Kadowaki sighed and took off her glasses. "Perhaps. This incident happened on Monday right?"

Rinoa nodded.

"Well, I don't want to make any guesses, but it certainly seems likely. We all have different ways of coping with something, and this is Squall's way. No, it's not the healthiest way, but it works for someone like him. But in times of extreme emotion, someone taking out their anger on something else supersedes their ability to feel pain. They no longer care about their own well-being, just about getting the emotions out. They need to tire themselves out so their emotions fade out too. What Squall's doing is not about feeling pain, it's about control. People who do that have events or situations in their life that they just can't control. They feel helpless. They can't control their situation, they can't control their rage, but they can control the pain, and they can control themselves. At least that's one theory about why. You haven't noticed any incidents with others? Has he ever raised his hand to strike you?"

She shook her head. "Oh, god," Rinoa exclaimed as she thought of the possibilities. Her eyes became watery.

Dr. Kadowaki held out her hand to relax her. "Calm down. It's okay. I'm sure Squall is not that sort of person. I'm sure that this is just a reaction to the news about Selphie and Irvine. I heard about his blow-up. He might be lashing out. He has a strong, uncomfortable feeling that he can't find a name for. That's why he's been so destructive."

"What should I do?"

"Are these wounds fresh?"

"The only time I saw them was Tuesday."

"If it continues, get him to see me."

"No, I mean, what should _I_ do?"

The doctor understood her mistake and reneged. "Oh, well..." She wasn't a psychologist, so she wasn't quite sure what to say.

"I mean," Rinoa said, "This is really different. Usually, if he's mad, he'll just punch the wall or something, or go to the training center. He won't destroy a room."

"Well, if he starts to lose his temper to that severity again, just get out of the room. I'm sure you know how to handle yourself."

"Is he psychotic? Does he want to kill somebody?"

"No. He's just trying to get some release. This is very unusual behavior for him, and if it were any other circumstances, I'd be worried, but this is a rather unusual situation. Its full of emotions. And if I know Squall, he's just not able to handle them yet. Just try and be there for him. Get him to face his problems. Let out his feelings. Just be there for him, encourage him to talk. You're the best thing in his life right now."

Rinoa nodded. She wasn't sure how she was going to deal with the taciturn Squall, but she had a little more information now and that kept her calm.

"Thank you, doctor."

"Anytime."

* * *

Zell bounded into the library, purpose furrowing his brow. Standing in the entryway, he cracked his knuckles under his fighting gloves. His hair was styled, his teeth were polished. The flirting tips he had found on the web had all been thoroughly memorized. He just had to remember to be confident. _All right, let's make some magic,_ he thought, putting himself in stud mode.

Zell passed through the doorway. The library was rife with young ladies traipsing between bookcases, whispering in the corner, and studying at chairs. Some were in loose-fitting casual clothes, temperate for the season, others were in SeeD uniforms, looking very formal and professional. It seemed like a smorgasbord to Zell. How could he lose with so much variety?

"All right, which one of these lucky ladies gets a date with the Zellmeister," he whispered to himself, strengthening his resolve.

He strolled up to the library checkout girl. She was a thin, small teenager with short cropped yellow hair and oval-shaped eyes. Her skin was speckled with a few sun-induced beauty marks, but she had a pert smile and nice breasts. Zell propped his beefy arm on the counter as she bent down to put some books in a box.

She stood up and faced him, "Can I help you?"

"You can and will," he said glibly, flashing a toothy smile.

"Uh, do you need to check something out?"

"Are you available for check-out?"

The girl burst out laughing, doubling over, holding her side. She gripped onto the ridge of the counter to steady herself, then gave up and collapsed behind the desk, having hysterics. This was not the reaction Zell was looking for, as he watched her double up and spasm for nearly a minute, not sure what to do next. He was still waiting for an answer.

The girl took some short breaths, wiped the tears from her eyes, and composed herself. "Um, yeah, sorry, I've already been checked out. In fact, I'm a lost item."

"Oh," Zell said dejectedly. He guessed she was trying to say she was taken. He remembered his confidence and his tips. If they said no, it was their loss. "Your loss, baby," he scoffed and left the checkout counter.

Okay, that approach didn't work. No problem. He had a treasure trove of strategies to try. He scanned the panorama for a good successful candidate, listing them off in his head. Too old. Too young. Too mannish. Ick. Not sure if that one's a human or a Shumi.

Then he spotted a nice one at a reading table in the commons area, darting her eyes between her notebook and textbook. She had long brown hair and matching doe eyes. She looked very studious, not someone who could get through life on looks. Of course, that sort of person would not be hanging out in the library anyway. This time he would try for something more personal, to open with a tried-and-tested line, at least according to the website author.

"Hello," he said, trying for a pleasant tone. She immediately looked up. "You look like you're waiting for someone."

"I am!" she gleefully exclaimed. "I'm waiting for my study group. How did you know?"

Zell was about to say 'well, here I am' before she piped up. Now he was thrown off-kilter that she actually was waiting for someone. He had to just go with it, improvise at this point. "Well, um, er, I'm sick- uh, psychic. Do you study here a lot?"

"Every week. We study for Mr. Aki's math test. He gives a test every week, you know."

"Oh, yeah, I had that class," Zell said with genuine enthusiasm, momentarily forgetting his mission. He pulled out a chair and sat down, tired of leaning on it. "If it wasn't for study groups, we wouldn't have made it."

"Yeah, we were thinking of making it like a formal thing. Like if we could have a math tutoring room and students could come in and get help from upperclassmen."

"Hey, that's a good idea. Or like a night class, or-"

"Hey, Jen!"

The girl looked up and behind Zell at the blonde waving at her from the doorway.

She continued, "We're meeting in the Quad today. Didn't you get the memo?"

"Oh, shoot, I didn't check my mail." She scampered over her books, sliding them in her backpack and ran out, passing by Zell like he wasn't even there. Remembering her manners, she turned back and waved, "It was nice talking to you."

Zell waved back and smiled. Oh, shoot, he forgot. He was trying to pick her up. He got so wound up in the math class. Oh, well, couldn't dwell on that now. He was on a roll, and he was losing momentum by just sitting there. Next he tried diving into the bookcase.

A girl with glasses was in the G-J aisle, perusing the titles at a leisurely pace. She was in no particular hurry, just looking for the book number written on her piece of scratch paper. Thinking she found it, she grabbed by the spine and pulled it out. Zell's large face appeared behind the book, grinning madly. "Hi!"

"Eek!" she said as she jumped back into the other bookshelf.

"Are you checking that one out?" She said nothing as Zell filled in the void with rapid conversation, looking straight into her eyes. "That's a good one. It's hard to find too. I had to wait six months on the waiting list before I got it. I heard they bought more copies because there was so much demand for it."

"Uh-huh." She slowly took up her book and went towards the end of the aisle as Zell followed her parallel.

"That author used to be a Timber Maniacs writer until he got big. He traveled a lot on the Centra continent looking for ruins and such.

"Uh-huh," she said as she walked faster towards the checkout counter, clutching her book to her chest.

"Me and my friends went down to Centra one time when we found Garden was mobile and we found this huge old tower that was full of tonberries. You ever see a tonberry? No, probably not. Well, maybe in a book. They look kinda cute at first, but, man, do they ever pack a wallop when they get close. They kinda remind me of turtles without shells."

She stopped 'uh-huh'-ing and concentrated on the girl checking out her book as he kept on. "Cactuars are sorta the same way. I think he wrote a little about cactuars in that book, which is pretty rare, because they're so skittish, once you see one, it's usually gone. The only place I know where they are is on this island that's kinda east of Centra, where it's all desert, cause you know cactuars are desert creatures, obviously."

Having been checked out, she made a beeline for the door, almost running, while Zell held up his hand to her. "Yeah, he writes some good stuff in there. He... ok, see you later," he called to her as he stopped short of the doorway. That one had potential. He turned back into the library's main area.

He saw Xu happened to be in the library too, and was practically running up to him, gripping a book with her fingertips. "Zell, what are you doing?" she said in a harsh loud whisper.

"I'm trying to get some points for the Zellmeister," he explained confidently. "I'm just getting warmed up now, but I'll start racking up the ladies in no time."

"Zell, I don't think the library is the best place to pick up women."

"How come?"

 _Because they're smart,_ Xu thought, but there was no way she could say that nicely. "Well, people who come in here aren't looking for a date, they're looking to study. Their minds aren't into a real social state."

"Ohhh, I see." Man, he was never gonna find a date in time for the wedding.

"Whatever happened to the girl with pigtails? The one who gave us the mega-phoenix in Balamb."

"Oh, she moved to Galbadia Garden."

"Oh, sad."

"Yeah, and I still haven't gotten any responses to my online personal yet either."

Xu hated to cut down Zell's prospects. He meant so well, and his heart was in the right place, just his exuberance outweighed his good judgment and social skills.

"Come on," she said, "I'll buy you a hot dog."

"Really? All right!" he said as he pumped a fist in the air, much too loud for the library. At least he wasn't getting out of this empty-handed. If he couldn't have a girlfriend, he'd take a pity hot dog.

* * *

"Hey, Selphie."

Selphie turned around and found one of her female students and Garden Festival workers accosting her. Always eager to answer questions, she closed the gap. "What's up?"

"The festival stage construction. That shipment of mahogany wood we wanted is on back order, so we won't have it before the festival."

"Ha! At this point we'll have to chop down the trees ourselves," she joked. "Well, that's no problem, we can get another shipment of wood that they do have. And by then we can put everyone on its construction."

"Yep, exactly," the student agreed. "So, I'm wondering what wood we should get. I think the two best candidates are oak or cherry wood."

"Hmm, oak's traditional, but cherry looks so much more refined and cool."

"But it's more expensive."

"Maybe I can get some money scrounged up from donation. I think I know some friends in Timber who might be able to..."

Quistis, from behind the corner of the hallway out of Selphie's range, watched and listened to the exchange from her vantage point, drowning in a lake of worry.

Okay, she thought to herself, breathing deeply. _Why am I so nervous? I'm a teacher, I shouldn't be this nervous, I don't get this way. Why am I nervous? Because it feels like I'm betraying a friend. More accurately, I'm stabbing her in the back. But I can't live a lie, I can't pretend to be something I'm not._ Those morals superceded her own emotions, their truism was larger than that. _I've got do this for my own peace of mind._

Selphie's and the student's tones of voice were indicating they were ending their conversation. They said goodbye to each other and Selphie started walking down the hall toward her. Now was her chance. Quistis turned the corner and walked up to Selphie.

"Oh, hi, Quisty," she started.

"Selphie, I need to talk to you."

"Okay."

"This is really hard for me to say... but I can't be the maid of honor at your wedding. I just can't support this decision. You're making it too fast."

Selphie's eyes widened. "But, Quisty, you can't just quit like that, not with only a week..."

"I'm sure one of the other girls will want to do it. Here," she took Selphie's hand and put the wedding ring that was entrusted to her back in her palm. "I'm sorry, I just couldn't stand up there with you and defend your decision to marry Irvine. Not like this."

"Well, I guess I can't make you be my maid of honor if you don't want. Bummer." She dropped her hand, enclosed around the ring.

"I just don't think you realize what you are doing. You seem so 'not ready for this'. Like, so unhappy."

"I am happy. I've just been kinda... overwhelmed."

"Do you think it's right to be doing this?" Quistis was asking her as an individual, without any prejudice or influences of others. "So fast? You're getting married so fast after just finding out."

"I think it's right." Her tone of voice made it hard to distinguish if she was confident with her thought.

"Selphie? Quistis? What's going on?" Rinoa walked down the hall and ran into the two of them. Each of them looked like they were about to cry.

Quistis said, "I just told Selphie I couldn't be her maid of honor at her wedding because I don't think what she's doing is right. Or at least it's not something I can go along with."

Rinoa shrugged. "Quistis does have a point. We all have some misgivings about it. Not just you, but Irvine too."

"What about Irvine?" Selphie said, "Irvine's very happy, he's positively glowing. Didn't you see him before he went to training? Didn't you see him when we told you?"

Rinoa said, "I think he's more concerned about what other people think of him."

Quistis said, "With this, he'll never be the same."

"You'll never be the same," Rinoa added. "And your decision making hasn't been exactly straight."

"How do you think you're going to come back to SeeD after the baby? After a year? Nobody's come back after six months. And who's going to take care of it? Pay for it? You can't ask Garden to do these things."

Selphie's eyes kept on the floor the whole time. "I'm sure I'll think of something. Look, I've got some things to do. I've got to finish some event planning before Irvine comes back. Bye, guys." She grabbed her stuff and stepped in between them to go down the center of the hall. She wasn't hurrying, she just left as if she had been in friendly conversation and run out of time.

"I didn't mean to make it into an interrogation," Quistis said. "Lord knows she's already had that from Squall. I mean, I meant to do it later, to sit her down. It just came out. I wish I didn't have to do that."

"She needed it," Rinoa said, squeezing her arm reassuringly.

"Yeah, but we shouldn't have been the ones to tell her. I mean, it's hard enough for her as it is. We can't possibly know what she's going through."


	7. Day 7: Sunday

DAY 7 - SUNDAY

 _Amazing,_ Squall thought, _they showed up. They got together shortly after time compression, then fell apart, sort of, and now this._

The Garden Commander could barely stand to watch the two. They had been holding hands and making goo-goo eyes at each other since he'd come in. He was half-expecting them to jump on top of the table and start going at it. He was glad he hadn't been waiting long. Perhaps, more accurately, he was glad he had been strategically late, so that everyone would already be in there and the meeting could start immediately.

"Morning, Squall," Quistis said. She was something like Squall's second in command in matters related to Garden, since she was leader of the education committee, and that was such a large part of Garden.

"Morning," Squall nodded lazily and set his coffee and documents down on the table. "Nice to see everyone here," he said as he leaned back in his chair, looking around the room at all of Garden's leaders, mostly consisting of his friends and a few other teachers & faculty who rarely said much during these meetings. He had Selphie and Irvine's full attention, but he knew they were holding hands under the table. "Let's get started." He pulled out his top sheet from the folder and held it up. "First thing is... the fire cavern will be closed a week from today for the next few weeks while we let the monsters respawn. Quistis, can you let the students know this? Especially the ones close to their SeeD test?"

"Can do."

"All right. And-" Squall caught Selphie and Irvine staring straight at him. It was weird, like their gazes were synchronized. It disconcerted him. "And the new infirmary wing construction date is set for the fifteenth. So," Squall put down his notes, "Anything new?"

"The Garden Festival budget was cut. Again," Selphie piped up. There was no hesitation in her voice. It was like running Garden Festival was her one purpose in life.

Squall said, "The festival budget gets cut every year. You'd think you'd be used to it by now."

"This time we can barely do anything. We can't afford the band we want, we have to use cheap wood for the stage, the food is gonna be a little more than cocktail weenies and crackers."

The half-asleep blond fighter became alert. "Cocktail weenies?"

"Calm down, Zell."

Squall said, "Sorry, Selphie, but we need that gil for more pressing issues - like room and board and maintaining the training centers."

"All work and no play makes SeeDs go crazy," she pouted.

"Selphie has a point there," Irvine said. That really caught Squall off-guard. Irvine had never said anything like that before. He'd always supported Squall's points, that work and study came first and play later. Everyone in the room knew it too. It just added more artificiality to the room, to their relationship. Even the way he said it sounded synthetic, like he was just saying it to please Selphie.

"I'll see what I can squeeze out of the budget," Squall said after a pregnant pause. "I'll take it up with Cid. How much do you need?"

"We need enough for the band. We don't need the wood stage, do we?" Selphie looked at Irvine as if they were picking out curtains. "Oh, but I wanted a costume contest. I think the band can do just fine on the floor."

"Maybe we can get some sort of platform for them to stand on," Irvine said.

"Yeah, I'd rather have a costume contest than a band, wouldn't you?"

"Well, that depends on what costume you wear."

Selphie playfully hit Irvine, "Oh, you."

Everyone in the room was frozen, watching this exchange. They hadn't seen anything like it for months. It was like time was wiped clean and started over, without anything happening in-between.

"Anything else?" Squall said, jarring the group back to business.

"The yearly Triple Triad tournament is coming up," Quistis said.

"Right, right," everyone muttered. It was a popular event in Garden, and of course, Quistis the card queen would be the first to mention it.

Quistis said, "I'm thinking three leagues for this year, for novice, amateur, and pro."

"Sounds good."

"I'll make sure some flyers get printed up," Selphie said. "I'll just need the info."

"Oh... sure."

Apparently, Quistis was feeling the awkwardness too. It shouldn't have struck anyone as such though, Selphie was the chairman of the events committee.

Zell leaned forward, ready to speak. He was head of the library committee, a position he accepted in order to get closer to the pig-tailed library girl. When she moved, he became sort of stuck there. "They're going to be moving the computer servers down to a lower level to make some room. So they might be down for like, a half an hour next Monday. Also, some of the others wanted to me to say there were reports of a man hitting on students in the library. Not sure what that was all about, probably just an isolated incident that won't happen again."

"All right." Squall couldn't stop looking at Selphie and Irvine. They were in their own little world and Squall was watching from a little window. It was like watching a car wreck you couldn't turn away from. He was waiting for something to happen, something explosive. "Does anyone have anything else?"

No one did, apparently.

"All right, meeting adjourned." Squall picked up his papers, as did most everyone else who had them. Others, like Mr. Aki, left to go to their dorms or homes or wherever. But Quistis, Zell, Selphie, Irvine, and himself always went down to the cafeteria, where Rinoa would be waiting for him. Then the real weekly meeting would start.

Squall led the charge, as he was oft to do, his folder neatly tucked under his arm. Usually, the others would chatter behind him, talking about something funny that happened during the meeting. Today, it was dead silence. The five of them crowded into the elevator and hit the button for the first floor. The quiet was as uncomfortable as being so close to each other, hearing only the hum of the motor. Squall noticed Irvine and Selphie were still holding hands, they had apparently been sewn together there now.

The doors opened and the five poured out and walked down the short platform of stairs. When they got to the point where they would turn right, Selphie and Irvine broke away from the group.

"Me and Selphie have some planning to do," Irvine broke the silence. "So we can't join you this time, sorry."

There was no one who didn't definitely think this was a weird time to mention it, at the last second. Squall frowned slightly, not sure if he was disappointed or relieved.

"Okay, we'll see you later," Zell jovially said. Both he and Quistis gave a short wave goodbye. The remaining three circled Garden's central fountain. Once they were out of earshot, Zell said, "Was it just me or was that the most awkward meeting ever?"

"Oh, yeah," Quistis agreed. "It was also the shortest meeting ever."

"Hey, yeah, interesting. Maybe we should have more awkward moments like that. Maybe Xu and Mr. Aki could get married."

Quistis laughed as they entered the cafeteria and spotted Rinoa at a circular table, already holding a steaming cup, Angelo happily panting by her side. Squall waved, letting her know they saw her and approached the cafeteria counter. "The usual," he told the lady. She quickly got a tray of three cups and a donut ready for them. While he waited, all Squall could think about was seeing them together, then realized it was the first time he had seen them acting like a couple in a few months, since they went on their 'cold period'. He just couldn't stop staring at them. It was too weird, like they were trying to convince people that they were really in love, overcompensating like an old, wrinkled woman with too much make-up on.

"All set," the lunch lady said. Squall took the tray and brought it over to the table with Rinoa.

"No Irvine or Selphie today?" his girlfriend asked as Squall set out the cups.

"They had other plans," Squall said. He took his paper cup and sipped the warm, bitter liquid. "You have mine, Quistis," he said with a grimace. They switched cups as Zell drank his orange juice and munched his donut.

"What plans?"

Quistis said, "They went somewhere to plan more of the wedding. It was weird at the meeting. We've seen them as separate people for so long, seeing them together is so unusual."

"Yeah," Zell said, "Like artificial. Not that it was bad, just different."

Squall noticed that the initial shock of Selphie and Irvine together, getting married, and having a baby was now wearing off, and people were becoming accustomed to the idea, as if it were a normal happenstance. People were adapting to the news and reacting accordingly, not overly happy or sad, but it was business as usual.

"Yeah, now I'm sort of excited to see them get married," Rinoa said, "It's kind of a new adventure."

"Irvine definitely seems affectionate towards Selphie, I noticed."

"Or maybe it's just part of his natural charm," Rinoa said.

"Right, 'charm'. Where 'charm' equals 'dorkiness'," Zell laughed.

"Oh, you," Quistis lightly punched him on the arm and laughed as well. She said, "I'm going to miss the times he just wanted to come over and hang out. When he watched TV with us. He didn't mind any of our chick flicks."

"You just like being flirted with," Rinoa smiled.

"Can't say I minded it, it's nice to be wanted."

"All the ladies in Balamb are gonna be disappointed," Zell said between bites of donut.

"Remember how Irvine always tipped his hat to a lady when he passed? That was so cute."

"Yeah," Rinoa agreed.

"Geez, was everyone in love with Irvine?" Squall muttered loudly. "You'd think the world's most eligible bachelor just got off the market."

"Well, he was pretty charming," Rinoa said. "Girls love that sort of thing."

 _Yeah, and some love it too much._

"Uh-oh, I think Squall's getting jealous," Zell said.

Squall gulped down the rest of his coffee. "Whatever. I've got work to do." He left the table with a dark expression.

* * *

 _The next page in the book was the end of the chapter. That always held a relieving sense of accomplishment for Quistis whenever she read, one of the simple pleasures in life. Although this volume on the history of Centra was interesting enough to keep her going, it was always nice to have a small mile marker._

 _Once again, Selphie passed by the kitchen. This time going to the sink and filling up a vase with water. They were roommates currently, for six months while some dorm construction was going on. They had separate bedrooms on separate sides of the dorm, but shared a living room and kitchen._

 _She made a little squeal as she passed by the breakfast bar where Quistis was perched on a stool reading._

 _"Tonight's the night?" Quistis put forth._

 _"Yep. Gonna get Irvine one way or the other."_

 _Quistis rolled her eyes. They had been casually seeing each other for a month or two now, emphasis on casual, because in the last two or three weeks, Irvine had been sleeping over a lot more. Quistis didn't really care, she wasn't offended, it was what dating couples did. She didn't know if they were doing anything in there, and it wasn't her business anyway. Irvine had said to her that he didn't want a commitment right now, and Selphie said she understood that. Apparently she was finding a way to overcome that now._

 _"Can I borrow your Jaybirds CD?" she asked._

 _"Yeah, it's on my tower," Quistis replied._

 _Selphie entered her roommate's room on the other side of the dorm while Quistis returned to her book. Five minutes later, Selphie called out, "I can't find it."_

 _Quistis, mildly irritated, put down her book, splayed out to keep her place and went into her room. Selphie was looking up and down her black CD tower. Quistis, knowing where it was, took it from its top position and handed it to her. Selphie smiled her thanks._

 _"Do you really think this will work?" Quistis said as Selphie eagerly walked past her out of the room._

 _"I've got everything. I've got candles, music, hot oil, Winhill champagne. This is going to be the perfect night, I know it."_

 _"I don't know. If you're trying to make Irvine fall for you this way..."_

 _"I'm not trying to make him fall for me. I just want this to be a special night. I really wanna go out with him. I want to make it official."_

 _Quistis followed her to her room and took a peek inside. Long-stem candles were arranged around the now clean room to give a dim atmosphere once the lights were turned off. A bouquet of roses was sitting at the windowsill above the head of the bed. Quistis was just surprised the bed was made, a first for her. A bottle of massage oil was sitting next to the boom box Selphie was putting the CD into. Quiet, ambient, easy listening music began to play._

 _"Guess you went to a lot of effort for this," Quistis commented._

 _"He's the first guy I liked since I started training for SeeD. That was like, three years ago."_

 _Quistis agreed that was a long time. She couldn't remember the last time she went on a date herself, she was always busy with studying and teaching._

 _"You still think it's a bad idea?" Selphie asked._

 _"It's just that I know guys like Irvine and, not that I'm saying anything bad about him, but they flirt with girls all the time, but just aren't mature enough to have one. They think they can get away with casual dating. It doesn't mean as much to them as it does to a girl. They don't really think about the other person's feelings." Selphie didn't respond as she arranged her stuffed animals. Quistis gave up and left the room to go back to her book._

 _Just as she passed by, a knock sounded at the door. She opened it and found Zell standing there with a big tub of ice._

 _"Oh, hey, Quis," he grunted. "Selph here? Got her ice."_

 _Selphie came into the room as Quistis irritably turned to her. "You sent Zell out to get your ice?"_

 _"I passed him in the hallway. He said he'd get it for me" Quistis looked disapprovingly at her. "It's heavy," she whined. Selphie gestured for Zell to come into her room. "Just put it in this cooler."_

 _Quistis sat down and picked her book back up and tried reading again, but couldn't find the will to concentrate with all the noises going on in the other room. "You can put the rest in the freezer," she heard Selphie say. Zell came back out with a half bag and proceeded to shove it into the top compartment of the refrigerator._

 _"Zell, do you think this is going to work?" Quistis asked._

 _"Oh, I think if I squeeze really hard," he said as he put his shoulder into it._

 _"No, I mean with Selphie. Did she tell you what she was doing?"_

 _"Yeah, I know," he said as he closed the freezer door and came over._

 _"If you were dating a girl, would this work on you?"_

 _"Hmm," he put a finger to his chin and looked up as if in deep thought. "Well, I don't know. A massage is nice, but I'm not really into roses or candles."_

 _Selphie said, "I'm trying to make it as romantic as I can."_

 _"Oh, it's plenty romantic," Zell said._

 _"Quistis thinks I'm trying to ensnare him."_

 _"That's not what I said," Quistis replied. "You two have been seeing each other for a while, but he hasn't said anything about you to anyone. He hasn't dropped any hints to any of us about how he wants to be more than friends. Don't you think he'd do that if he wanted to? And we'd be the first to tell you." Quistis knew what big gossips the girls in their clique were, herself included._

 _"Yeah, not to me, either," Zell said. "He's been acting like the same old loverboy Irvine."_

 _"Look, I don't care what you say. If he can put the moves on me, I can put the moves on him."_

 _"All right," Quistis sighed and picked her book back up. "Good luck."_

 _"Yeah, good luck, Selphie. See ya," the oblivious Zell said and exited the dorm._

* * *

"I didn't know you were also supposed to get a card with the wedding present," Squall said.

The commander scanned the surroundings in the gift shoppe, the first thing he did in any new environment.

"Well, we don't want to seem cheap, do we?" Rinoa answered.

"Guess not," he replied. They went past shelves of teddy bears holding hearts, candles, artificial flowerpots, and other lovey-dovey crap. Squall thought they should have called this the 'I screwed up, honey' store. Rinoa led him to the card rack that encircled the entire establishment.

The selection was slim, at best. The commander noticed a sign above the card rack that read 'Due to inventory problems, we apologize for the lack of selection. Look for supplies to go up the 11th.' Well, fat lotta good that did them, that was three weeks after the wedding.

"Pretty slim pickings," Rinoa said, looking at the empty slots in the rack.

"Yeah." At least this meant they wouldn't be spending eight hours looking at cards, trying to find the 'right' one. There were some somber and serious, some funny. Rinoa squatted to the bottom of the rack, already scouting for a good one. Squall picked the one closest to him and started reading. It had a long poem written in illegible cursive. He put it back.

"Here, this one's good," Rinoa handed up a card she found. Squall looked at it, it was another love soliloquy with an autumn motif.

"Uh-huh," he said as he handed it back to her.

The next three he chose had a similar theme, some lacy love sonnet inscribed in gold embossed lettering. None of these were working for him. None seemed appropriate. He just couldn't feel the love between them. And thus couldn't find a card to communicate his appreciation for that love. This wedding wasn't about love, it was about time. He decided to try the funny ones.

The thing about these was there wasn't any special message about a long life together, just a cheap laugh. The first one he took said something about how everything at the wedding was special, but the only thing anyone's going to be paying attention to is the bride's dress. Not that funny. And this seemed like something more suitable for sending in the mail. They would have been reading it after they had the wedding. Another joked about tripping on the bride's train. Selphie's dress probably didn't have a train. He needed something for a less elaborate wedding. Another one had two wedding rings holding each other's hands. Squall thought they looked like pasta rings.

Squall began to think about how useless this was, trying to find an appropriate card for an inappropriate wedding, especially when he could count the selection of cards on two hands. Too bad no one made a 'congratulations on getting knocked up and married in a hurry' card. Maybe they should have taken a funeral card and written in 'condolences on your getting married'.

Nonetheless, Squall kept looking, a bit quicker this time, not really hopeful. One was something stupid about 'feathering the nest'. Rinoa on occasion handed him one to look at, which he usually dismissed with an 'uh-huh'.

"I feel like I've gone through them all already," Squall said.

He spotted one down in the corner with a blue background and two moombas with their tails intertwined. On the inside it said 'have a nice life together' - perfectly non-committal.

"How's this?" Squall said and handed her the card. She looked at it.

"That's pretty good. You wanna go with this?"

"Sure."

"Okay, grab the envelope." Squall took the envelope behind the card. "We also need to get wrapping paper."

They searched over the store, trying to find some wrapping paper for the knife set. Everything they saw was for something other than weddings - birthdays, solstice festival, graduation. Rinoa walked up to the clerk.

"Do you have any wedding present wrapping paper?"

"Um, everything we've got is out there, I think."

Squall overheard the question as he perused the rolls sticking out of the end of a card rack. There was some purple pattern with red hearts. It was meant for a birthday, but it could work in theory. There was also some yellow birthday wrap that didn't seem too improper to be used for a wedding. What was with this store and their lack of things to buy? Finally, he saw a half-roll deep in the trough, nearly unnoticeable. It was egg white with the phrase 'two hearts, two lives, one dream' watermarked on it. That seemed good enough for him. Squall picked it out and showed it to Rinoa who had just approached. She nodded and they took it to the counter. Squall began to wonder if anyone even had weddings in this town.

* * *

Undergraduate Tilkan stepped into the foresty training center - a strange amalgamation of coniferous forest and tropical jungle. A robed member of the Garden Faculty shuffled close behind him.

"It's been here for a few days, I think," he said to the Shumi. "I think the Grats have started going after it now. It's just past here."

They continued walking, avoiding encounters with the monsters, until they found a nearly fallen palm tree, tilted over the ground. It looked precariously balanced, ready to snap off and roll onto the walkway, possibly impeding an escape route. The faculty member bent down to examine the root of the tree.

"Looks like it's broken off at the base. Interesting."

The student put his hands on his knees and hovered over the faculty, inspecting the tree as well.

"See here, it's pulling up a wire." He pointed to an exposed wire, yanked up by the roots. "Looks like someone's been chewing on it. Mice... or the Grats, possibly."

"The only wires here are for the lights," he looked to the ceiling for any outages. "We'll get this fixed right away. Don't want anyone to get electrocuted." The Shumi stood up and dusted off his broad hands.

Suddenly, they both heard an odd noise, like a mouse squeak. The student held up his hand to stifle the faculty member and opened his ears. The squeak was actually more like a whimper. He followed the muted noise down the path. It only took a few steps until they heard it clearly behind a collection of foliage. The student gently pushed the leaves out of the way.

"Selphie? I mean, Instructor Tilmitt?" Tilkan said.

Selphie was curled up, leaning against a palm tree trunk with her knees under her, clutching her nunchaku like a teddy bear. She quickly wiped her eyes.

"Oh, yes," she said clearly. "I'm fine." She sniffled. "I tripped, got some dirt in my eye."

"Uh," Tilkan and the faculty were dumbfounded. "Do you need any help?"

"No," she said as she bent down and picked her nunchaku off the ground. Her knees buckled. The two quickly went to help her by holding her arms. "No, really, I'm fine. I have to go." She gently brushed off their arms and walked quickly out of the bushes as she cleared her throat.


	8. Day 8: Monday

DAY 8 - MONDAY

"Here we go, it's easy." Xu said as she sat Rinoa down at her desk. "You got two boxes - in and out. That's all you need to know. Oh, that, and when Cid calls you in, but he'll just tell you what he needs done."

"You call him Cid? Not Mr. Kramer, or Headmaster Kramer?"

"No. Why, is that what you call him?"

"No, but I'm not a SeeD, I'm not working under him."

"No, Cid likes being called Cid. He doesn't like to seem too authoritarian."

Rinoa nodded. So far, this job seemed easy enough. Xu had heard Rinoa was looking for a position in Garden to feel like she belonged, and substitute secretary seemed like a good option. Xu had been looking to get out of clerical duty and do some missions like she was graduated to do. Right now, she had been stuck behind a desk for so long she could barely take on a T-Rexaur anymore. It would be nice to get out into the world again. She missed the days of battles she had before she took this position.

"All right," Xu continued her tutorial. "Let's try one." She took a sheet from the 'in' basket and brought it in front of the desk. "Okay, here is a requisition form. The only parts of the form you need to know are the sales rep name, phone number, address, title, gross amount, net amount, allocation, deadline date, absolute deadline date, scope, and any collateral files that might be attached or in the comments field."

"Uh..."

"This is for a food order for the cafeteria, so we've got to compare the cost of what they requested to the budget allotment they are allowed for this month. Or sometimes it's by quarter, depends on the department."

"Yeah."

"So we enter it into the computer."

Xu crouched over Rinoa's armrest and typed her login then accessed some programs too fast for Rinoa to see to get to the financial manager program with white-on-black. "So we take the number from this box B here and enter it in, then we hit the availability forecast button, and..." she waited until a window with a bunch of numbers in a table popped on the screen, "We see that they're okay for that request. So we'll fill in the rest of the form in the blank boxes and send it on its way. Oh, sometimes you have to convert the number from Balamb measurement because this system takes Galbadian measurement. Okay?"

"Okay." Rinoa did understand. It was done a little fast, but she understood enough of it to get by. She was a smart girl, she could fill in the gaps by herself.

"Okay, so now we look at what they're ordering and compare it to the inventory manager." She brought up another program with black-on-white text and typed some numbers in the form field while clicking around. Rinoa was making careful notes in her head as where she was going. "So we're in the cafeteria inventory here, and we do a search, and we see that they're not approved for this order, but since they're requesting hot dogs, it's okay, cause they always run out of those anyway. This system really isn't meant for large orders like this. So we just enter in 1,200,000 gross."

"We're gonna have a lot of fat SeeDs," Rinoa joked.

"Ha-ha, yeah." Xu finished filling in the blanks on the form. "And now we hit submit and it gets sent on its way."

"To?"

"The food distribution center in Balamb."

"Ah."

"Also, we print out a hard copy for our records just so if there's any disputes we've got something hard to look at." Xu went over to the already printing machine and tore off the invoice. "And that's what the 'out' basket is for," she said as she slipped it in. "Later we'll put it in an envelope and send it off. Okay, take this one." She took another sheet off the 'in' box and put it in front of Rinoa. "See, if you can do this one."

"Okay." Rinoa looked up and down the invoice, carefully reading the information, taking into account all the fields and numbers she had to tabulate. "So, first I check to see if the money is available."

"Right."

"And to do that I go to-"

Xu's intercom buzzed, Cid came on the speaker. "Xu, could you come in here for a second?"

She pushed in the 'talk' button. "Sure," then turned back to Rinoa. "I'll be right back." Xu opened the double doors to Cid's office across the way.

After a few minutes, Rinoa started to think that Xu wouldn't be back for a while. Getting bored, and slightly worried that all the things she had learned were about to fall out of her head, she decided to try and enter this one on her own. This one was for the Garden garage. They were ordering a shipment of rotary gears for 5,000 GP. She started typing numbers into their appropriate fields. Unbeknownst to her, she entered 5,000 in the quantity area, rather than the price area. While trying to submit, an error message kept popping up, saying they did not have the available budget. Then she remembered she had to check that other thing first. She clicked over to the white availability forecast and entered in the department requesting this order. The result, as far as Rinoa could tell from her limited exposure to this program, was that they only had 50 GP left in the budget after this order. She looked back to the form, seeing if there was anything she missed. In the comments box, the person who made this request wrote and underlined 'desperately need'.

Well, if they desperately needed it, but couldn't afford it, she wasn't sure what she could do. Though there was a section on the budget to add in residual amount. So she allocated them 1,000 GP more, just to try and get the form to submit. Otherwise, she'd be stuck waiting for Xu again. The program still didn't let her submit the invoice, so she tried entering 10,000 GP. That let her submit. Next, she had to check their inventory to see if they needed it. There was no entry for rotary gears, but there was one for rotors. Maybe they were the same thing, like rotary gears was a subgroup of rotors or something, so you could have rotary axles, and rotary pinions. She really didn't have time to pick up any of the jargon during her brief stint as a mechanic.

This was really boring, she thought. Was this what Xu did all day? And she enjoyed it?

Now she needed to fill in the address and a bunch of other fields. She did all she could, then hit the submit button again, just in case it didn't go through the first time. The printer fired up and began printing a copy of the invoice, just like it was supposed to. She scooted over in her swivel chair and took it out. Since she was waiting, rather than stick it in the outbox, and since she was doing so well to begin with, she'd just mail it herself. She already had the address from the invoice. This would need one of those big yellow envelopes, and Xu had already shown her where the supply cabinet was. Amongst the staples and paperclips there was a pile of yellow envelopes. She picked the top one up out of the drawer and several cards fluttered to the floor.

"Whoops, that one wasn't empty," she said to herself as she saw one of the cards float under the cabinet.

Uh-oh, she thought. She got down on her hands and knees and futilely tried fingering the card out. But the supply cabinet was too close to the ground. Okay, no problem, she'd just have to move the cabinet itself. It wasn't that big. She gripped both sides with her hands and started shuffling it back and forth like a herringbone further away from the wall, only going about an inch at a time. No card yet, but there was a lot of dust back there.

"What are you doing?" Xu exclaimed, just outside the door across the room. A surprised Rinoa turned to her.

"I was getting an envelope, but something fell under."

"There's a bunch of them in the bottom drawer." She bent down to the desk and pulled out a duplicate envelope.

"Oh, I didn't know they were there too." Rinoa said as she picked up the card. Xu sat down on the computer, clicking to a different window and looking to a piece of paper she had written a note from Cid on, while Rinoa shuffled the supply cabinet back against the wall.

"Uh, this is strange," Xu muttered.

"What?"

"There's 4,500 GP missing from the petty cash fund."

"Uh-oh," Rinoa uttered.

"What?"

"Well, I was practicing on one while you were gone. And it wouldn't let me submit because they didn't have enough money in the budget, so I just gave them 1,000, but then that wasn't enough so I gave them 10,000."

"For this one? For the garage?"

"Yeah, they said 'desperately need' on it, and it wasn't letting me get it through."

"This one is only for 50 GP, that's completely under budget for automotive."

"No, it was for 5,000."

"No, 5,000 is the quantity, that's how many are in a box. The box is 50."

"Oh... I guess that's what I did wrong."

"Well, that's okay, just as long as you didn't hit 'submit'."

"Oh, uh..."

"You hit submit?"

"Well, no, I hit it twice. I wasn't sure if it had gone through."

Xu paused, "Now I've got to call them and tell them to cancel the order. Both orders. And I've got to call the computer department and tell them to do a database purge for the last hour of all changes. If you allocate revenue from the residuals it skims off all available budgets and then goes into the emergency fund. You just gave the garage about 1,000 more money than they were allocated. And everything I did in the last hour I'm gonna have to do all over again." She grasped her forehead exasperatedly. "This completely screws up next month's funds."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Rinoa looked down at the floor. Again, she cursed herself. No matter what job she tried she ended it by klutzing it up. "So I hear there's an opening for janitor."

* * *

Squall turned the key in his mailbox and opened it. All mail was delivered to the front desk and set up for students as if in an apartment. It certainly wouldn't do for every room to have a mail slot. Chocobo messengers only delivered mail once a week. It was especially difficult to get to Balamb with the bright yellow birds unable to cross large bodies of water and being skittish around trains, the only other mode of transportation.

The commander shuffled through the collection of mostly junk mail and threw everything but two letters in the trash. Both were business-related and probably not worth opening and reading. On the bottom of the envelope was a yellow slip indicating he had a package at the front desk. Squall walked up to the receptionist in the Balamb Garden lobby and put his slip on the counter. The student worker looked up from his book.

"I have a package," Squall said, raising his voice a little as if it were a question.

The student put her book down and picked up the slip. She went into the back room while Squall leaned on the counter. Getting a package was always kind of exciting. He rarely ever got real mail due to his family circumstances. He preferred communication over the computer networks anyway. You got a response more quickly and it was neatly formatted. Other students had families in far-off places that they wrote to and received care packages from. Some even went so far as to make Garden a nearly permanent residence.

The woman came back with a medium-sized rectangular box. "Here you go. I just need you to sign for it." She pulled out a clipboard and made an 'X' near the bottom of the list. Squall signed his name and took the package away. Squall looked at his prize as he walked back to his room. The return address said it was from The Blue Lake Corporation. The only packages Squall ever received were ones he sent to himself, through mail or online ordering since he had an aversion to shopping, so it was never very much of a surprise when he got one. This one, he wasn't quite sure what it was. He vaguely remembered ordering something from that site, but didn't think it could be what he thought it was. The package was way too big. He couldn't tell by weight either, but it was pretty light.

When he got it back to his empty bedroom he grabbed a pen, the nearest sharp object, and punctured the cellophane tape, slicing downward. There was a host of styrofoam peanuts inside. Squall dug around in the fluffy contents, not finding anything of note at first, wondering if he was sent an empty package. Then he hit a small box. He pulled it out and looked at it.

"Guess it was what I thought," he said to himself. He didn't think he would have gotten it so soon. He opened up the box and took a look at it. It seemed too small, not like the picture he saw on the site. The jewels were so tiny. He momentarily had second thoughts about it, wondering whether he should give it to her at all. Well, he'd already spent money on it and the date was coming up and he had to give her something. It just seemed so pitiful. Or he could give it to her as a regular ring, and not mention what it was, just drop that thing totally. Except that sounded stupid.

Oh, this was so juvenile. It didn't even mean anything. It was just a stupid ring, there was no reason to be stressing over it this much. It was a gift high-schoolers gave each other. Why was he bothering with it? It was so hard to give a girl any kind of ring because there was so much stigma attached to it. And Irvine and Selphie's wedding was just going to overshadow the importance of it. Why was their relationship inexplicably symbolized by rings?

He ran his hands through his thick hair and held up the ring to his eyeline. "What am I gonna do with you?" He tilted it back and forth to catch the reflection of the ceiling light. It was a tiny little band with diamonds embedded in a groove on the top. He hadn't wanted to get something too big or it would have looked gaudy. Rinoa was not a fan of big jewelry.

This thing was messing with his mind. He was not cut out for this romantic stuff, these little milestones and rituals. He put the ring inside the box and shoved it into the bottom drawer of his nightstand where he knew Rinoa would not look before he gave it to her.

He left his room and headed up to his office to try and get some work done. He passed Xu and entered his personal space. Like he had left it, the center of his desk was cluttered, but organized and his computer monitor glowed white. He sat down to write and read some documents, giving himself some nice and much needed mental distraction from all the current events. At least there was one thing he could always count on in life - work was always there, and there was always plenty to be done. He sorted. He organized. He completed some signatures. And he came to some follow-up documents regarding his mission in Esthar. For some reason, upon seeing the name of the continent he thought of Laguna, whose life was inexplicably meshed with his during the time compression event.

Hmm, he hadn't had any contact with him for a while. With him being in that isolationist country, the exchanges were few and far between. Not that Squall minded it that much. Probably no one had thought to inform him about what was going on. He didn't know how much he kept in touch with the others, but he was probably out of the loop. Rinoa had even said so, didn't she? Squall wasn't quite sure whether he deserved to be in it, but maybe this was a good opportunity. His friends kept saying he should try to take a step, to let him know what was going on in his personal life. This was probably something pretty important. The combination of wanting to prove he could take a step forward and wanting to let him know what was going on provoked him to pull out his keyboard drawer and activate the electronic letter program.

As the program started up, he wondered what Laguna's reaction would be when he heard the news. Squall was more curious about how he would react than scared to reach out to him. It might prompt a catch-up phone call. He might try and fly across the world on the Ragnarok to get to the wedding. He might be angry he wasn't invited. This was definitely a surprise if ever there was one. Not only was he interested in how he would respond to the news, but also to the fact that he was sending him a letter that was not a reply to something. They'd had limited contact these past twelve months for obvious reasons, not only because of the reconstruction and xenophobia of Esthar, but their own relationship. Squall wasn't one to forgive and forget being left an orphan for seventeen years.

Of course, now came the problem of how to describe these events. Rinoa always said he had horrible tact and never knew how to break delicate situations so he would have to watch that. Fortunately, Laguna was so lackadaisical he probably wouldn't care about the letter's business sense. No matter what, this would be out of the blue. There weren't going to be any ways to break it gently. He wasn't quite sure what to say. He never really knew how to talk to him, under any circumstances.

Well, all letters started with a greeting, then it was best to just give him as many facts as possible, try and answer all the questions he was going to have, since he wasn't going to be able to come, being too far out and too short of notice. He really hoped he didn't drop everything and try to run out there, that would be overly awkward. The first part was proving somewhat difficult though, he wasn't really sure what to call him. There were so many titles he had, not all of them really nice. Of course, when he talked to him about it, he had said 'Do whatever you're comfortable with. I'll be waiting.' Squall started writing.

 **Laguna,**

 **How are you. I have some**

Squall stopped himself before he put down an adjective, caught between whether to write 'good news' or 'bad news'.

 **news that I thought you might want to know. Selphie is pregnant and Irvine and her are getting married on the 28th at 4pm in Galbadia. The baby is expected to be born in August. They are getting married before Irvine ships off on a year-and-a-half long mission to the Island Closest to Hell. Apparently, the baby was conceived some time during Irvine's off-mission to Galbadia. Both of them seem quite ecstatic about getting married. Their primary motivation is financial - the SeeD insurance she gets if Irvine dies while on the island. Selphie plans to keep the baby and still act as a SeeD while she's pregnant. She's talked about getting a place on Obel Lake, since Garden is not really capable of taking care of babies.**

Squall stopped writing and leaned back in his chair as he had a break in his train of thought, reading over what he wrote. It sure was dry. But that was all that needed to be known. He couldn't inject his own opinion into it. Whenever anyone talked to Squall about Laguna they all kept saying 'reach out to him', 'take a step'. He wanted to try and be more human, to tell him what was really going on, now that he had gotten the statistics out of the way.

 **I think a lot of people are put off by this. Selphie and Irvine's relationship has been on-again, off-again. Several times in the past months, Irvine has said how he didn't want a relationship with Selph, hence why he broke it off two months ago. At first all the girls were quite excited about the marriage, but now they are starting to realize lots of changes are going to happen. Neither of them are ever going to be the same. A lot of people are confused on how to react.**

Squall sat back again. That was true, there were a lot of people confused about how to react. It has been confusing times. Some people were putting up fronts, some were genuinely happy, some were very honest with their opinions, some were avoiding the issue entirely. Even Selphie and Irvine were confused.

 **Let me know if you have any questions. We don't expect to see you there, so don't worry about that.**

 **-Squall Leonhart**

Squall read the letter again carefully the whole way through, looking for mistakes or untruths, or things he just didn't want to say. Just for the hell of it, on his closure he backspaced his last name out and wrote Laguna's appellation. He examined the result - Squall Loire. It looked very weird, it was too short. Ah well, it was just a whim anyway. He erased the misnomer and left it as 'Squall'.

* * *

"All right. One, two, three, four."

Irvine tapped his heel on the back of the stage to count off the meter. Zell burst into his bold saxophone introduction. The cowboy strummed along in the rhythm section with his acoustic guitar - a convention almost cliché. Despite that they were tucked into the farthest corner of the quad, the loud music still penetrated into the central fountain. They sounded good though, despite it being just a fun jam session. SeeD required learning at least one instrument during the academic program at an expert level. Not everyone kept their's up after the class was over, but Irvine and Zell had.

The acoustics of the quad emboldened Zell's brass section, while still keeping Irvine's guitar from being dwarfed into obscurity. The two dissimilar instruments mish-mashed eclectically. Passing students took a stop or slowed down in the hall to hear the strange jazzy warbling coming from the quad. Irvine bobbed his head along to the beat, keeping time with his foot, and occasionally glancing at the sheet music at his side. Zell, having memorized the music already, barreled his body up and down as if he were in a fight with his saxophone.

As they wound down to the end of the piece, Zell jumped into an improvisational solo, spinning around and winding like he was ballroom dancing. His fingers flew over the keys without discernable direction or pattern.

"Whoa, whoa," Irvine said, "Whoa, there, Zell." He fluttered his hand to get Zell's attention, trying to awaken him out of his trance. Zell opened his eyes and looked around. "Take it down a notch there. I thought you were gonna body slam the sax."

"Oh, yeah," he said as he pulled the horn away from his mouth. "I can get pretty into it."

"Good solo though."

"Heh, think we can play at your wedding?" Zell asked with bright eyes.

"I don't think the chapel is going have the equipment or speakers."

"Oh," Zell said.

"Besides, we sound kind of weird when we play. Remember last time? At FH?"

"Oh, yeah," Zell said, reminiscing about a year ago when they played for Squall and Rinoa, trying to get them to realize their feelings for each other. They used quite a strange arrangement of instruments and the two just ended up feeling more confused.

"Speaking of which," Irvine said, "I hear you've been scrambling for a date these days. You've had some interesting experiences."

Zell held his hand to the back of his head. "Ah, yeah, except no takers. People say I'm trying too hard."

"Exactly, man. Half the battle is knowing what not to do."

"How do you do it? ... I mean, how did you do it?"

Irvine pulled the strap over his head and put his bulky guitar behind him. "Y'see, it's all about flow, like the line of a bullet as it leaves the gun." He held up his hands as if he was firing his sniper rifle. "Go straight for the heart."

"Okay." Zell thought about writing this all down, but he didn't want to seem too nerdy.

"It's all about the flirting. And the key to flirting is making a girl feel special. Personally, I don't know how they can't see through it, but don't knock what works, eh?"

"Uh, I'm sorta lost," Zell said. "With the bullets and the heart?"

"Okay, say there's a cutie you like. Bam, zing, you look at her and she looks at you." Irvine waved his hands as if he was directing a scene. "Your eyes meet and then she turns away, shyly. Now she knows you exist, for the moment. Wait for a bit. If she's with her friends, they're going to talk about you and judge you for a second. She may or may not make a move, depending on how aggressive she is. It's your job to prevent that."

"Oh, okay," Zell said, surprised at that comment, but still with ears and mind open.

"Here's what you do. You take your drink-"

"What if I don't have a drink?" Zell didn't like to drink alcohol, anything to keep his body in tip-top condition.

"Okay, forget the drink."

"Do I have to have a drink? I guess I can take one and not drink it."

"Forget the drink! It's not important. You approach her and you say 'hey, how you doin' baby'? My name's Irvine', or in your case 'Zell'."

Zell rolled his eyes at the dry humor.

Irvine continued, "And then you say 'some friends of mine over there told me there was a cute woman with...' and then you describe some feature that they have, the hair or eyes, or something distinguishable, something unique and detailed about her, something that she picked out herself, like her earrings so that she feels complimented on her taste."

"I never notice girls' earrings."

"No one does! That's the beauty of it. No guy pays attention to that sort of thing, so when someone does, they feel special."

"I've heard they have these things on their bodies called cuticles that they care about keeping them clean or something, even though I've never heard about that in any of my biology books."

Irvine thought. "I wouldn't use that until you learn what it means. Women have all sorts of body parts that have weird names. The approach is the key though."

Zell shook his head. "It can't be that simple. You can't just go up to a random girl and say 'hey, you don't know me, but you're cute'."

"Of course, you don't say that. That's ridiculous. That's why you just slip in a little at a time. When I was with Selphie, I 'conveniently' found places where she was. If she went some place, I went with her, like the train window. Y'see, no one dates anymore, you just find yourself hanging out with the same person more than others. Once you're there, you start making rhetorical comments as if you were on a TV show, talking to the imaginary audience. If she responds to them, good. And you respond to the ones she makes."

Zell registered the comments and lessons Irvine was giving him in his mind. Then compared it with his timetable. All these tips had to do with the long-term. If it took this long to get a date, he was plumb out of luck. "Oh, it's hopeless. I don't have time to hang out with a girl for a long time. It's only five days away."

"You don't need to tell me how many days there are left." Irvine picked up his hat and rubbed his forehead. "You know, not many girls want a wedding as their first date. Maybe it's best if you go stag."

"But I won't know anyone else there. It'll be awkward."

"But all your friends from here will be there. Quistis isn't taking anyone. Squall and Rinoa are already attached. None of my Galbadia friends are attached. Cid and Matron are just... old. You'll be fine. It's not like you're gonna have any less of a good time without a date. I don't think ten percent of the people bringing a date aren't already attached to someone. In fact, if you did bring a date, I think you would be the odd man out."

"Yeah, I suppose." Zell shrugged. Irvine did make a lot of sense.

"Oh, and one more thing," Irvine said as he picked up his guitar. "Girls love a musician. Especially a guitar player."

Zell grinned widely. "Nah-uh, I think girls love sax better than guitar."

Irvine blinked and smiled wryly. "What?"

"Girls love sax better."

"Come again?"

Zell yelled. "Sax! Girls love sax bet-"

Irvine burst out laughing and rolled over onto the stage.

Zell shook his fist and trembled with phony rage. "Oooooh," he grumbled.

* * *

Selphie pushed all her emotions down inside her, as if she were preparing for battle. In a little way, she was. More accurately, it would be a confrontation - one with herself. She took a deep breath, grimaced, and clenched her fist as she stepped onto the Balamb pier. She wasn't going to be intimidated by him. She wasn't going to back down or be manipulated.

She could see Raijin and Fujin near the middle of the pier, hovering over a dirty white bait cooler. From her angle of approach, at the end of the harbor she could see the back of a familiar figure in a long gray coat idly sitting off the edge with a fishing pole in hand. As she got closer she could hear the two partners arguing in their unusual speech patterns with the bait as the victim in a tug of war.

"I'm tellin' ya, leeches are what's bitin' today, ya know," Raijin said as he pulled the box towards him.

"MINNOWS," Fujin replied.

"No way, José. They all say leeches are what's hot, ya know."

"THREE. ZERO."

"I know how many you caught-"

Fujin stopped tugging on the box and froze in place, looking at the pier. Raijin became confused and looked where she was looking. Selphie stood at the end of the dock. The thunder-like man immediately dropped his hand and stood straight as a soldier. Fujin did the same too, guarding the dock from intruders. Selphie walked up to them.

"Hi, guys," she said. She didn't know Fujin and Raijin too well, at least not on a familiar level. She transferred from Trabia only shortly before the time compression incident. They were apparently notorious in Balamb Garden as enforcers of the discipline committee, along with their leader. Selphie had been stopped by their doctrine more than once during her time there. Through all the battles and animosity they'd had, she was hoping they were a little more forgiving than she thought they'd be. "Is it all right if I see Seifer?"

Raijin and Fujin looked at each other. "REASON?" Fujin stated.

"Ahem," Raijin coughed. "Hey, he's a busy man. He can't be bothered with petty things, ya know."

"I just want to talk to him... in private."

"About beating the snot out of him? I don't think so. We don't need your SeeD around our-"

"Let the girl by, you morons."

Raijin and Fujin snapped their heads behind them to Seifer. His head was turned to the side, looking at the scuffle out of the corner of his eye. "It's a free dock."

The two partners in crime shrugged and stepped to the side to let her pass. Selphie walked by them as they took their tackle box back into the wharf.

Selphie treaded carefully down the dock, unsteady with the motion of the ocean waves sloshing against the poles below her. The soft waterlogged wood felt like it was going to cave in under her. Seifer reeled in his line as she came down the dock. He stood up and turned to her as he started disassembling his pole for storage. Although he had recognized her, he still hadn't really acknowledged her presence yet. He hadn't even made eye contact. This was so weird. One of her deadliest enemies lived right next door.

"So what brings you down here, messenger girl?" the tall man said, focused on his reel.

"Look, I know we don't know each other real well, but you were still a big part of our lives." He stood a full foot taller than her, adding to his intimidation. "Have you heard about what happened?"

"Heard you were in town shopping for wedding stuff. Are congratulations in order?" He finally gave her a passing glance, as if he was just checking she was still there.

Selphie remained silent and shifted her eyes into the dark blue ocean. She clasped her hands in front of her. Seifer looked up at her when she didn't speak.

"...Or not," Seifer finished.

"Irvine and I- I'm- He's getting shipped off in a few weeks for a mission. And..." She unclasped her hands and held one to her stomach as if she were nursing an ache.

"I see," he said with very little surprise. "I know it's a moot point, but they have a day-after pill you can get these days."

"Irvine... doesn't believe in birth control, just the withdrawal method. He wouldn't let me get it, even if I wanted to. I guess it's just part of his philosophy."

"And you went along with it? Surprising." He broke apart his disassembled reel. "I guess he learned a good lesson about his beliefs."

"I guess," she mumbled.

"Well, I hate to see you come all the way down to the wharf and leave empty-handed, but I'm afraid my gynecology certification hasn't been approved yet," he said humorlessly.

"No, that's not why I'm here," she said, just as humorlessly. "I need to know what I'm doing is right." Selphie emboldened herself and made eye contact with Seifer. "Irvine's leaving on a mission in a few weeks. A long-term mission. For a year and a half."

"And you're getting married quickly because you got a bun in the oven. Is that the bits and pieces?"

"Right."

"And now you come to me? Well, well, when did I become commander? You're asking advice from a man who tried to obliterate your soul."

"I can't ask anything from Squall. Everyone in Garden seems to be acting weird around me. I know they're thinking things but they won't tell me, and I'm too afraid to ask them. Squall kept saying he had no opinion until he told me off in the middle of the quad. Rinoa and Quistis were happy for me until a week later. Then they cornered me and grilled me about what I was going to do with my life, like I was a criminal. Zell's the only one who doesn't seem to mind, but he's too concerned about getting a date for the wedding. Xu's just been quiet about the whole thing. Cid and Matron... well, they're them. They're like a second mom and dad. I'm afraid of what they'd say if I asked them about anything. And Irvine, I can't really talk about this to him, he's too close to it all. There's no one else I know that I can talk to about this... except you."

"Well, that puts things in a bit more perspective." Seifer scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Squall really lost his cool in front of everyone, huh? Would've liked to see that." He returned to his fishing equipment. "But I can't be that high on your long list of counselors after your battle mates. A girl like you has lots of friends."

"You were also head of the disciplinary committee though, so you've seen a lot of the bad things people did in Garden."

Seifer smirked. "Yeah, I saw my share. The thing about being a policeman, everyday you're looking at the armpit of society. It takes a special kind of person not to go crazy from that." He laughed.

"So, I wanna know, what are they really thinking? Why are people reacting this way? Is it because I'm making," her voice petered down to a weak whisper. "The wrong decisions? Are all of them wrong?"

Seifer paused, thinking. "Lemme tell you a little story. Back when I was a student, about a month after I became head of the disciplinary committee, we got a call from Cid. He said a cadet had gotten pregnant by another, and we were to escort her quietly off campus. Who knows where she is today. The father had been expelled as well, since he'd violated the Garden rule about promiscuity. We were to make sure the incident stayed quiet. To squelch any retaliation from his friends, and to make sure the secret didn't get out. It was all kind of an 'under-the-table' arrangement. Didn't want the word to get out. Not sure whether he was protecting the student or himself and Garden. But that was the line we were given.

"But I wanted action, I wanted retaliation. I felt like they were my students and I was their sole guardian, but Cid wouldn't tell us where the father was or who he was. So me and the posse did a little investigation of our own."

Seifer paused awkwardly in the middle of his story. "And then what?" Selphie asked.

"Let's just say he got a taste of what the girl would be going through in nine months."

Selphie decided not to ask what that meant.

"Of course, he said nothing to anyone about that. That would've unraveled the whole dark secret."

"I see."

"I guess what I'm trying to say, through my Raijin-esque talk, is that people react differently because they are different. I figure that these sorts of decisions are things that nobody really wants to make, but everyone thinks they can do better." He smirked in self-satisfaction.

Selphie smiled. "I understand. Thanks, Seifer."

"Anytime, messenger girl."

"Lap dog," Selphie commented as she turned towards the pier.

Seifer laughed heartily as she left.


	9. Day 9: Tuesday

DAY 9 - TUESDAY

Squall inserted his key into the weapons locker. Locker was a bit of a misnomer, since this was one of their largest storage rooms outside of the garage. They'd set it adjacent to the physical training rooms way in the back, and kept all the swords, staffs, guns, and countless other exotic weapons there. With a turn of his key, the lock clicked open and let him into the dark room.

The dry musty smell of a closet greeted him as he walked in between the metal grated shelves and hanging racks of blades. Besides weapons, the room also stored all the weapon cleaning supplies, which were what Squall was after now. The gunblade was a precision instrument and needed to be cleaned often for it to work properly. Otherwise it was just as likely to blow up in the user's face as the monster's. Cleaning it was Squall's favorite thing to do with his gunblade, next to swinging it.

He went way into the back, into an area smelling strongly of chemical solvents, and picked up some plastic bottles filled with dark liquid. Rinoa wouldn't let him clean his gunblade in their room. It was too much black powdery mess, even if he put a towel under it, and the ammonia scent would stay in the living room for days. He took the blade out of his hip holster, and knelt down to the floor. Making sure it was unloaded, he began disassembling it, starting by pulling out the barrel. He grabbed a small black wiry brush from the shelf, poured a little oil on it, and poked it into each hole to clean out the chambers. He tried to make each stroke, each push, as smooth and purposeful as possible.

A quiet noise at the front of the room alerted Squall, but he paid it little attention. People were coming in and out of here all the time. As the footfalls moved toward him, he knew this person was also coming towards the cleaning supplies.

"Hey, Squall," Irvine said. Squall flinched at the sound of the voice and politely looked up. He was strolling in with a long gun over his shoulder, wearing his full cowboy clothing and a big smile on his face. "Just getting some stuff for practice." Irvine patted him on the shoulder, to which Squall had to resist recoiling, and reached up to the top shelf. Squall had no desire to interact with him today, especially after being interrupted out of what was supposed to be a tranquil, solitary cleaning session. He tried to mentally project a Protect shield around him, trying to get him to go away.

"Got to get some ammo for the training center," he said. "Warming up my sniping skills for the mission."

"Uh-huh," Squall responded. He tried not to look at him, he just focused on his own cleaning procedure and nothing else. He tried to keep him out of his peripheral vision, if possible, just looking at his equipment. This was more awkward than words. Just focus on cleaning and get out of there.

"Yeah, I can take out a grat all the way at the other end of the training center with this thing. Take a look at this gun." He held out his long sniper rifle on both his hands. Squall took a cursory glance at it and went back to his business. "It's custom made. They sent it all the way from the Galbadian junk shop. It's got a 3,000 meter scope, titanium hammer and pin, 46 inch length, five round detachable box magazine, 3300 feet per second muzzle velocity, polished trigger, feels just like snapping a glass rod."

Squall barely nodded his head. Why wouldn't he just get his damn ammo and leave? There was nothing he wanted to talk to him about, and there was nothing he could say that Irvine wanted to hear. Was he completely oblivious to everything else that was going on? Did he forget he was gonna have a kid in a few months? It was like the only thing that existed for him now was his stupid fancy gun. His blood was boiling at his ignorant, flippant tone.

Irvine held it up vertically and took an admiring gaze himself. "Yeah, it's pretty spiffy. Only weighs twenty-two pounds. That's why they sent it to me early, so I could practice with it. Pretty soon, I'm gonna need to go outside to hunt monsters, I'll be so good." He grabbed a pack of high caliber rounds from the top shelf. "Yeah, these science team guys are pretty on the ball. I met a few of them when I was over there. It's all being led by this really old professor. And they have this science officer that's really cute."

Squall growled loudly in his mind, stopping his work for a moment to hate this a little more. Irvine just kept going, "This mission is going to be pretty cool, they're going to be erecting a big command station somewhere. They're not quite sure yet, because they need to scout around for a place that doesn't have too many monsters and some good draw points. They're making it an unmanned station, but they're building it out of this super-tight material. And these HD cables they invented are amazing. They have this special coating sealant they got from Esthar that wards off the monsters from chewing on them."

"Uh-huh," Squall said when Irvine paused to make sure he was paying attention. "That's great." Right now he wished he had an Irvine-warding-off sealant. Maybe the fewer words he spoke, the more he would get the hint to leave.

"So how are you doing?" he finally asked, peering into his scope from the opposite end.

"Fine," Squall said.

"Getting excited about the wedding?"

"Sure," Squall said. He was rather surprised Irvine had actually remembered he was getting married, the way he was talking about the mission.

"I'm getting married in a few days, I can't believe it. It's gonna be wild. Selphie's a great girl."

Irvine just kept talking and talking, and about absolutely nothing. Squall just continued wiping the excess solvent off his gun parts. He couldn't believe Irvine was so unmindful that he was trying to give him the cold shoulder. He just kept talking about his marriage, like he was forgetting the circumstances. Squall was so mad at him for not acting the way he thought he should have. Irvine was way too happy for the situation. He wasn't even doing anything anymore, he was standing there talking to him. He'd finished getting his ammo, he didn't need to be there anymore. Squall had no desire to interact with him, he didn't want to talk about what he was doing, he didn't want to talk about the wedding, he didn't want to talk about Selphie, he didn't want to talk about the baby-

"Can I have the brush?"

Squall staggered out of his reverie long enough to grope around for the wire brush and hand it to him.

"So that's how I thought we should do the cake," Irvine concluded. "Which I really don't think is too big of a deal to do, you know?"

Squall snapped the final two main pieces of his gunblade back together, and locked in the barrel. Thank god, he was done. He hoisted his gunblade over his shoulder, the griever key chain whipping back and forth, and passed Irvine by.

"Hey, are you going to the training center?" he called out after him.

Not anymore. "No, I'm going to sharpen my blade," he responded as he continued walking as fast as possible without seeming like he was rushing. Obviously, Irvine wanted to see if they could go in together, and that was the last thing he wanted.

"Oh, ok, see you later then. I'll be in the training center... all right?"

Squall walked out of the supply room, pretending the doorway had an invisible boundary that blocked off the sounds of ignorant people.

* * *

Xu tapped her foot as she waited for the elevator. Her legs were stiff from sitting in a chair all day today, coupled with having spent all day yesterday in the training center. She arched her back, hearing a few small snaps. Hopefully she wasn't going to get arthritis in the future. Back pain was the worst kind of pain she could imagine because it was so chronic and numbing. Her upturned eyes caught the elevator coming down. She pulled herself back upright and waited for the doors to open.

Selphie exited the elevator quickly, holding a stack of papers and a sandwich.

"Hi, Selphie," Xu said.

"Hi, Xu," she said with a partially full mouth as she walked by.

"Great Hyne, Selphie, what is that?" Xu said as she spun around as Selphie passed her.

Selphie stopped and turned back around. "What? This?" she said as she held up her sandwich. "It's a hoagie. I haven't had one for a while so I had the cafeteria make me one up special. It's got black olives, mushrooms, Reagan greens, Mimett greens, gysahl pickles, ham, tomato, chicken, turkey..."

Xu started turning green as she went on and on with each new ingredient. She couldn't handle eating that much food in two days let alone all in a sandwich.

"Jeez, Selphie, are you insane? You know you're eating for two now."

"Oh, come on, it's been only four weeks, it's not much more than a couple of cells now. Besides we're supposed to have strange cravings."

"Not until later, Selphie. Have you even been to a gynecologist yet?"

Selphie shrugged and looked down. "Should I? Already?"

"Yes!" Xu replied enthusiastically. "You should have as soon as you were pregnant. I'm sure Dr. Kadowaki can refer you."

"Refer me? You mean Dr. Kadowaki wouldn't be my doctor?"

"Well, I don't think she's licensed to practice OB/GYN stuff, she's general."

"But I've never been to a gynecologist before," Selphie whined. "Don't they stick cold metal things in there?"

Xu was stunned at her lack of information, but she kept her rationality. "It's just like a regular doctor appointment. I go to see one regularly, just for a check-up. They do some lab work and some blood work, a pap smear. She'll go over with you about exercise, nutrition, activities, travel, and any complaints and questions you have. It's basically the medical introduction to being pregnant. You might even get to hear the baby's heartbeat. And Irvine should be there too."

"I don't think I want to," Selphie said.

"You need to. You're certainly not going to deliver without help, are you?" Xu knew that Selphie would see reason eventually, and overcome her hesitation at sharing her body with professionals, especially because it was for the greater good. "Selphie, you got to start taking better care of yourself, and the baby. No more hanging from the rafters doing painting. I mean, your eating, for example. You gotta start eating things with lots of folic acid."

"Where in the world do I find that?"

"Well, uh, whole grain bread, leafy vegetables, cereal, liver," Xu counted off.

"Yuck, I'm not eating liver."

Xu tried to ignore her childish indignation. "Selphie, can you come with me?"

"Sure."

Xu led Selphie around the hub of Garden and back to her room. She went to her drawer and pulled out a white book with six baby pictures on the cover. "This is a baby book," Xu said. "I was going to give it to you as a wedding present, but apparently you need it now. It was my mom's, she had two kids when I was a teenager."

"I guess that's why you know so much about this."

Xu nodded as she opened the oversize book and turned it to the chapter titled 'What's Happening With Your Baby'. "Here we go. This is a week-by-week timeline." She handed the book over to Selphie. It showed a summarized breakdown of the baby's development period in an easy list format. She looked at her place in the line - four weeks. It was the first listed entry. Right now the baby was implanted into the uterus and was called a blastocyst. It would split into two parts, one of which would become the fetus, the other the placenta.

"Wow, I didn't realize how far along I was."

"The first trimester has a lot of rapid growth," Xu replied.

"Wow, thanks, Xu, you're a true friend," Selphie said as she pulled the book towards her.

"No problem. I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

Selphie smiled. "I have a feeling Auntie Xu is gonna be her favorite."

Xu smiled back.

Selphie closed the book and picked up her things. "OK, I gotta go now. Thanks for the book. Uh, you can have this sandwich." She handed her the multi-colored six-inch loaf and skittered out of the room. "Bye!"

"Uh, bye," Xu said, looking strangely at the sandwich. Compelled by curiosity, she took a bite. "Ewwyuck," she said. "You're going in the fridge. I can only imagine what the baby's gonna eat."

* * *

Squall leaned against the wall under the boat shop awning, comfortably shaded from the pounding afternoon sun. The air was quite cool from the ocean, but the huge yellow light in the sky seemed to be bombarding him with white hot heat. From here, he could see the entire boat dock anyway. Two steamers were berthing, but that was way over on the left. Straight ahead was a clear, blue plain. He could see fastitocalons jumping out of the rough, choppy water. Far away, the white SeeD ship began pulling over the horizon, soon to dock.

He wasn't really thinking about anything at the moment, just waiting for her. He'd been sent down here to greet her and accepted the task happily. Seeing Matron was always nice. Her and Cid's relationship was a strange one. The time she was a sorceress must have been a pretty chaotic one for those two. Before then, he couldn't really remember if Cid had been there at the orphanage with her or not. But after she had been purged of the evil Ultimecia wrought, they still lived separately, Cid at Garden, Edea at the lighthouse. Both still appeared to love each other like a husband and wife. But they both had work to do, so they lived separately. Squall could never imagine doing that with Rinoa. He thought he would be sick with loneliness if he'd done that, as he waited patiently for the boat to finish docking.

He walked down to the end of the pier where the white SeeDs were unloading boxes and crates for supplies. They were all teenagers hand-picked by Edea to protect her and Ellone, traveling from place to place in their specialized ship. They paid him no mind as Squall walked by them and looked up at the walkway ramp. Edea was standing up there, cautiously walking down. Squall couldn't help but smile as he looked at her. She was wearing a plain black sundress that matched her long black hair, holding an egg-white umbrella to protect her from the sun.

"Squall," she sang. "It's good to see you."

"It's good to see you too, Matron."

"You're getting so big now."

Squall cocked his head and smiled at her in a sarcastic manner. "I'm the same size as the last time you saw me. I stopped growing a while ago."

"I know, I just like to tell you that," she smirked as she closed her umbrella. "How is Rinoa?"

"She's fine."

"I suppose you two will probably be thinking about your future together after all this."

Squall's tongue was immediately tipped with the ring he had gotten for her. "I think it's been put on the backburner for now."

"Jistin," she called to one of the SeeDs. "Can you fetch my things from the cabin?"

"Yes, Matron," he said and sped up the ramp to her room. Squall was somewhat surprised, and a little jealous, that they called her Matron too. They slowly started walking down the end of the dock.

"Is Selphie all right?" she asked Squall.

"She's a little overstressed, but fine."

"And Irvine?"

Squall started to speak, then realized he really didn't know how Irvine was doing, as far as his reaction. He was gone for half of last week, and the only time he'd seen him after was in the meeting and at the weapons locker. Anything he could say about Irvine was nothing Matron wanted to hear. He couldn't even bear to look at him anymore, he was not the same person he remembered. He couldn't say his name without feeling a pang of disgust in his stomach.

"He's fine, too."

"Good. I think they'll be a good match together."

 _Under normal circumstances, maybe,_ Squall thought. _Why is this so weird, talking to Matron like this._

"Has commanding been all right?" she asked.

"Sometimes. I've been getting used to the load of paperwork, but I still get sent out on missions every once in a while. I just came back from one in Esthar a week ago."

"Oh, did you see your-"

"No, I didn't. We were in the mountains, outside the city."

"Ah."

The white SeeD Edea had called to earlier came up to the two of them, holding an open cardboard box with items sticking out. "All done," he said.

"Oh, thank you, just set it down."

Jistin set the box down and ran back to help the others with unloading. Edea bent down and started digging through the box, checking the inventory.

"I brought some of the old toys from the lighthouse along for Selphie. I thought she could use them. Help me carry them?"

Squall looked down into the box. It was like a tidal wave of memories wiped out his adult thought process.

There was so much power in those toys. As a child, an orphan, without many friends except your fellow orphans, you put all your focus and energy into toys. They became just as real as the living things around you. They were like the weapons they used today, you put everything you could behind them. Squall reached into the box and pulled out a rag doll, one that he remembered Quistis liked. Its bottom half was caked in mud, probably from being trampled, and it had lost one of its button eyes. He put it back and took out a stuffed moomba that had most of its fuzz worn off. The tuft of fur on the top of its head was shorn off when somebody tried to give it a haircut. The biggest item was a rocking-horse chocobo that would let you travel anywhere in the world, even to space. Next to that was a choo-choo train. Selphie loved that choo-choo train. She made it go as fast as she could. She'd watch it roll down the hill out back by the ocean, then run down and get it, then run back up and start over. She always wore denim overalls over a shirt. Matron made her wear them after she got sick of washing her nice clothes over and over again. Selphie loved playing on the beach cliffs behind the lighthouse, jumping around them, innocent of what she was going to become. Now she was who she was. She had that done to her.

"Oh god," he uttered.

"Squall, what's wrong?"

He wiped his hand down his face, clearing his expression, his mistake, his regret. He collected himself and refocused on the box. "Nothing." He picked it up and followed Edea down the wharf.

* * *

 _Quistis was marking some tests, listening to the orchestra piping into her headphones. She had heard the door outside open and close this morning, and hadn't come out at all because she was afraid of what she'd see. She was introverted, and didn't want the awkwardness of seeing Irvine and Selphie there, together, officially a couple, trying to make conversation as the residential third wheel. Mostly, though, she wanted to let them have their moment. She'd have to get used to it now. Irvine would be coming over quite a bit, but not to see them. To see her._

 _"Quisty? I need to talk." Selphie rapped on her door. Quistis thought she heard a noise and grasped around as if in the dark to find her CD player and fumble for the pause button. She wasn't quite sure if she was right though and waited. Selphie knocked again and voiced, "Quisty? I need someone to talk to, please? I feel like I might explode."_

 _Quistis opened the door. "Sorry, I had headphones on." She let her in and Selphie sat on her bed. She looked distraught._

 _"You were right. You were right all along." She looked up at her friend. Sadness marred her face, but she wasn't crying._

 _"What?"_

 _"You were right all along," Selphie just kept saying. "He just wants to... He didn't want-"_

 _"Hey, hey, slow down, tell me what happened." Quistis held out her hand._

 _"He came in and he saw all the stuff and at first he seemed really surprised, then he got into it. I didn't even get to pour the wine. He saw right through me. He knew what I was going to say. He said he didn't want to be tied down. Cause if a mission came up, he didn't want to have something here holding him back if he went off. I mean, I can understand that and we're still friends. I'm not really upset. I'm just disappointed. Really, really disappointed. I thought this was going to work, but you were right." She was staring at the back of her hand resting on her knee._

 _Quistis wasn't sure what to say. She felt both bad and good that it didn't work out. Nor was she very experienced in counseling, despite her years of teaching._

 _"Wait," the blonde said, "After all that, he still stayed the night? That was him I heard leave this morning, wasn't it?"_

 _"Well, yeah, I said we're still friends. He doesn't want anything to change between us." She hugged her stomach. "I really don't want things to change either."_

 _"Selphie, if you think staying with him like this is going to change his mind-"_

 _"No, no, I know, but it's still good to have someone by your side when you wake up." Quistis wasn't nearly convinced by this argument, and communicated this by glaring at her. "We've been... intimate together."_

What? Oh, god, I didn't want to know that, Selphie. _She thought they were just sleeping together. That's what Rinoa and Squall did at first. It was what she did with the last boyfriend she had._

 _"Oh god," Selphie cried, "I shouldn't have said that. Now you probably think I'm a slut."_

 _"No, I don't think you're a slut. I've had a lot of young students, and having sex before marriage does not make you a slut." Although, it did make her look differently at her. Quistis knew that was something wrong, but it was how she felt._

 _"It's not like he's using me for it," Selphie said, "He's real attentive to what I want and he's always so gallant."_

 _Quistis realized she was getting into territory she didn't want to get into. "Look, I trust that you know what you're doing. I can't tell you how to run your life."_

 _"But you disagree with it."_

 _"No, I don't. Honestly, there've been times I might do the same thing, with another guy."_

 _"No, you wouldn't."_

 _To be honest, there were a few times Quistis would've been led around with a leash by a boy she liked. Some she was good friends with now. Some were commander now. But those were in the past and she matured out of that._

 _"I admit, I am worried that Irvine is using you. But we're all watching him, we're all friends with him. He wouldn't do anything that would bring on our wrath, right?"_

 _"Yeah, I guess. He's not like that really."_

 _"I know."_

* * *

Rinoa was happy to help these people out. It didn't take much intelligence or skill to carry boxes around. She lifted the heavy crate until it was nearly over her head and hauled it from one end of the cargo bay to the other. The inertial dampeners on the Ragnarok kept her from feeling even the slightest turn as they drifted through space on their short mission. Her fellow workers lugged boxes back and forth like ants, dressed in their light blue overalls and caps. She was still wearing her sky blue cashmere dress-robe that fluttered behind her. The outfit clashed with the olive green walls of the cargo bay, and especially with the uniform crates as high as her head.

More boxes to carry. One of the workers came up to her. "Tell the captain we need to speed up."

Rinoa nodded and put down the container. She walked towards the back of the bay, dodging the drone-like workers. Weaving up the stairs, past the passenger room and into the cockpit she found the solo captain staring straight ahead, vacantly staring out into the black vast space. Rinoa put her hand on his shoulder. "The cargo bay man says we need to speed up."

"Tell them pe iny morgh mored igoot bare we we'tored baymucaymo argore gh mo spee we't canymore."

Rinoa nodded and left the cockpit. Again she followed the maze-like hallways of the flying ship back down to the bowels of the cargo bay. She opened the door and was all ready to tell the cargo bay manager what the pilot had said. When she stepped in, the bay was empty. She walked further into the hangar, thinking it quite curious the entire crew had left.

"Hello?" she called out as she walked down the compartment's length, looking left and right for anyone hiding behind boxes. Her words echoed against the metal. She turned around and saw a dark purple smoke rolling onto the floor, black mist expanded upwards from the vapor, obscuring the view into the bay. Rinoa thought it might have been a gas leak or something.

A pair of red alien eyes blinked open, peering clearly from the end of the door. Rinoa gasped and stepped back. Her eyes widened and she put a hand to her mouth to stifle the silent gasp. The red eyes stepped forward from the blackness, revealing Squall. He pulled out his gunblade and tore it into the nearest cargo box. The container practically exploded as he sliced it in two. He walked forward, slashing his gunblade back and forth, breaking crates left and right, knocking great stacks down behind him, rustling up the smoke.

Rinoa backed away as Squall moved forward, eyes glowing red with rage. He kicked one stack out that fell behind him into a loud crash. He tore his gunblade downward, breaking another crate into wooden splinters. Rinoa backed up to the hangar door and slumped down in fright, her legs giving out. Squall walked up to her faster than humanly possibly, his shadow encompassing her. His blood-red eyes shone brighter as he raised his gunblade above his head. Rinoa cowered away, holding out her hand feebly in front of her as Squall pulled the blade down.

Then she woke up.

Her eyes shot open, her heart beating like a butterfly. She found herself whimpering like a dog, uncontrollably. But it was just a dream, not reality. The thought of Squall attacking her so brutally replayed over and over in her mind like an echo. And those eyes. Those burning red eyes, dead-set on attacking her.

She turned over and hugged Squall who was sleeping on his side, despite him having attacked her in her dream. She knew that could not be reality. Squall grimaced as his sleep was disturbed. He didn't like being held, and he didn't like his sleep being roused. He turned over and Rinoa did too. She spooned up against him as he draped his hand over her.


	10. Day 10: Wednesday

DAY 10 - WEDNESDAY

"So this is what I've been reduced to," Rinoa thought as she scooped another ladleful of lard into the deep fryer. "It was this or cleaning toilets."

Everything just smelled fattening. She swore she was gaining pounds just from inhaling the kitchen, between the hamburgers and hotdogs, the small squares of chocolate pudding pie, the macaroni and cheese. When you were surrounded by it, it felt like you were knee-deep in grease. Why Zell hadn't chosen to work here was beyond her. God help her if any of her friends saw her like this. She adjusted her hairnet - her ugly, ugly hairnet. It made her hair feel poofy, but that was just because it was all bundled up under a thin mesh.

"Hey, Rinoa," one of the attendants said, "Look alive." She nodded back to the counter. Rinoa looked and saw a student waiting for service there.

"Oh," she stepped away from the deep fryer and approached her. "Can I help you?"

"Yeah, can I get a burger combo?"

Rinoa accessed the part of her brain where the burger combo file was stored. It consisted of a hamburger, fries, fruit, and dessert. "Sure," she said. She took a hamburger patty that was fresh off the grill, put it between two toasted buns and added a piece of lettuce and tomato. Then she grabbed a scoopful of fries and put them next to the plate. Then she grabbed a piece of today's fruit - an apple - and put it on the tray in another square. Next to that she scooped in a slice of the pudding pie. Finished, she handed the tray over the sneeze guard to the student. "Here you go."

"Thanks."

"Thank you."

Wow, she did it. She didn't sneeze on the hamburger. She didn't tip the tray forward and spill it everywhere. She didn't cost the cafeteria 8,000 gil worth of damages. "Hey, I did it!" she said excitedly to the nearby cook.

"Sure you can," she said. "It's not hard. Doing it for fifty years, now that's hard."

"Fifty... years?" Rinoa suddenly pictured herself old and gray, eyes wrinkled shut, hardly being able to see the hamburger she was putting together, feebly handing a tray over to a student saying 'here ya go, sonny'.

She shook her head to clear the image. That was scary.

"Francine," the second cafeteria lady called out to the first one, "I'm taking this down," she said next to a doorway holding a barrel of potatoes nearly as big as her.

"Okay," Francine said. With her gone, she moved over to Rinoa and started collecting and toasting the buns along side her. "Everything you do, you just take it one day at a time," she said to the young woman. "You keep so uptight, you're gonna fail."

"It's just, I'm so afraid of klutzing it up. I tried being a mechanic, a secretary, a nurse, and I always did something to screw it up. I'm afraid I'm gonna poison someone with the lettuce."

"Aw, you can't do that unless you leave it in the sun for too long. And then you can tell pretty easy." She seared the bread with her spatula, creating a sizzling sound. "Your problem is you're trying too hard. You care too much about being able to fit in."

"But I'm not contributing anything to Garden, cause I'm not a SeeD."

"Bull-hockey. I'm not a SeeD and I get to stay here. The faculty gets to stay here. Dr. Kadowaki's not a SeeD and she still contributes. They're part of the team. You may not realize it, but even though you don't have a position, you still have a job."

"What's that?"

"Taking care of Squall."

She cocked her eyes at the lunch lady. "That's not a job."

"No one's gonna take you out of Garden because you're not a SeeD. You did just fine without being one. You earned your place here a hundred times over, and you're keeping it by being with Squall. Squall's the backbone of Garden. He's the one we all look up to when things go wrong. But he can't do it alone. You protect the protector. Under every eagle there's a great wind holding it up." She took the bin of toasted buns off the counter and moved to Rinoa's other side. "I've been here long enough to know everyone here and Squall's got something on his back. And it didn't start until the Selphie thing."

Rinoa's thoughts turned to the marks on his hand. Where was her protection then? She stared at her meat patties. "I've tried getting through to him, but it's just not working. I've never seen him take anything to heart like this."

"See, here's the thing. Squall keeps everything inside him. He cares a lot about his people and friends, and he'll defend them to the death against every little thing that comes in. But personal confrontation." She shook her head disapprovingly. "Can't stand it. He'll just make comments in his head and move on. But those build up until he can't take it."

Rinoa remembered one of the first times they met, at the base of Timber TV tower. They were planning a strategy to stop the broadcast when Squall stopped her to complain about the slapdash methods of her resistance team. Looking back on it now, he didn't yell at her because he hated her, it was because he cared about her. At the time she thought he was being too hard on her. Probably because he was so hard on himself.

Rinoa looked at Francine. "But why this time? He seems more upset than anything I've seen him upset at. It's like he's reverting back to his old self."

"Well, ever since time compression happened, I've noticed he's taken his role as commander more seriously. He was reluctant at first, but now he's thrown himself into his work. That's because during that whole time he felt like he had no control. People were forcing him into decisions and situations and leading him around. Like growing up an orphan, being forced to come to Garden, and then to become Commander, his sister leaving."

"Sister?" Rinoa queried. "Sis? You mean Ellone? How do you know about Ellone?"

"I've been doing this for long enough, I know everybody's stories, Squall's most of all. Anyway, the point is, he never had control and he always desired it. He wants order to the chaos, for things to stay the same, status quo. But then Selphie's problem came along and now he has to deal with that. Things never stay the same. Everyone's changing, growing up, moving onward. When you've seen as many students pass through this cafeteria as I have, you get some perspective."

Wow, Rinoa thought. Sometimes you really get help from the most unlikely of places.

"Hey, Francine, gimme a hand down here," the other cafeteria lady called down from the basement.

"Coming," she called. She took off her gloves and headed for the door. "Can you stir the special sauce?" she told Rinoa as she traipsed down the stairs.

Rinoa nodded and headed over to the big vat on the stove with an oversize serving spoon inside. She pulled the spoon and used all her strength to pull it in the gummy liquid. Ick, it smelled like mayonnaise left in the sun. She brought her arm to face and sniffed. Now she smelled like it too. She didn't think she'd be working here much longer.

* * *

 _Ooh, if the ladies could see me now,_ Irvine commented inwardly as the doctor held the cold disc of the stethoscope up to his chest. If only Dr. Kadowaki was a little thinner... and not so hard-nosed... and attractive... and less than six hundred years old.

Irvine sat shirtless on the rubber check-up bed, waiting for the doctor to finish writing on her sheet. He kicked his legs up and down on the high bed like a little boy. Being partially naked he somehow associated with being energetic. Probably, it was from sports, when he'd play basketball, volleyball, track, etc.

The doctor came back and poked an instrument into his ear. It tickled and itched at the same time. Irvine looked over at the wall inside the doctor's office.

"Nice painting," he commented. "When did you get that?"

"Uh, some time ago," she replied.

"What is it of?"

"I'm not sure," she took out the ear instrument and made some more notes. "All right, your vital signs are all normal. Everything looks good. You look like you're in good physical shape. Good enough for an island vacation."

"Oh, believe me, it's no vacation."

"Oh, don't think I don't know that. I assume there will be a field doctor with you."

"Of course. I have about two weeks of orientation in Trabia before I get shipped out. So I'll get to know everyone real well then."

She began talking as she was writing in her form. Irvine was amazed she could do that, must have been a skill learned from all those years of doctoring. "Did you take your mental aptitude test yet?"

"Yep, nailed it," Irvine answered as he made a fake revolver with his fingers and fired it. "Weirdest test I ever took, too. There weren't even any questions, just a bunch of video games."

"Yeah, those are to test your concentration and alertness."

"I'm sure I passed. After the time compression, everything's gonna be a breeze. They didn't even find any major memory loss issues."

"Not using the GF's?"

"Nope, not going to either, for the mission."

"Really?" she said with concern. "That sounds like a bad idea to me, especially on that island."

"Believe me, I had a long debate with Cid about that. But if Squall can do it, I can do it." He remembered when Squall delivered an announcement to Garden, about six months ago, about how he was going to stop using GF's. As far as the rest of the students were concerned, he decided to let everyone make their own decisions, but that he strongly recommended against it.

Irvine said, "I don't want to lose any memories. Not with everything that's happening to me."

"Ah, yes," the doctor understood. "Well, you just take care of yourself out there."

Irvine put on his shirt. "Hey, I'm a sharpshooter. All you need to do is make sure they don't get close. No need to take out head-on what you can eliminate from three hundred feet." He made another motion as if he had a gun, taking out the jar of tongue depressors.

"You seem overly confident. That might get you killed," she warned, even though she knew that was just part of Irvine's personality.

Irvine said, "Don't say that. If you say bad things, they'll come true." Dr. Kadowaki shrugged in acknowledgment. "Besides, I'm more worried about missing all my friends and Selphie and the baby and losing touch with them. I'm more worried they're gonna forget me."

"Believe me, they won't."

"Aw, I know they won't. And Selphie, well, once the radio gets back up, my kid'll be six months old by then. Maybe he'll be able to make the first world radio broadcast."

"Well, usually babies don't start making cohesive words until nine months."

"Oh. Well, maybe mine'll be special. And Selphie, I'll be able to keep in contact with her when the radio goes up. So it won't be so bad. It's better than it was in history. Communication's evolved so much. It's pretty cool to be a part of it."

Irvine put on his cowboy hat and stood up from the table. "Am I all done?"

"All set," she said.

"Thank you kindly, ma'am. I'll be on my way now." Irvine strutted out of the doctor's office.

"Yippie-kie-yay," the doctor said to herself as she rolled her eyes.

* * *

"Squall, we need to talk."

That was always one of the worst things a man could hear, short of hearing your mother died. His brain froze. It meant he was in trouble, like a little kid, but now he was a little kid who could defend himself. Some of the worst arguments he and Rinoa had had started with 'we need to talk'. Centra fell because of 'we need to talk'.

Squall looked up from his paper slowly as Rinoa sat on the coffee table, concern flooding her eyes. They told Squall she wasn't angry, which was a good thing, in a way. But sometimes her being sad was worse.

"About those cuts on your hands," she said. "I know they didn't come from a funguar," she said quickly as Squall re-raised his paper.

"They're nothing," he said.

"Squall, please, listen to me. I got a call from the train station and -"

He pulled down his paper fast. "The train station called you?"

"They called this number. I just told them you weren't here."

Squall got up to leave the room. Rinoa quick put a hand on his knee to stop him. "Please, no, listen, this isn't an interrogation or anything. I'm not committing you. I just want to know you'll be all right... cause... cause I know if I were in trouble, you'd do the same for me. No matter what the cost. But it's hard to save someone from themselves."

Squall stopped in his tracks and thought, his eyes moving back and forth, showing the wheels turning in his head. He sat back down.

"It was more than a week ago. I haven't felt like doing it since. I'm not gonna do it again. I just felt... something... that I couldn't describe. Like a mix of every emotion. So I lashed out. I had to do it or I felt like I was going to explode. I didn't have any other way to get it out of me. It was just a gut reaction. I didn't know what else to do."

"Is that the only time you've ever done that?"

"Yes."

"So I don't need to inform the psych ward?"

"It was just a high-stress situation."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I'd prefer no one to know. It's my job to be the commander. Garden's rock. And Irvine and Selphie are supposed to be my friends. How would it look for the leaders of Garden to be locked in internal conflict?"

"Sometimes it's good to show your human side too. It inspires confidence in the leader, that he's healthy emotionally. They're looking for mistakes, not emotionality." She put both her hands on his knees. "It's all right to voice your opinion on someone... quietly... to others. We've all been so conflicted about this, you're not alone."

Rinoa wasn't sure if she was getting through. She wanted to hear what Squall really had to say about it, what he was feeling. But his face was as cold as stone.

"All right, so are we cool about this?" he said.

"Yeah, we're cool. One scar is all I need." She gently brushed the bridge of his nose. Rinoa sat up as Squall continued with his paper. She felt somewhat empty, like she hadn't accomplished anything, but she completed something. She walked over to the entrance to the bedroom.

"Rin?" he said.

"Yes," she said from the doorway.

"If it was anyone else... even Quistis or Zell... I wouldn't have said anything."

Rinoa smiled. "Thanks, Squall." In truth, that meant a lot to her. She just wished it could mean a lot to everyone else.

* * *

Quistis took her pointer and moved it to the blinking yellow lights that indicated ships on the blue and green map. "Now, if ships A and B were to move here, and C strafed over here like this, what's wrong with that?" She bent down to the teacher's desk's control panel and programmed the display to show the dots moving to the positions she had pointed out. The dots repeated their movement over and over with a trail of dashes behind. "Zell?"

"Uh..." Zell looked around at his battle theory classmates, they were all focused on the display and writing in their notes, absorbing every bit of information. He looked up at the control panel, trying desperately to decipher the strategy Quistis had put up. "Uh, I don't know."

Quistis sighed. "The ships would be obscured by the wall. That's a blind spot. The cannons would tear them to pieces."

 _Oh, guess so,_ he thought. Quistis bent down to access the next display while Zell wondered why he was still in class. He thought he was done with classes. Didn't he graduate already?

"Let's move on," she said. "So, we move all the ships down, they all conglomerate here, on the shore. What's going to happen first in this scenario?"

 _I should know this,_ Zell thought, _I had a mission just like this._ Quistis looked right at Zell, while others raised their hands. He knew she was ready to call on him, and he anxiously formulated a quick answer. "Soren?" she called out.

"Ship C gets wiped out before they have a chance."

"Right. That would result in unacceptable losses. So where should we move to? Zell?"

 _Acck, why is she calling on me for everything?_

"Uh, spread out the ships more? Maybe move 'em away from the beach... then they can all rappel up the cliff?"

Quistis shook her head sadly. "No, Zell, you'd move around the island for cover and then thrust forward like an arrow."

Zell stuck out his bottom lip and cringed his hands. _Aw, man, I knew that. I'm suckin' it down, I'm gonna fail if I keep this up._

"Zell, are you paying attention?" she yelped.

Zell sat straight up in his seat and nodded. "Uh, yes."

Quistis depressingly looked down at the ground, and then up at the clock. The period was nearly over. "Well, all right, for next time, do pages 84 through 86 in your text book and start reading the chapter on division of resources." Students started causing a racket with the gathering of their bags and shuffling out of the room. "Zell," she said clearly over the din, "I want to see _you_ after class."

Eep. Zell swallowed and hesitantly started to stand up from his desk.

"No," she commanded. "You stay there."

Zell fell back in his chair. He was really worried now. It's not like it was his fault. He didn't know what was wrong with him. Maybe he was just having a bad day. After the last of the students had left she warmly approached his desk.

"Zell, you seemed distracted today. Is anything wrong?"

Zell shrugged no.

Quistis walked back to the front of the room and leaned up against her desk, looking at Zell. "Maybe you need to study after school." She began traipsing her fingers up her pale pink vest. She rubbed the space between her breasts up and down lightly.

"Uh, sure... that'd be... cool," Zell stuttered, staring at her hand. What in the world was she doing?

Quistis took the zipper at the top of her clothes and tugged down slowly. She pulled her arms back and her vest just flowed off of her. Her skirt melted away to the floor. She was now wearing leather straps wrapped around her thighs. Her leather boots were studded up each side, as well as her leather panties with a zipper down the middle. And she had a push-up bra making her chest seem twice its size with rivets where the...

Zell swallowed, his brow beading into a cold sweat. Quistis scowled in a devilish manner and strapped a riding whip to her hand.

"You're going to have to perform a make-up test, Mr. Dincht."

Zell's eyes widened enough to fall out of his head. He heard mumbles at his left and looked. The Trepies were hooting and hollering from the corner.

"Yeah! All right, Quistis!"

"Beat that bad boy! Beat him!"

"He's been naughty!"

Zell was frozen in his seat. Quistis started walking up to him very slowly, putting one foot in front of the other, a seductive smirk plastered on her face. Zell was practically shivering-

-Zell opened his eyes and saw the blackness fluttering from his pupils dilating too quickly. He looked around and saw he was back in his own room. The red digits on the alarm clock told him he had just been sleeping.

He sat up in bed and rubbed his forehead. "I've been thinking about girls too much." What a weird dream.

He plopped back down on the pillow and cradled it under his arms. Next time, he thought, he'd have fewer hot dogs before he went to bed.


	11. Day 11: Thursday

DAY 11 - THURSDAY

*knock, knock*

Rinoa tapped lightly on the already open door. A twilight hue from the not-too-bright desk lamp bathed the room in deep orange. It was barely light enough to read by. She poked her head in between the door and doorway. "Hello?"

Edea Kramer was almost invisible in the darkness, with her black clothes and long black hair. She was waiting with her hands clasped, sitting on the edge of the bed, a kind patient smile on her face.

"Hi, Mrs. Kramer," Rinoa said as she stepped into the room. Squall and the others called her Matron, the rest of the world called her Sorceress, Cid called her Edea. Rinoa had thought a long time about what to call her when they finally met.

Edea politely nodded in greeting. "Hi, Rinoa. It's good to see you again."

Rinoa looked around nervously at the guest room she was in, back and forth between the still life painting and the walnut desk at the other end of the room. Both were rather hard to see. "Boy, it sure is dark in here," Rinoa said apprehensively. "Do you mind if I turn on a light?" she pointed to the switch for the ceiling light, about to flip it.

"I'd prefer if you didn't," she said softly. Rinoa was a surprised that she refused her simple request. Why wouldn't she want more light? "You can turn on the desk lamp, though, if you want."

Rinoa figured her ability to see her face was a bit more important than Edea's comfort. It might have seemed selfish, but she couldn't take talking to a disembodied voice. It felt like an intimate restaurant in here. She walked over to the desk and turned on the reading lamp on top of the shelf. It added a bit more warm ginger light to the room, not much, but enough to be able to make out Edea's fine motherly features in her pale skin.

"Ah," Rinoa said with feigned relief, while Edea looked her warmly. "That's better." She paused, wondering what to do with her arms. She held them behind her back and rocked forward. "I just came down to say hi, while you were visiting." Edea slightly nodded. Rinoa scratched her temple. "Man, this is awkward," she said and let out an equally awkward laugh. They were two people that used to be so far apart in distance and in alignment, now brought together very close.

"Well, I'm glad you could make it down," Edea smiled.

"I really don't know you as well as I'd like to, given that I'm going out with Squall, and you're the closest thing to his mother there is. I figured I should take the opportunity, you know?"

Edea nodded. "I agree. I would like to get to know you better as well. I'd like to find out who was so able to tame the lion."

Rinoa let out a nervous laugh, "Yeah, so... but I was always afraid, because... you know... all the other stuff. Like trying to kill me and imbuing me with sorceress powers." She tried to say that as humorously as possible.

She returned a smile. "I understand. And how is your relationship with Squall?"

"Uhhhhh," she uttered as she rubbed the back of her head and looked away. "Stressed. I guess. But we've gone through plenty of rough times and managed to make it out, so I'm not too worried. This is just a dry spell."

"Is he treating you well?"

"Oh yeah, no complaints there. I'm not worried about that." Rinoa's tension was easing by the second. This was such a different woman than what she was used to, that veiny scary woman with the rising sun headdress. The real Edea was more likable.

"You seem like you have something on your mind," Edea said. She was even more perceptive.

"Well, who doesn't these days," she held her palm up like 'what can you do?'. "You know all of us. We're all concerned about Selphie and Irvine. The girls are especially worried about Selphie. And I figured since you were like a mother to her too, you'd know best. Do you think she's marrying him for the right reasons? Is she going to have a successful marriage with him? Because I'm afraid it's going to change her."

"Of course it's going to change her," Edea said gently. "Life is change. You can't help that."

"Well, yeah, but I mean, I'd rather her not marry Irvine and raise the baby alone, or single, than risk getting into a loveless marriage." Rinoa felt like she was taking a risk saying that, even though her words would never go beyond these walls. She'd grown up in such an environment and knew the devastation that occurred, so the last thing she wanted was to see it happen again. But she was sure that opinion wasn't going to be popular among her friends, so she kept it to herself until now.

Rinoa continued, "I think she'd go back and change it, if she could. If she knew this was going to happen, I don't think she would have gotten on the train. She would have changed it."

"Perhaps, but what's done is done. And we can't change what happened before."

"Yeah, that is true," Rinoa said, scratching her head, not really understanding the remark. "So you think Selphie's doing the right thing?"

"I didn't say that. But I trust Selphie's judgment to do what's best." She turned her tranquil gaze from Rinoa to the floor, with a slight smile on her face. "I took a risk too, you know. As a sorceress."

Rinoa nodded, feeling the light of insight flood her brain. She was talking to a former sorceress, a kindred spirit. "Yeah, you did."

"I knew the risk of being possessed by Ultimecia. I knew before I met Cid. I told him everything that could happen. And Cid loved me enough to destroy me if he needed to." She turned back up to Rinoa's face. "The best thing you can do right now is be there for her. Be supportive. Remember, she's the one at the center of all this. You're watching from the outside."

"Yeah, I guess," Rinoa nodded, genuinely understanding this time. "This is going to change her, isn't it?"

"A baby changes everything. But that's life."

A bright ring intoned, coming from the phone on the nightstand. Neither were startled. Edea reached over and picked it up. "Hello?... I don't know. Hang on, Rinoa's here." She turned to Rinoa. "Do you know where Squall is?"

Rinoa gave a shrug and a headshake.

She turned back to the phone. "No, she doesn't know either, why?... Irvine's looking for him? Why?"

* * *

 _"Tickets, have your tickets ready." The female train worker up ahead repeated her line again and again. Irvine and Selphie slowly shuffled ahead in the line, barely making any progress at all. This was probably the worst time of the year to get on a train, but Irvine only had so much leave, and less time to do it in. He didn't mind so much._

 _Selphie was looking down over the railing at the train tracks below. The strange detail of the rails from so far up was fascinating to her, analyzing the rusted girders mixed with white soda cups and papers people had thrown down there._

 _"You remembered your package, right?" Selphie asked._

 _"Yes. That's the third time you asked me that," Irvine smiled. "It's safe in my bag." He patted his luggage for emphasis._

 _Selphie laughed. "Just don't want you to forget it." She stood in between the metal rods of the railing and hung over the side. "It'll be nice to see Deling City again. All the pretty lights and arches, and the buses."_

 _"Yeah, I figured I'd better take this opportunity to see my Galbadia friends before I ship out."_

 _Irvine was delivering a necklace for his friends' mother's birthday. His friend had contacted Irvine some time ago, asking him to pick it up. Apparently its type was only made in Balamb._

 _"Where'd you find it?" Selphie asked. "The necklace, I mean."_

 _"A junk shop, actually. It was a custom job."_

 _"What's it look like?"_

 _"Well, it's kind of a ... imagine one of those hollow heart-shaped loops with a sapphire pendant hanging down in it."_

 _"Ooh, that'd be cool."_

 _"I'll show it to you when we get on the train."_

 _Selphie stuck her foot out through the bars, maintaining her balance. "It was real nice of you to get that for him. And then travel all the way to Galbadia to give it to him." Most people didn't understand why he was spending so much on this present, and then taking the time to travel all the way over there to deliver it._

 _"Yeah, it wasn't terribly convenient, but I haven't seen him for a long time. You didn't need to come along though. I don't have a problem with it, I mean. It's just, you don't know these people either."_

 _"Well, it's not like I had anything to do. Otherwise, it'd just be another boring weekend correcting homework. Plus I've never met any of your friends."_

 _"Okay, but if you hear anyone call me Irv the Perv, just let it slide."_

 _"Oh, really?" she put her hands on her hips. "And how did you get that nickname?"_

 _"No need to know - just let it slide."_

 _She made a cocky smile at him. When Selphie had told others she'd be going on this trip, it met with less than stellar opinions: 'Why? Why would you go with him?', 'You don't even know these people', 'You're not dating Irvine anymore', 'I'm worried about what's going to happen'. Selphie wondered if they knew they were still sleeping together, despite not being committed in a relationship. She herself was worried about it, but she knew she liked it. Or rather she wouldn't like it if Irvine left her. That didn't make her a slut, she was still a one-man girl. Irvine was the first boy she'd been with, but he was good and she liked him by her side. She forgave him for not being able to commit. It was the sacrifice she had to make for them to be together. Maybe Irvine's lack of commitment was just a smokescreen he put up for himself, to make believe they really weren't going out so he could still keep his available reputation. If that was what it took to keep him, she could maintain that._

 _Her friends had to suspect them though, wonder about what their relationship was about, whether they were technically together or not. It undoubtedly made it back to the others that they were still sleeping together. But it was like nothing had changed really. And they were probably talking behind her back about a lot of things, but she didn't care. She just wanted to be with Irvine._

 _"You got your ticket ready?" she said as she noticed there were only two people ahead of them. Irvine dug into his long tan coat and found his permission to board the train just as he stepped up to the lady in the conductor's uniform._

 _"Tickets, please."_

 _"Here you go, ma'am." He handed her up the ticket, which she punched. "We're in the SeeD cabin, in case you need to check on us."_

 _Selphie gave him a gentle whap on his head, nearly dislodging his hat. The woman smirked and handed back his ticket. Irvine boarded the train and Selphie followed soon after._

 _"Would you stop flirting for crying out loud," she said._

 _"Heh, I can't help it, it's my nature. The life of a SeeD is lonely. You gotta make friends in every town."_

 _"You live here!"_

 _"I know." Irvine shifted his eyebrows playfully. Selphie rolled her eyes and elbowed him. He inserted the ticket into the slot next to the door. The entry shifted open, allowing them access to the luxuriant SeeD car. Selphie bolted to the windows, while Irvine took his time and sauntered in. She looked back at him. Things between them were awkward since that one night... and yet they weren't. He treated her just the same as he did in the beginning. He was still the same smooth, funny, charming guy he always was. Despite the awkwardness, he was still casual around her. Everything just seemed to roll off him. She wished she could be like that, instead of stressed to the point of hyperactivity, strung out between all these activities she was doing._

 _"Hurry up, the train's about to start. I wanna see it pull out."_

 _Irvine rolled his eyes at her train-o-philia. Just as he came up behind her the train started chugging along, slowly moving its great mass forward onto the rails. Selphie waved at all the anonymous faces seeing them off._

 _"Woo-hoo, here we go."_

 _The train gathered up speed and emerged from the train station. The sunlight poured on them, contrasting with the dank, sheltered, industrialized station. The countryside of Balamb welcomed them, zipping past like a picture on a roll, ever-repeating. The natural repetition played itself over and over again, like the world's most boring movie._

 _"Man, if only cars could go this fast," Irvine commented idly, breaking the silence._

 _"I know. Think of how much power this train has to have to pull all this weight."_

 _Silence again as they watched the dry landscape go past. The natural scenery was beautiful, albeit tedious and lackluster. It wasn't any different from what they could see at home, just moving. An occasional tree passed by. A forest slowly slunk along the horizon, towered over by the mountains. Hills rolled like a sine wave past them._

 _"I'm bored," Irvine said._

* * *

Squall walked out onto Balamb Harbor.

The air held the salty spray of the ocean in suspension. He could taste it when he licked his lips. The ocean was especially torrential today, probably an incoming front. Buildings lined him on the left, empty of the trucks that used to park there. All but one was stationed at the end of the pier. Very few people were on the harbor today. It was unusually vacant, almost eerie.

And there was Fujin and Raijin walking towards him, oblivious of his presence as of yet. They were each carrying a bucket of fish, swinging them back and forth as they walked with smiles on their faces. Fujin pushed Raijin aside playfully, assumably for something stupid he said. Seifer pulled up the rear, still wearing that old gray military trenchcoat he always wore. Except now he had replaced his black cross t-shirt for a white corduroy sleeveless smeared with dirt, and carried a fishing pole over his shoulder.

"Hey, Squall," Raijin said excitedly upon spotting him. "Squall, it's me, Raijin, ya know?" He held his hand to his chest, pointing himself out.

"HELLO!"

"Raijin, Fujin," he nodded to them courteously. They stood between him and the man he really wanted to see. They were the posse, just guardians of the one he came down here for. Seifer returned his gaze over the tops of their heads.

Raijin said, "Ain't seen you down on the docks much, ya know. You're missin' all the good times. Seifer caught an eel today."

"SCARE," Fujin said. She had a unique way of speaking that told more what she represented than coherent sentences. It was amazing. They were talking to him as if nothing had ever happened. Like they had forgotten all the battles, the attacks, the wars.

"Ya, it freaked Seifer out, ya know. Don't think he's ever seen one before."

"Boys," Seifer said, breaking up the conversation. He handed his bucket to Raijin, keeping his stare on Squall. "Why don't you take today's catch to the shop. I'll meet up with you later."

"Oh, okay," he said. Raijin grabbed his bucket and walked with Fujin down an alley in between the shacks.

"Well," Seifer said as he put his tackle box on the ground, "It's been about, what, a year?"

"Since a little after time compression."

"Really? The only time you've come down here to see me was to check up on me to see if I still had aspirations of world domination. Of my romantic dream." He looked down at his shirt stained with fish refuse. "Well, it's not exactly the glorious life, but this is what I need right now. I've traded in my gunblade for a fishing pole." He held it up. "It's a far cry from being the Sorceress' Knight. Yeah, like some famous person said, you never go out with a bang, only with a whimper."

"Ain't that the truth."

Seifer put a hand on his hip. "Well, listen to you. Making smart-alecky comments. I've always been curious about your opinion of me. Tell me, do you think I was reduced to a fisherman or was too high as a Sorceress' Knight."

Squall remained silent, reserving his judgment.

Seifer smirked. "We really are too much alike, you know that. We're two sides of the same coin." He pointed to the bridge of his nose. "You couldn't stand to be the only one with a scar so you gave me one of my own. Sometimes I wonder how you ever managed to beat me. Well, not sometimes. All the time."

"You're trying to goad me into a fight. It won't work."

"Squally," he raised his arms wide, "I've given up fighting. I'm only goading you cause I never get the chance anymore."

"I didn't come here to get a tongue-lashing."

"No? Then why did you come here? Not the Selphie thing, is it? I'd like to think you were made of sterner stuff than that."

"You know about Selphie?"

"Oh, yes, she came down here. Quite a surprise. Asked me for some advice about how to deal with all the whispers and sighs behind her back. I don't think she wanted a real answer though, I think she just needed to know there was someone out there who just didn't care what she did." He laughed at the irony. "I know why she came down here. But why you? Would you really come to me for advice?"

"What makes you think I came down here for advice?"

"What did I just say? We're two sides of the same coin. Didn't a famous strategist once say 'know thy enemy'? I know how you work, Squall. I've had a year to think about it. To think about you and why you're there," he pointed far off in the distance to the towering Garden. "And why I'm here. Selphie said I'm the person who wouldn't pull any punches when it came to counsel. That's the same reason you're here. I'm your only equal. We're rivals. We grew up in Garden together, we use the same weapon. We even had the same girlfriend." Squall scowled further at the mention of Rinoa. "Boy, this Selphie thing sure does have you tied in knots. You've got no one else to talk to, nowhere else to go but here."

Seifer flicked his gray sleeve out and put his fingers to his temple. "Well, let me use my psychic powers to divine what you want. Cause that's the only way to get anything out of those tight lips." He closed his eyes and hummed. "Ah yes, it's all coming clear. Hmm, you... want to know... what you should do because you're torn between being a commander of Garden and being a person." He put his fingers down and let his words stew in Squall for a moment. "Am I right? The commander in you needs to be impartial, to view them as soldiers, while the person inside you wants to rip their lungs out."

"I'm not angry with them."

"No? Then why did you blow up at Selphie in front of the entire quad? You used to love them, but they've gone and done something stupid, so now you don't know what to feel. You don't want to admit you're human like the rest of us. I bet you've thought over and over how much they've ruined their lives, their careers in SeeD. Jeez, I've never met anyone as career-oriented as you, except for myself."

"Does this have a point? Or do I need to go to Raijin for the short version?" Squall said acerbically.

"Listen up, Squally, you might learn something here. When are you gonna realize that not everyone lives their life like you want them to. Not everyone needs what you need. What, do you expect all your friends to become commanders same as you? Commanders of eight Gardens? Not everyone wants the life you have, Squall. They're not gonna be SeeDs for life, they have to grow into something."

"You can't tell me Selphie wanted this."

Seifer shrugged. "Not everyone's life plans are actually planned."

"Selphie had a future ahead of her. She wanted a life as a SeeD."

"Oh, come on, look at her. Does she really look like SeeD material? She's so little and hyper."

"No one worked harder than she did, no one cared more about the people around her. She was going to be a great SeeD. She could've gone into demolitions or mechanics-"

"She was a messenger girl! Squall, she was little, she was unpredictable. Was there ever a gap in something that she really filled?"

"Stop talking about her in the past tense like she's dead!"

"You were the one who was doing it!"

Squall clenched his fist as he returned himself to a calm state.

Seifer looked back at him. "Jeez, you really are upset about this, aren't you? You barely have control of your senses. Hah! If I'd only known Squall's weak spot was his friends." He shook his head with a strangely sadistic smile on his face. "What I don't understand is why you're so upset about this. You don't even know her that well. You've only known both of them for a year, even. Selphie's from Trabia, Irvine's from Galbadia. It's not like Zell or Quistis who you grew up with."

"We were all orphans together."

"Excluding that distant memory. But you never went to classes with them, you never bumped into them in the cafeteria, never saw them sneaking out after curfew, never learned with them, never fought with them. Still, all that aside, it's not your life, it's not your decision. You're not the one who's pregnant. You're not the one who's getting married and shipping out. This doesn't affect you or your life's path. They're your friends, can't you just let them live?"

"I still care about them. I'm still close to them. Their actions do affect all of us."

"Then what? Is it regret? Is it that you wished you could have done something to prevent this? Honestly, Squall, I'm doing all the work here. At least try a little."

"I knew everything that was going on, either through Rinoa or somebody else. I knew they were having sex, they weren't in a relationship, and I didn't think they were using protection. I knew, but I didn't say anything because it wasn't my business. It's not like I could force them to take the pill. It would have been..."

"Awkward. Ironically, they weren't using birth control, just the pull-out method. Irvine doesn't believe in it, apparently. So you were right about that."

Seifer didn't think it was possible, but Squall scowled even deeper and clenched his fists tighter. Despite his outward anger he quietly said, "It's not my place to get involved in their personal lives."

"And you were right. As a commander. But as a friend, you're torn. You had the power, but it wasn't your relationship. So you just watched them play with fire. You feel a sort of survivor's guilt."

"Don't dictate to me what I think and feel. You think you're like me, but you're not."

"Sorry, Squall. These aren't opinions, these are facts. Fishing gives you a lot of free time to think about people. You've always had a problem accepting the truth when it's right in front of your face. Sis leaving. Rinoa being a sorceress. Her loving you. You loving her. Your friends must be very loyal to put up with you for so long. Especially with the way you treat them in a delicate situation. Even after you tore Selphie to pieces. And your buddy Irvine-"

"Irvine is not my friend." He thought of what Seifer had said and put it up against everything else he knew - Irvine doesn't believe in birth control. "My friend wouldn't do what he did to someone, to another one of my friends."

"It takes two to tango, Squally."

"Their lack of responsibility is unbecoming of SeeDs."

"Hmm, you know what? I can't disagree with that. But people are people, and unfortunately, the stupid stuff they do, we really can't do anything about. We can't all be as good as you. Well, Squall," he picked up the tackle box he'd put on the ground. "I can't say I envy your role right now. But it should be interesting to see. My posse's waiting for me at the shop. Do tell me how the wedding goes."

Seifer gleefully turned around and walked down the alley in between two brown houses with a bridge overhead.

In spite of all the encounters they'd had, of all the victories, Squall felt like he had just lost to Seifer in the biggest battle of all. He had all the answers to all the questions before he himself did. That made him feel inferior, like dirt. Like he was all brawn and no brains, just a soldier not able to think for himself. Seifer was happy and Squall wasn't. He was in turmoil over this situation and Seifer shrugged it off like water. He still had his ego, but this time it felt like he'd earned it through his humble servitude, so it didn't matter. Anger seethed within him, flowing through his clenched veins, eager to get out.

Seifer had one-upped him all the time. He came here looking for answers, and he got them and more than he asked for. And finding out that Irvine didn't use birth control of his own volition was the icing on the cake. He really felt like kicking them out of SeeD now. But of course, that would just make it all the more worse for them, and it wasn't technically grounds for discharge.

"SQUALL!"

Just as Squall turned around to go back to Garden he saw Irvine walking down the cobblestone ramp to the harbor, his fists swinging wildly. "Stay right there!" he called out.

Irvine looked angry. Something about the way he was walking told Squall that a fight was coming towards him. Enough conflicts and you start to grow an instinct for threats. Despite the cowboy hat shadowing his head, Squall could see his boyish face covered with an irate frown. His ponytail swung back and forth as he made giant steps, closing the gap between them. "I've got a bone to pick with you," he pointed and stood in something like a battle stance when he got there.

Squall brought himself up to his full height, ready to take anything he could dish out.

"Did you call my Selphie a whore?"

"What?" Squall's eyes went wide at this leftfield accusation. He'd apparently come all the way from Garden down here just to ask him that.

"Selphie just told me everything you did. You've got a lot of nerve Squall, humiliating her in front of the entire quad like that."

"I never called her a whore."

"But you meant everything you said there, didn't you?"

Squall thought about whether he did mean it. He meant it at the time, he might still mean it now, but he would never say it, especially like that. If he said he didn't mean it now, would that negate the message he had wanted to send?

None of this mattered. Irvine was antagonizing him, and the last thing he needed after Seifer dressed him down was someone below him dressing him down. He started walking back towards Garden, moving diagonally. Irvine quickly side-stepped in front of him, blocking his path.

"I'm not done with you yet," he yelled out.

Squall glowered at him. "I didn't call her a whore. I only said what everybody else is thinking."

"But you didn't have to do it in a way that made her cry in a corner of the training center. You never had any tact, did you?"

"I may not have tact, but at least I've got the intelligence to think ahead, you moron."

Irvine narrowed his eyes. "Say that again," he said slowly and menacingly.

"You think you're doing something noble by doing some romantic sorceress war shit by getting her pregnant and marrying her right before you go into battle where you might die. If you were a real man you'd quit the mission this second and start on a long, hard path to providing a future for your baby."

"I can't quit. Didn't Cid tell you that? The mission's too important."

"Bullshit. Everyone can quit. Fake a damn stomachache if you have to. But you could do something. You're going to be gone for eighteen months. You're going to miss almost all of the first year of your baby's life. What are you gonna do, parent by Polaroid? Christ, you knew, you knew you were getting shipped off before... You knew and you still couldn't control yourself. I can't even hope you die on the field because then Selphie won't have anyone to help her."

"That's enough. It was a mistake, all right? But this is the best thing we can do now. We've done it and we can't undo it. Like you're the perfect son. Remember all the controversy about letting you and Rinoa live together in the same room?"

"Yeah, I remember. I remember it was unfounded, because we actually loved each other and acted like it, and acted responsibly. There's a difference between us and you, and you know it. You were in support of Rinoa staying with me," Squall suddenly remembered. "It's a good thing we didn't make that a Garden-wide rule, otherwise who knows how many mothers Garden would have now."

"How dare you. You strut around Garden like you're perfect-"

"This isn't about me, this is about you. Nobody's perfect, but they don't make stupid decisions. Don't you realize you've disappointed everybody?"

"Hey, the last thing I need is you acting like my father."

"Don't you see? That's exactly the point. The last thing we need is another kid as screwed up as us. We didn't have parents growing up and look how messed up we are."

"I think you're the only one who's messed up, screaming at a girl who's in an extremely vulnerable state."

"Oh, yeah, let's talk about vulnerability. Let's talk about taking advantage of people. How Selphie was die-hard in love with you and you used it to get your way with her. At least that wouldn't have been so bad except for a little thing called birth control. It's a nice little thing we use when we don't want to get pregnant. And the pull-out method does not count. I don't care how it feels. You don't have a choice. You use the condom or you keep your goddamn dick in your pants."

"My god, Squall, you really don't have any boundaries, do you? Are you going to air out all our personal laundry?"

"Everyone already knows, like I said. I'm just the only one saying it. I'm only trying to get you to see the big picture. You're acting like you're a real couple, like you're supposed to be happy together in wedded bliss. It's obvious you don't love each other."

"Listen," Irvine said as he pointed in a threatening manner. "You can shit on me all you want, just stay away from Selphie. Hey, all right, maybe marrying her wasn't my first choice on my list of things to do, but I do care about her and I'm in love with this baby. I have been looking forward to being a father since I was ten."

"You didn't have long to wait."

"Maybe this is too fast, maybe this isn't the best thing for either of us, but it's what's best for the baby. That's all that matters now, that's the only thing I thought about when I decided to stay on the mission. It's the only thing on my mind and I'm not gonna let you destroy it."

Squall said, "I'm not trying to destroy it, I'm trying to get you to wake up and stop pretending. Both of you."

Irvine said, "Hey, I care about Selphie just as much as any of us. But I've lost all respect for you."

Squall said, "You're worthless. You think you're an evolved human, but you're no better than an animal. I don't even want to see you get married, it's too disgusting to think that this 'happy celebration' is the result of two horny kids. This is not a child out of love, but lust. That's the foundation for your family, I hope you realize that. What's gonna happen when your kid looks up at you with his innocent eyes and asks 'Mommy? Daddy? How was I born?' and you tell him he was conceived in a train car on the way to Galbadia from casual sex by a couple of people still working on their careers, not married, and too stupid to realize the consequences of their actions."

"You are one step away from becoming a floor stain!" Irvine yelled.

That didn't matter to Squall. He was not about to show mercy, now that he had come this far. "All right, then you can respond with the short version - you were an accident! You were never meant to be born. You weren't supposed to be here. And because of your existence, you've forever changed and ruined the lives of dozens of people and given your parents a living hell."

"That's it. I'm gonna shut your face for you." He reached into his coat pocket for his rifle.

Squall whipped out his gunblade and held it ready before Irvine had even pulled his gun out. "Don't even try it."

"Fine," Irvine said as he took off his long coat. "You want a piece of me, why don't you fight me like a real man." He held up his fists to his face.

Squall dropped his gunblade, which clattered on the ground, and unfastened his ammo belts from his waist. "Fine, but what does that make you?"

That was the last straw. Irvine lunged forward and jumped on Squall, losing his hat in the process. They fell and began grappling, tumbling end over end on the road, each trying to assert the other on the bottom. They were both using their SeeD training, but neither thought they'd ever have to use it on another SeeD. A crowd started gathering around them, watching the fight and calling others over.

Squall kicked Irvine off him and stood back up. Irvine did the same and they clashed like rams, interlocking arms and heads. They both gritted their teeth at each other and groaned, shoving each other back and forth. Squall managed to tear Irvine's arms away from his, but the cowboy headbutted him in the forehead. Squall staggered back, holding his hand to his face, as Irvine pulled his fist behind him to throw a haymaker punch. The commander bared his teeth like a lion as he ducked under the punch and swung back with a diagonal uppercut, then hit him in the stomach with his elbow. Irvine's eyes bulged from the blow. He took a step back and spun into a side kick to Squall's head.

The crowd now encircled them, making an arena for them to fight in. They started cheering, not for any particular winner, just for entertainment. The two traded punches back and forth, barely making a mark on their tough hides. Squall pushed Irvine back, he fell into the barrier of people, splayed out. The crowd shoved him back in, like rubber ropes.

"Eurugh!" Irvine grunted as he dived for Squall's shoulder. The commander easily stepped aside, but Irvine grabbed his arm and pulled it behind his back in a hold. Squall yelped in pain as Irvine twisted.

"Give up?" the cowboy said.

Squall's anger at this humiliation gave him strength. He twisted back, breaking out of the hold, and grabbed Irvine's head. He was about to make a point-blank blow when Irvine slipped out and tackled him around the waist. They flew backward and before they barreled through the crowd, Squall used his inertia to turn around, then fell backwards and flipped Irvine over him. He landed hard on the road, smacking his head on the stone ground.

"Uhhhhlll," Irvine moaned, prone on the rocks.

Squall made an attempt to stand but the core of his body was feeling the hard effects of Irvine's tackle. He collapsed to his hands and knees on the bumpy surface, behind Irvine's head and started making odd noises as he tried to get air back into his lungs, drooling.

"Oh, man, I'm seeing stars," Irvine said dazily.

"Aaacck," Squall uttered between breaths. "Me too." He spat out excess saliva. "Well... that's... one thing... we can... agree on..."


	12. Day 12: Friday

DAY 12 - FRIDAY

Dr. Kadowaki yanked the tape around Squall's side and pulled it over to the other. Squall held up his arms to let her through, wincing a bit from the rough treatment. He thought she was going awful fast for a caretaker. The tape wasn't exactly going neatly around his torso. Plus she looked rather cross. She yanked the roll one more time and snapped off the tape.

"Ow, careful," Squall said.

"Careful? Squall Leonhart, I have better things to do in this infirmary then to tape up your self-destructive body. Getting into a fight with Irvine, right before his wedding. If you had bloodied Irvine's face at all I would have never forgiven you."

"Look, I'm the commander of this Garden. What I do is not-"

"Oh, listen to yourself. Stop acting like a soldier and start acting like a human being. If you were a soldier, you wouldn't have any friends. A soldier's job is to battle and you're damned more lucky than that. I'm surprised Irvine's still invited you to the wedding at all. Someone up there favors you, I imagine. Far more than me."

Squall shut up. For all the teetering on the edge of duty and friendship he had been doing, it had caused him nothing but strife. His friends were angry with him. He was angry with his friends. And there was no way he wanted to lose what he had already gained.

"Here." The doctor handed him a bottle of pills. "Now get out of my office." Dr. Kadowaki turned around and sat at her desk, working on papers, pretending Squall was no longer there. Squall was heated at being disregarded like this. He looked at the bottle of painkillers that rattled in his hand, dumbfounded at being practically thrown out. Every stupid thing he had done just alienated people further from him. _I haven't felt like myself since this whole thing started. It's just been a big conflict this whole time. I had to pay for a train car I trashed. Rinoa was worried about me. I yelled at Selphie. Irvine and I beat the crap out of each other. I asked for advice from Seifer, what was I thinking?_

"I'm sorry," Squall said.

The doctor turned her head to him. "I'm not the one you should be apologizing to."

"I know. It's just been a rough couple of days. Not that I'm making excuses. And I know I haven't had it the roughest out of any of us." He held up his pills to the light. "But of all my time here at Garden, this has probably been my biggest challenge - just knowing how to act."

"Well, SeeDs are all about meeting challenges head-on."

"Yeah, and I haven't been doing that."

"You know, Irvine thought about making you his best man."

"Really?"

The doctor nodded. "But he was afraid to ask you, seeing as you two weren't that close."

Squall thought about that. "Guess I see why now. After what I said about him being my friend. Or lack thereof."

"Squall, I'm not the one you should be talking to. I'm not your counselor. I don't have a degree in psychology."

"Yeah... maybe we should get one. A Garden counselor."

"You're the commander, Commander. I'd certainly like it, it'd keep people from yammering on about their problems. Just don't take it out of my pay."

Squall smiled, the first time for a while. "Wedding's tomorrow," he sighed. "I think I got some work to do."

"You certainly do, Squall."

Squall tossed up the pill bottle and caught it playfully, jumped down from the bed and walked out. The doctor watched him leave out of the corner of her eye.

"Of all the times I've patched up that boy, now he finally decides to make peace."

* * *

"Did I pack my hairbrush?"

"Get that box lifted on there. No, there!"

"All you all right, headmaster?"

"Ow, my foot."

"Hurry now, the train's about to leave."

"Has anyone seen my dress? I just want to make sure it got packed away."

"I'm hungry."

"When are we supposed to get there?"

"Put all the presents into this trunk."

"Mine's too big."

"It's supposed to be overnight non-stop."

"Quick, I'm trying to find out if the flowers are here yet."

The train station was bustling like Winter Festival. People both known and unknown were whizzing by him, trying to get everything found and on the train in a timely manner. Squall stood at the center of this tornado, waiting patiently to get on the train. He had no supplies to carry, save what he had in his bag. It was everyone else's show. He had no real desire to plan the wedding, and everyone else did, so why not let them have their fun. Cid and Edea were also together in the middle of the flurry, looking like wizened grandparents, trying to help out when they could, making sure all the belongings were on the train. The younger generation was doing most of the work though. If they weren't SeeDs, they probably wouldn't have been able to make these exceptions - this hurried train ride, the reservations in Galbadia. But saving the world has its perks.

Squall watched his friends lift a large trunk into the car. Despite everything that they went through they were still remarkably normal people. They weren't uplifted onto pedestals by the people for destroying the threat of the Sorceress, they weren't corrupted by fame and fortune. A lot of people who did the same thing would be carrying that around like a ton of bricks, using it to get more than they deserved.

Quistis came up beside him. "Penny for your thoughts," she said.

"I was just thinking how much we've managed to stay the same through all we've been through."

"I need to pee! Hurry up!" Selphie shouted in the melee.

"The same... for us," Squall amended.

"Shouldn't you be helping?" Quistis asked.

"I just helped Zell load a big box of something onto the train, taking a rest." He said as he rubbed his arms.

"Are you staying in Galbadia?" she asked.

"No. Leaving the next day. Rinoa's coming with me."

"Ah, commander duties?"

"Something like that."

Another voice pierced their conversation. "Careful! Those are the presents."

"Oh yeah, I wanted to ask, what did you get for a present?" Quistis asked.

"Knives."

"Knives?"

"It was Rinoa's idea."

"Really? I would have expected that from you."

"What? Me? Why? Oh." Squall looked absent-mindedly at the gunblade on his belt. "Rin thought of it before I did." He shrugged. "What did you get her?"

"A crystal bowl."

"Hm, she's gonna have a lot of kitchen supplies."

"Quistis! We need you now!" Selphie shouted.

"Coming!" Quistis ran off to what was probably something unimportant.

Quistis used to have a crush on him, about a year ago, right before he graduated and she was decommissioned as a teacher. He rejected her advances harshly, more harshly than was necessary, and she stepped back. Now there was no awkwardness whatsoever. She didn't even feel the need to say goodbye, because she knew they'd be seeing each other again. It was pretty good of Quistis to realize they could only be friends. Other people would always have something like that at the back of their minds.

"Sir?"

Squall looked up to the conductor who had gotten his attention.

"If you're ready to board I can take your ticket now."

Good, Squall was sick of standing here. He stepped up on the train and handed him his ticket. The man punched the piece of paper and looked at it.

"Okay, you're in the second car down from the left." The conductor stepped back to let Squall through.

"Thanks." The commander stepped onto the metal stairs and turned left. He and Rinoa were sharing a car, but she was still getting stuff on. She had her ticket. It wasn't like they were attached at the hip or anything. Besides he hadn't really seen her since she found out about his fight with Irvine last night. She was giving him quite the cold shoulder, didn't even say anything last night, only giving one word answers. She didn't seem like she wanted to talk or be around him right now. God, was this the straw that broke the camel's back? He really messed up. This wasn't one where he could wait for them to come to him, he was going to have to take initiative.

He found the SeeD cabin and opened up the door with the ticket. The nice carpeted interior of the cabin contrasted with the industrial foyer he was just in. This one even had a double bed for him and Rinoa. The nightstand lamp was the only light in the room, but it was the only one needed, giving a boudoir feel. SeeDs definitely had it good on the train, thanks to that deal between Garden and the railroad system.

On the bed there was a suitcase. Rinoa must have already been here and dropped off their stuff. Squall took off his feathered jacket, revealing his white undershirt, and hung it on a coat hanger in the closet.

Zell barged into the room without knocking. Upon seeing Squall without his traditional jacket he looked away as if he were naked. "Oh, hey, Squall, I didn't know you were in here already." He held up a suit by its coat hanger, wrapped in clear plastic. "Rin wanted to put this in here. You left it in your room." Squall took it from him. It was his SeeD uniform. He had forgotten to take this with him.

"Thanks."

"Okay," Zell said, "If anybody needs me I'll be in the dining car. I'm so hungry, all I've had to eat today was a sandwich Xu gave me." Zell left and shut the door behind him.

Squall took his dark blue and gold suit and held it up. All the graduated SeeDs had to wear their uniforms for the ceremony, Garden regulation. Squall never liked that uniform. It was too formal for his taste, and itchy and hot, probably made from some wool out of Winhill. And it made him look like he was ready to attend a meeting of the world council. He put it on the bed, then thought better of it and put it in the closet. They'd probably want to sleep there soon, and Rinoa would yell at him for needing to move it.

Squall lied down on the bed and put his hands behind his head. Well, with that done, there wasn't much for him right now, but wait until the commotion had settled and then he could do what he needed to do. One time-killer he thought of was to check his e-mail, always a surefire way to waste time at work.

He got up off the bed and approached the Victorian desk next to the closet. He pulled up a panel in the desk's top and a bright screen lit up. He pulled out the keyboard drawer and sat down, waiting for it to start-up and get connected. After that, he logged onto the remote Garden network and navigated through to his e-mail program. There was only one letter for him since he last checked - from Laguna.

Squall hadn't expected him to respond really, at least not so fast. He dreaded opening personal letters like this - responses to bad news, he never knew how to answer. At first he wondered if he should open it at all, he probably wouldn't have much to say, and there would be nothing to say if he did. No, that was cowardly. He dismissed that thought and opened the letter. Squall was surprised that the reply was remarkably short for what he had said. Especially compared to what he usually wrote, and him being a former journalist. And long-winded buffoon.

 **Hey Squall,**

 **Is this for real? You're not playing a trick on your old man, are ya? Ha ha. If it is, that's great. Sorry I can't be there for the wedding. You'll have to tell me how it was. Ward might be getting a replacement voicebox pretty soon, so that'll be pretty cool. Only Kiros can understand his mumbles. Be sure and write back, I wanna hear all the details. Ellone says hi.**

 _He didn't believe me? He didn't have anything else to say? He didn't say anything about how she was awful young? Or that it was so sudden? Or her being pregnant?_

Squall sat back in his chair, dumbfounded. He had written just as much about Ward's voicebox as he did about the wedding. Squall practically gave him a Selphie Newsletter and this was all he responded with. Seifer was right, people really did react differently to things. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he should have expected it. Laguna was not one to take things seriously. And all his friends were taking it in stride. Maybe Squall was the only one who hadn't let go of it yet. No one else was taking it as seriously as he was. Maybe he just needed to lighten up. Maybe he had a few things to say to some people.

* * *

The sight of two beautiful girls, sitting at the corner edge of the bar together, would have turned many men on, if there had been any there. As it was, there was just the bartender, who was down on the other end, washing glasses, giving them enough privacy to talk without feeling like he was eavesdropping, and a creepy man in a brown jacket sitting in the back drinking a bourbon. Quistis and Rinoa paid him no mind though. They could take care of themselves, and they were too tired to worry about it. There was just the gentle hum of the engine and the rushing wind from the windows behind them.

Rinoa took a sip from her fuzzy navel at the same time Quistis tried her lemon daiquiri. The train was chugging along at full speed, creating a slight vibration in their stools that felt good.

"It's been a long day," Rinoa said.

"Yeah, I need this," Quistis said.

"Isn't that awful sour?"

"No, I like it." Quistis took another sip. "So who did Selphie choose for her maid of honor?"

"Xu, I think. She was pretty much the last candidate left."

"That's kinda sad."

"Yeah, it must suck to have all your friends in Trabia, not able to come down for the wedding." Rinoa took a sip. "If she asked you now, do you think you would do it?"

Quistis sighed. "I don't know. Now that I've had time to reflect on it all... I don't know." Quistis secretly hoped Selphie wouldn't re-ask. She didn't want to be trapped in that awkward situation of defending what she said, because now she wanted to be her maid of honor. She kind of regretted confusing her, but she was still of the same opinion. "I was too hard on Selphie."

"No, you weren't," Rinoa said. "We weren't. It's just been hard on us all."

"Well, I shouldn't have jumped on her like that. I felt really bad afterwards. I feel like I'm so distant from her now. I hope we haven't caused a rift in our friendship."

Rinoa put her arm on Quistis' slumped shoulder. "I don't think so, you two are too close for that. You did what you had to do, just like she's doing what she has to do."

"Has to do? That's a terrible way of saying it," Quistis muttered.

Rinoa looked away, a little ashamed. She tried to change the subject and sighed. "My arms are killing me."

Quistis took another drink of her fruity concoction. "What time are you getting up tomorrow?"

"I don't know. Squall usually wakes up before me, so whenever that happens..."

"Did you talk to him about... you know."

"No, I actually haven't much talked to him since then, with the train and all. But I've got plenty to say that I'm going to next time."

"Good. They both really could've hurt each other. They're both trained in killing arts," Quistis said.

"Stupid manly ritual, trying to prove himself."

"Hey, I've broken up plenty of girl fights in my time. They end up being more vicious then boy fights cause when they fight, they mean it. There's no stupid posturing."

"He's just so damn thick-headed."

"No, he's not thick-headed, just stoic. Once he has a feeling, he'll stand by it till the end. Even if he doesn't know he had it."

"That's the problem. He's been so out of his emotions. He's just so different lately. Starting fights with his friends, yelling at Selphie, the train car."

"Train car?"

"Oh, never mind. Sorry, I wasn't supposed to talk about that." Rinoa bit her lip. Quistis decided to respect her friend's mistake and not ask any more questions about that. She tipped back her lemon drink as Rinoa continued. "I thought he was making improvements until that fight with Irvine. Now I don't even know who he is anymore. I don't know how I can deal with him anymore. Do you think he regrets his life at all? Do you think he regrets everything that happened?"

Quistis grew a small smile at such a stupid question. "Meeting you? Falling in love? Saving the world? I don't think so."

"I mean, do you think, if he had all his life to do over again, would he? Would he change anything? Would he change one thing even if he knew everything else was going to end up different?"

Quistis breathed out as she finished her cold gulp. "You know what Squall's worst subject in school was?"

"Math?"

Quistis shook her head. "No."

"Uh, literature?"

"Nope, history. You know why?"

"Why?"

"Cause he hates the past. Cause you can't change it. You have no control over it and you can't do anything about it. Everything's there, laid out, all the bad, all the good, and you can't erase it. It's immutable. Even after we went through time compression and Ellone, we saw that. He could never understand why we had to learn about all the terrible things that have happened when we can't do anything about them. I tried to tell him, when he was still a student, that the reason we learn history is so we don't repeat the mistakes of the past. But he said he never learned about the mistakes of the past, only about what happened, that it was inevitable that humans would keep repeating their mistakes. Maybe he has got a point to that, I don't know. I'm not in the history department." She again sipped the lemon daiquiri. "Anyway, the point is, Squall likes to have control. Even despite his reluctance to become commander, he likes it. This kind of change scares him because he can't control it. He wishes he did. It probably reaches back to when Sis left. Not that he's wrong, change scares most people. But your life is always changing and Squall doesn't really see that."

"Yeah, he always did have kind of a problem seeing the bigger picture. You and the lunch lady would have a lot to talk about."

"The lunch lady?"

The door to the bar car slid open and Squall chose that moment to enter. Quistis and Rinoa looked to him and looked away, not really sure why, for some reason embarrassed. Squall approached Rinoa, who turned to him.

"Hey," he said.

Rinoa looked right at him and blurted, "Squall, you need to talk to Irvine. You need to apologize to him."

"I already did. Just now." He thumbed behind him, indicating that was where he'd just come from. "Selphie too. Not something I'd like to do again. That's why I'm here." He walked around to the first open stool on Quistis' right.

"Ah, pride is a bitter pill to swallow," Rinoa said.

Squall waved his finger to get the bartender's attention. "Sylkis," he said.

"Where is he now?" Rinoa asked.

"The boys are throwing him an impromptu bachelor party."

"And you're not there?"

"Do I look like a partier? It wasn't really my thing." The bartender handed him a yellow-labeled beer. Squall took a drink of the bitter liquid. "I thought you'd be having one for Selphie."

"We thought about it. Then we realized, really the last thing she wants is to go out and party when she can't even drink. Plus I think she was sick from the motion of the train."

"Heh," Squall snickered and drank. "So what were you talking about before I came in?" he said, penetrating the silence between those two that he had brought in with him.

"About you actually."

"Me?"

"Like how you've been acting since the beginning of all this."

Quistis sensed a fight beginning, started getting worried, and got up to leave. "Uh, I think I'll go to bed. Night, guys."

"Night," Rinoa said.

"Night," Squall said. Squall took Quistis' seat to get closer to Rinoa, pushing the empty lemon cooler aside. "What do you mean?"

"I think it's pretty obvious. The silence, the outbursts, the fighting-"

"-And you just want the old Squall back... or the new Squall... or whatever."

"Ahem," Rinoa purposely cleared her throat.

"Sorry."

"S'all right, I know you didn't mean it."

"No, I did. I meant everything I ever did. I don't lie and I don't dance around delicate subjects."

Rinoa imagined if Quistis were here she'd be saying 'you got that right!'.

Squall continued, "I know I haven't been acting like myself lately. I think with that fight with Irvine, I got a lot of crap out. I feel better after it. Something cathartic. I'm gonna try to be more open with stuff like this. If this didn't come as such a shock I probably would've done better than I did, but I just panicked and kept it all inside. So, I'm sorry for all that. I'm surprised you put up with me at all."

"Well, you're fun to keep around... sometimes," she smirked. "Getting all your apologies out in one night?"

"You were the last one. You know how I like to get things done in one fell swoop."

"Yes, that's why you eat one part of your meal, then the next, then the next."

Squall rolled his eyes back and groaned.

Rinoa giggled, "Tee-hee, I told you it was fun." She put a hand on Squall's shoulder. "Thanks, though."

Squall put his hand on her hand's soft skin, thinking about all the clashes and conflicts and fighting they'd been through. All the arguments and problems they had to work through, and somehow they were still together today. Squall knew he wouldn't be where he was today if it wasn't for Rinoa and her gentle counsel.

Counsel?

"Say," Squall said, "Are you still looking for a job?"


	13. Day 13: Saturday - The Wedding

DAY 13 - SATURDAY

THE WEDDING

"I'm ready."

"Wait, what?"

"I said I'm ready."

"You said you're ready," Squall said.

"Right," Rinoa responded. She came out of the bathroom wearing a dark blue evening gown.

"And we have an hour before we need to get down there."

"Right."

"And you're totally ready. You don't need to find your earrings, or match your shoes, or put on more make-up or anything like that."

"Right," Rinoa was grinning from ear-to-ear at this play.

"There's nothing you need to do. You're totally ready?"

"Right."

"...I love you." Squall took her in arms. Rinoa playfully tapped him on the shoulder.

"Oh, stop."

Squall gently let her go. "Do we need to get the others?"

"Maybe. We should go down and see if they need anything." Squall and Rinoa left their hotel suite, as formal as they could be. They passed by some kids in the hall running from the pool, paying no heed to the ceremonially dressed couple walking arm-in-arm. When they got to the others' room one floor below, Squall saw a note on the door. He took it off and read it.

"Rin and Squall. Went ahead to chapel. See you there."

"Hmph, and I thought I was gonna be the impressive one by being ready early."

Squall smiled. "Okay, well, let's head out there."

The two took an elevator down to the lobby and headed out of the hotel. It was only a few blocks from the hotel to the chapel so they just walked. On the way, Rinoa commented on a few things she saw in the window, reminders to come back here and pick some things up on her next shopping spree. Squall thought about how Galbadia sure had changed since the military disbanded. The fact that they weren't getting dirty looks was proof enough. He didn't feel any animosity from the townspeople, remnant of the conflicts between them and Galbadia. Now that freedom from tyranny was starting to settle in, they looked a bit more relaxed and relieved.

As they crossed the street at the green light, he saw the sloping roof of the chapel halfway down the block. "Guess this is it," he said to Rinoa. "This is the culmination of the past two weeks of work."

"Yep, guess so."

"This is where it's all led to."

"Are you nervous?" Rinoa looked up at him.

"Well, this is my first wedding. The first one I've been to, I mean."

"Really? I've been to some. My dad being a dignitary, weddings were always a great place to hobnob, but they were always so extravagant and elaborate. This should be nice and simple. Much less ceremony."

"Yeah, nice and basic." It's hard not to be when you have no money or time.

They entered the chapel through a side door, not the grand double-door entrance. There were a few people milling about in the hallway that Squall didn't recognize, shuffling around the burgundy carpet. Faux wooden paneling veneer covered the walls, which were dotted with bulletin boards, flyers, and an occasional piece of art or two. At the far end was an empty, darkened cafeteria-like room. He looked into the sanctuary and saw Irvine and Selphie talking to the pastor. There were about thirty minutes to go, and apparently they were just finishing up the rehearsal. Irvine was fully dressed in his SeeD uniform, complete with medals and honors. Without his hat, he seemed smaller, with less hair, even though it was tied up in a ponytail behind him. Selphie however was wearing a sweatshirt and jeans still. They came back down the aisle and Rinoa and Squall went in to meet them.

"Hi guys," Selphie said. "You look good."

"Thanks," Rinoa said.

"Where's your dress?" Squall asked.

"Have to get into it. Come on, we gotta go," she said to Rinoa and yanked her hand. Selphie waved to Quistis on the other side of the room. "Quistis! Dress time!"

Quistis, who was fiddling with a camera, put it on a bench and skipped out into the hall as the two other girls did. Squall followed them out, watching them gather and enter a large closet turned into a makeshift dressing room.

 _Wait, wait, don't leave me alone with these people,_ Squall panicked his mind. He was in a foreign city surrounded by very few of his friends, most of whom had just left. The commander exited the sanctuary and looked into the foyer.

Everyone who was a SeeD was in his or her uniforms. It reminded him of the graduation ball. Inside the sanctuary, a bunch of people were getting things ready, setting up equipment. Irvine and Zell were adjusting a set of personal cameras scattered around. A tall man in SeeD uniform came up to Irvine to ask him a question about the stereo equipment. Assumably, he was Irvine's best man. Two girls were practicing singing with the piano player.

He returned to walk around the foyer, not feeling like interrupting their setup, since he knew very little about cameras or electronic equipment. Now he was just bored. A few older people started filtering in, none of them he knew. Mostly old people, probably relatives. A few SeeD-aged people bounced in, maybe teachers. Sets of elders, including Edea and Cid, met each other for the first time. The caretakers of their broods, about to be inexplicably locked together, talking about sports to try and scrounge for ice-breakers. Squall averted his peeping eyes to look at the flyers posted on the bulletin board. Kids' programs, after-school track, an art contest.

Zell came over to Squall from behind, slightly startling the commander. "Hey, spiffy uniform," he said.

"It's the same as yours."

"Yeah, but you get a cool commander insignia," the blonde said as he brushed off the Balamb symbol over his heart. The fighter was dressed formally, a rarity for him, and his hair was neatly combed, losing his tell-tale front spike, but still somehow, it retained its playful nature. "Come on, Squall. What would Rinoa say if she caught you out here being anti-social?"

"Who do I have to be social with? I don't know any of these people." This was true. At social functions hosted by Garden he had to serve as the Garden Commander - make small talk, socialize, mingle, all for the purpose of advancing Garden. But they usually did the yapping for him and he just listened. And it was all business matters. Here, he was just Squall, Selphie's friend. These were not people he was going to see ever again. They weren't people he cared about. These weren't his people, they were Irvine and Selphie's people. Mostly Irvine's people since most of Selphie's were in Trabia.

"Yeah, I guess," Zell said. He put his head down, crossed his arms, and tapped his foot on the carpet.

Squall noticed that no girl was around him either. "You never got your date?"

"Nah, kinda gave up on that. I guess everyone was right, I didn't really need one for this."

"Yeah, that's what everyone else said. Quistis thought about asking you out of pity but I talked her out of it."

"Quistis? I never said anything about Quistis. I like her just fine. Why would you ask?"

"I didn't say... anything... what are you talking about?"

"Um, never mind, I was thinking of a dream I had."

A girl in a very pretty violet dress holding a bouquet approached the two of them. For some reason she was dressed like a bridesmaid.

"Excuse me, can you tell me where Selphie is?"

"I think she's in that closet... room... thing," Squall said as he pointed behind her.

She turned to look and said "Thanks."

"Who was that?" Zell asked as soon as she was out of earshot.

"Don't know."

She entered the door and closed it carefully behind her. Suddenly, delightful muffled screams erupted abruptly from the room. It startled Squall visibly, as it sounded like someone was being horribly murdered in there.

"What th'?" Zell stammered. Then he looked at Squall and shrugged. "Girls."

"Hey, Zell, we need you for a sec," someone from the sanctuary called in. Zell immediately rushed off into the temple, leaving Squall by himself once again.

This was getting really dull. Did all weddings take this long to set up? If they did, he was glad he'd never been to one. He didn't have the patience for it. He bided his time for fifteen or so minutes, looking at nearly every piece of written work in the chapel, observing the people walking in and out, pretending to be interested in the flyers posted on the wall. With each passing moment he was getting impatient about whether it would start. It was already ten minutes past its scheduled start, and looked like it might pass fifteen. Not that he blamed them for taking so long, he was just getting tired of waiting and waiting and waiting. He leaned against the wall, crossed his arms, and bowed his head, like he was trying to sleep.

An unctuously obese man shambled up to Squall, with his wife in tow at arm's side. Squall noticed him just as he reached speaking distance. "You, my good sir, look like you could use a little company."

Squall turned to him, and had planned to say nothing in response to this, but the man continued before his disassociative pause would commence. "Nice to meet you..." he held out his hand to shake.

"... Squall." Squall's hesitation came off as standoffishness, but his vegetative state of mind simply prevented him from realizing that the stranger was asking him his name.

Squall took his hand in his. His palm was pudgy, like biscuit dough, and a little sweaty. He was wearing an overly expensive suit & tie and too-large square spectacles. Rolls of fat encircled his neck. His wife had one hand crooked under her husband's elbow. In sharp contrast, she was a petite, waify thing with thin white-blond hair in artificial locks and wore a pink dress with pearls. Who were these people?

"My name's Oscar, this is my wife Constance."

She meekly bowed her head and said a quiet, polite "How d'you do?"

Squall nodded politely in acknowledgment and nothing else.

"Well, are you a friend of the bride or groom?" Oscar said.

Squall turned to him, wondering who in the world this was and why he was speaking to him so familiarly. "Both," he said.

Oscar took a handkerchief out of his front pocket and wiped his wide, glistening forehead. "Hotter'n blazes out there today, literally. Thank goodness it's nice and cool in here," he said as he dabbed his brow.

His wife spoke up, widening her eyes to Squall and poking her head forward like a hen. "It's these warm air currents that are coming in from the ocean. I read about them in the news."

"Yes, probably," the man said again. "Those jet streams coming in from the gulf, mixing with the continental air. It just raises the air moisture. It's not the heat though, it's the humidity. At least that's what they all keep saying. Fine day for a wedding though, inn't it?" He had a demeanor that made Squall think he was a local, probably someone who made a lot of money off the now defunct Deling regime.

The urge to let out nothing more than a guttural 'mmf' of acknowledgement was superceded by Squall's need to be polite and respectable. "Yes," he said.

"Bit of an inconvenient time though. This is the busiest time of the year for us. I'm in the transportation revenue business, taxing and tolls and that sort of thing. Always a big time of the year for us with people going on vacation. Doesn't bother me though, long as they keep punching those tickets, eh?" The portentious man faked nudging him in the ribs as he laughed raucously, as if he'd just heard the funniest joke in the world instead of telling it. He took off his glasses, examining them for specks, wiping them off with his same sweaty handkerchief and continued, "Yeah, I've literally got a ton of work at the office now, that I wish I could do."

 _Yeah, I wish you could too,_ Squall thought and looked around for other friends.

"At least I didn't have to travel far. That bus system is literally a lifesaver. Did you have to come a long way to get here?"

"Overnight."

The minister walked out of the sanctuary and announced, "I think we're gonna have people sit down now." He had a booming voice, probably needed since this was a small chapel. Yet the people in front of him still continued.

"Yeah, these trains are pretty nice, but nothing beats the versatility of a car though. You can travel to any part of the world you like. And rental places are everywhere you want to be. Can you tell I work in the business?" He laughed again, Squall made no response again. "Yeah, these trains. I remember when I was young and they just started building them. And this whole town was literally under construction. Hah, people were still wearing peacoats and such." He laughed boisterously at the thought, a big gut laugh. Squall didn't know what a peacoat was.

His wife finally got a word into the conversation, unfortunately it was as meaningless as the others. "I was still living in Dollet then," she gesticulated, flopping her hand down like a wing.

"That's right, you were," Oscar said.

"It was such a pretty country then, back before the occupation. Oh, but it's so much more cleaner now."

"Uh-huh," Squall acknowledged, trying to mentally force them to go sit down.

Oscar said, "Yeah, that was all the military occupation. Forget what some people say, it has its good points. It's not like that Dukedom that was just literally powerless. Businesses really picked up after Galbadia came in, as long as those pesky resistance factions weren't in the way. Personally, I think the whole thing could have been a lot less violent, but, some people, you know?"

Squall resisted the urge to crush his windpipe, figuring he could never get his hands around his neck.

Oscar itched his temple with one pudgy finger. "Well, guess we better get seated. We'll see you inside." He raised his hand in farewell and he and his wife entered the sanctuary. Squall thanked his lucky stars.

Squall looked back to the closet, none of the girls were out yet. People were still milling about, but slowly shuffling in, and here he was without his partner. Where was Rinoa? He didn't want to sit down without her. He didn't know where she wanted to sit. He didn't know where was appropriate. Wasn't family only supposed to sit in front, or something like that? He stood near the closet door like he needed to go to the bathroom really badly. Why didn't she just come on out here? He didn't want to sit next to someone he didn't know. She knew these people better than him.

He decided he couldn't wait any longer and entered the sanctuary, grabbing a pink program from the doorway basket on the way. It turned out many benches were available. He traipsed down the aisle, and took an empty seat about five rows back from the stage. He looked up at the massive ceiling, remembering he read once that these buildings were designed to be large so that the patrons would be humbled. Irvine was already up there at the altar, grinning from ear to ear. Three personal cameras were stationed at their tripods or being held by their users, Zell being one of them. It was a little sad that since he was alone, he had to watch the wedding through a viewfinder, but he probably didn't mind.

Apparently, nothing was happening yet. Not even the girls had come back out to indicate Selphie was ready. He was picturing her throwing up in a bucket, trying not to mess her dress. He took the time to inspect his program. It was a simple list of events and names in tissue paper, stapled to pink construction paper and topped with a small pink bow.

  
_Selphie Hilary Tilmitt & Irvine Miles Kinneas_

 _Seating of Mothers_

 _Processional_

 _Attendants - Xu Anshin and Kule Dixon_

 _Giving of the Bride - Cid Kramer_

 _Welcome - Joseph Kinneas_

 _Message_

 _Lighting of Unity Candle_

 _Song: Fragments of Memories_

 _Exchange of Vows and Rings_

 _Marriage Benediction_

 _Pronouncement of Marriage_

 _Recessional_

 _Song: My Oath_

Squall had never heard of any of these songs, but at least they didn't pick _Eyes on Me_. That song was so over-played, though he figured Rinoa would probably want it at her wedding. It was justified in that case though.

Rinoa came down the aisle then and sat beside Squall. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hey," he said. "Is Selphie okay?"

"Yeah, we were trying to get her into her dress," she said. "Her friend from Trabia came down to be her maid of honor!"

"What?"

"Her friend. You remember her? We met her when we went to Trabia a year ago to look at the damage? She was the first one to greet us."

Squall had no idea, but gave her the benefit of the doubt.

"Anyway, she came down as a surprise. I guess someone wrote her about the maid of honor situation or something and she came down somehow in the nick of time."

"Oh, that's what all the screaming was about."

"I know. Isn't that so nice? So she's replacing Xu."

"Ah," Squall said as he looked down at his program, mentally crossing out Xu's name.

"Which is good, cause I think she felt she was kind of the last person left and was just being a maid of honor out of sympathy. Selphie was so much happier when she came in."

Squall nodded. In truth, he was a little relieved as well, for both of them. In garden, he learned that no matter what situation you were in, you always needed someone by your side to back you up. If he was in Selphie's situation and had to pick Xu because she was the only woman who didn't seem to care too much about her predicament, that would have nothing but bruised feelings on all parties. But this happy surprise seemed to have taken care of that.

The organ started playing a classic song. Everyone craned their necks backward and looked at the open doorway. Xu hurriedly snuck in and took a seat near the middle, still holding her bouquet and wearing her silver dress. Selphie's friend and Kule emerged in the white light and slowly walked down the aisle, arm in arm. Now that Squall had a chance to look at her friend, he saw she had her brown hair into ribbon-like curls with a tiara. Irvine's best man stood nearly a foot taller than Squall. Irvine must have belonged to a tall person's club in Galbadia. They eventually reached the stage and separated to their respective positions.

The organist transitioned to the bridal march and everyone stood up. Selphie appeared in the middle of the doorway, wearing a very traditional bridal gown with veil in back, very fitting to her form while still being conservative. Her hair, usually unnaturally buoyant and lively at the tips, had managed to be compressed down and tied up in the back, making it seem flat and dull. She took one step at a time down the aisle, with a big grin plastered on her face that Squall thought could almost be considered sincere, not that she should be unhappy, or sad, or hiding back tears. Squall could not even fathom what Selphie had to be feeling at this moment, so he decided not to dwell on it and pushed the thought out of his mind.

When she had arrived at the front of the sanctuary the minister announced. "Who gives this woman away to be wed?"

Cid spoke up. "I and my wife, Edea."

"Please be seated," the minister said. Everyone sat down. Squall thought this dialogue seemed very artificial and choreographed. A man who must have been Irvine's adopted father, according to the schedule on the program, stood up. He had a bald head and wore small glasses. This must have been his welcome.

"I'd like you welcome you all to the wedding of my son and his bride. When we received Irvine when he was just six years old, we had no idea what he'd become. We had no idea he'd be part of the most planet-shattering events in our lives. And now we're glad you're here for the most planet-shattering event in his life." He took his seat.

The minister stepped forward holding a notebook, presumably containing his speech. Irvine and Selphie remained on separate sides of the stage, rather far apart.

"We're here today to join in wedlock Irvine Kinneas and Selphie Tilmitt. Now due to the expediency of this wedding, due to Irvine's important mission, I've been thinking about the most important relationship model we have to base ourselves on, that of a Sorceress and her Knight. The Sorceress' job has a role of magic power, independent of a Guardian Force. But such power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. So the Knight is there to stabilize his Sorceress, to fight for her when she can't, when magic will not do, for the physical fight. So these two complement each other. That's how the two become successful, by two people recognizing that each other has something the other is lacking, and to recognize their strengths and weaknesses. This is how all relationships are and should be as modeled by Hyne. Now, Selphie, with Irvine shipping out soon, you're going to find a lack of something in your life. That's because by joining together, you're no longer Selphie and Irvine, but one unit, combined into one flesh."

 _Heh, I think the one flesh has been taken care of,_ Squall thought.

The minister continued droning on and on about roles and responsibilities, making gestures with his hands and pretending to talk to Selphie and Irvine personally. He sure did like to mention that Irvine was shipping out a lot, he would have thought that would be a more sensitive subject, as if he was dancing around why they were really all here. Maybe.

* * *

 _Squall stood behind a pillar, sipping on his low-ball with golden liquor inside. He still felt fairly uncomfortable, finally being able to drink at these things. He still felt too young. He turned to see the guests gathered at the punch bowl, those too young to drink. This was a less formal party for new students and those entering the SeeD program. Selphie called it a mixer. It made the atmosphere much more relaxed, unlike the SeeD graduation balls. This was the first party after time compression he'd attended and the first one since being commander, if one excepted the party afterwards to celebrate their victory._

 _Rinoa spun around from behind the pillar and began waving her fingers in front of his face._

 _"You're going to like me, you're going to like me," she chanted. She waved her hand before his eyes like she was doing a curse while he remained stone-faced. She paused to smile glibly at him._

 _"Did anyone ever tell you you're annoying?" Squall said._

 _"Did anyone ever tell you you're an idiot?"_

 _Squall smiled. Rinoa smiled back._

 _"Guess who's hooking up tonight?" she said._

 _"What?"_

 _Rinoa turned her head around to look near the far side of the ballroom. Selphie and Irvine were goofing around on the dance floor, jumping and hopping like idiots. Irvine looked ridiculous with his tall coat swinging back and forth._

 _"Aren't they so cute?" Rinoa said._

 _Squall furrowed his brows. SeeD frowned on personal relationships. It was bad enough he was in the situation he was in with Rinoa. But he'd defend it to the death. It was kind of an exception though. "It's all Quistis and I have been talking about," Rinoa continued. "It's about time, they've been flirting for three months."_

 _Squall sipped his drink. "Yeah." He watched Irvine swirl around Selphie like he was ballroom dancing. He swished his head backward to see a busty underclasswoman pass by him on the floor while Selphie did some sort of weird jig. When she looked up at Irvine she grabbed him by the chin and refocused his attention back to her._

 _Squall remarked, "They've definitely been flirting for three months. Sometimes with each other."_

 _Rinoa looked behind Squall's shoulder. "Oh, I've got to go help Quistis with some Trepies. Be right back." She patted him on the shoulder, winked, and passed behind him. Squall had an inexplicable sense of déjà vu._

 _He shrugged it off and turned back to Selphie and Irvine, still skipping up and down and swinging back and forth. They seemed like an unlikely couple, but there have been unlikelier ones. They sure had a nice height difference - 6'0" and 5'1". It was kinda funny to watch them. Irvine kind of looked like he was helping a kid dance._

 _As the song changed to something slower, he turned behind him to check on where Rinoa had gone to. They were next to an unlit part of the wall, close to the starry night windows, talking to three, shorter fourteen-year-olds clamoring around the blonde teacher. Whatever they were doing to shoo them away wasn't working. Squall left his station under the pillar to go see what he could do. He never liked the idea of the Trepies. Ogling a teacher, it was unhealthy. If he had his way, he would have the Trepies forcibly disbanded._

 _As he approached, Rinoa sharply pointed his finger at him and declared, "That's the guy who should be your role model - Squall Leonhart."_

 _Squall stopped in his tracks, startled. He had sudden visions of his worst fear._

 _Rinoa went on. "He almost single-handedly thwarted Sorceress Ultimecia. He was the first commander of Garden. He's more than just a simple teacher. He's the only gunblade expert on campus."_

 _"Really?" one of the students said._

 _"That I know of," Rinoa added under her breath._

 _Quistis said, "Why don't you start a new trend - the Squallies."_

 _The three students cautiously approached Squall. They tilted their heads left and right, trying to get a good look at him in the dim light. Squall stood like a statue, withstanding the analysis._

 _"He's kind of scruffy, though," one of them said._

 _Scruffy?_

 _A student turned back to the girls. "We'll think about it." They walked off into the dance floor, giggling to themselves._

 _Squall looked at them go, then came up to Rinoa and Quistis. They had their hands in front of their mouths, stifling their snickers._

 _"Scruffy?" he said._

 _They belted out in laughter, nearly doubling over. Squall rolled his eyes and waited for their guffaws to subside._

 _"Thanks, Squall," Quistis said between breaths, "I owe you one."_

 _"We all owe each other a lot. Let's just let it slide," he smirked. He went to Rinoa's side and positioned himself to look out into the dance floor, ready to talk about the goings-on._

 _"Hey, where did Selph and Irvine go?" Rinoa said._

 _Squall scanned the dance floor up and down, searching for them, and not having success._

 _"Ohmigod, look!" Quistis said as she hunched forward and pointed. Rinoa and Squall peered past the lit floor._

 _In a dark corner of the dance hall, Irvine and Selphie were standing and kissing._

 _Quistis and Rinoa gasped. Rinoa said, "Is that... Are we seeing their first kiss?"_

 _"I think so," Quistis said delightedly._

 _"Cuuuute!"_

 _Am I really seeing this, Squall thought. He felt himself start to blush. He wanted to turn away, but couldn't seem to. Their eyes were closed. They looked so into each other. Was that what Rinoa and him looked like?_

* * *

Squall drifted away from his reverie. _That was the start of it all,_ he realized. _Whenever something like this happens, you have to think back to what started it all, how it began, to see how it will end._

 _The most important thing in a relationship is love. It's not the only thing that should be in a relationship, and it's not the only thing that will sustain it, but it's the most important thing. Irvine loves the baby. Selphie loves Irvine. The baby will love them both. Maybe it'll work out. I wish I knew._

"Now," the minister said, "We will light the Unity Candle." Irvine and Selphie were both together now, standing one side of the stage, each had a candle lit in their hands. "The candle represents two flames of life, burning with spirit, becoming one whole, greater than the sum of its parts." The minister turned to them and they both dipped their wicks into a very large, thick candle on a stand. While this went on, the organist played a romantic song, to which two of the girls sang along. Irvine and Selphie stood there while it went on.

When they were done they blew their respective candles out, set them down, and went before the minister again, standing close enough to hold hands. Kule gave Irvine the ring and Irvine placed it at the edge of Selphie's finger.

The minister said, "Irvine, repeat after me. I, Irvine."

"I, Irvine."

"Take you, Selphie."

"Take you, Selphie."

"To be my wife."

"To be my wife."

"To have and to hold."

"To have and to hold."

"From this day forward."

"From this day forward."

"For better or worse."

"For better or worse."

"In sickness and in health."

"In sickness and in health."

"To love and to cherish."

"To love and to cherish."

"Until we are parted by death."

"Until we are parted by death."

"This is my solemn vow."

"This is my solemn vow."

Irvine pushed his ring onto Selphie's finger. Selphie took her's from her friend and held it at the ready.

The minister said, "Selphie, repeat after me. I, Selphie."

"I, Selphie."

"Take you, Irvine."

"Take you, Irvine."

"To be my husband."

"To be my husband."

"To have and to hold."

"To have and to hold."

"From this day forward."

"From this day forward."

"For better or worse."

"For better or worse."

"In sickness and in health."

"In sickness and in health."

"To love and to cherish."

"To love and to cherish."

"Until we are parted by death."

"Until we are parted by death."

"This is my solemn vow."

"This is my solemn vow."

Selphie pushed the ring onto Irvine's finger. It seemed it wasn't quite fitting so she tried applying more force. It looked to Squall like she was going to break his finger.

"Easy, easy," Irvine said and laughed. Selphie laughed too. She finally got the ring fully on, much to her relief, Squall was sure.

The minister took both their hands and looked up to the ceiling. "May Hyne bless and keep these rings safe, for they symbolize the unbreakable bond and the unbreakable circle of life. Let us give thanks to the creator of us all. We ask that you bless this union with growth, nourishment, love, hope, and change, that it may sustain through all hardships and live forever and ever. Amen." The minister let go of their hands and turned to the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm delighted to present to you, Mr. Irvine Kinneas and Mrs. Selphie Kinneas."

There was much clapping in the audience as they kissed, the first time as husband and wife. The pianist played an instrumental tune as they walked out of the church slowly, arm in arm. Then the front row of parents stood up and followed them out. Squall thought they were going to be dismissing by row so he waited until everyone before him got their chance. When he turned to leave he was surprised to find a line gathering up at the walkway. He looked over their heads and saw they were shaking Irvine's hand and hugging Selphie, congratulating them. Squall didn't think he'd ever hugged Selphie before. This would be a first. In fact, he didn't think he had really ever touched either of them. He wasn't quite sure what to do. Wait, why was he so nervous about this? Because he felt differently about this than everyone.

When he finally got up there, he shook Irvine's hand and bowed his head slightly, saying 'congratulations'. He shifted over and hugged Selphie lightly about the shoulders. "Congratulations," he said to her as well.

"Thank you," she said.

He went over to where Rinoa was standing, expecting her to let him know what the next move was. She was talking to Quistis about the wedding or something. The wedding party was joking about how Selphie couldn't get the ring on.

Rinoa tapped him on the shoulder. "Come on," she whispered. Quistis was right ahead of her. They slipped behind the new bride and groom with their families and into the parking lot.

"What?" he said as he saw Quistis digging in her bag.

"We're gonna decorate the car."

"We are?"

"Unless you wanna stay here."

"Ok, let's go."

The teacher pulled out a few rolls of streamers from her bag and handed one to Rinoa. They found the open-top car waiting in the chapel parking lot and started taping bits of paper and balloons to their mirrors, bumper, and elsewhere. Squall pretty much supervised and held the tape. It was tradition for the newly married couple to drive through the town on their way to the reception area while the other guests paraded after them. Smaller villes like Winhill used a horse-drawn carriage, which was how the tradition was originally done.

Quistis took out a can of shaving cream and tossed it to Rinoa who tossed her streamer roll back. "We can put some streamers here and here, and on the rear-view mirrors." Quistis handed Squall the streamer roll, expecting him to lend a hand. He looked at it, a bit dumbfounded, while Rinoa sprayed 'Just Married' on the round trunk in shaving cream. The commander felt silly taping crepe paper to someone's car, but tried to look comfortable nonetheless.

"Okay," Rinoa said as she finished up, "Let's get to the reception."

"Right now?" Squall asked as he gave back the tape.

"Yeah, we need to make sure everything's set up first, and we need to get there before they do."

Squall thought they were going to be walking behind the car, but this definitely sounded like the better option. The three started on a hurried walk towards the chapel. The fact that Irvine and Selphie's mini-parade took an indirect route and went at walking pace would help them some. Plus, being on foot, they could take a number of shortcuts down some alleys.

"Well, that was a pretty nice ceremony," Quistis said.

"Yeah, I don't know if I'd want that message for my wedding, though," Squall said. He didn't like the idea of having assigned duties thrust upon them by their minister, or anyone else. It restricted their freedom to be who they wanted to be.

"Yeah, I mean it kinda feels like they have to play that role now, doesn't it?" Rinoa said. "Like that's the theme of their relationship."

"I can tell you they're nothing like a Sorceress and Knight from firsthand experience," Squall said.

"And second-hand," Quistis chimed in.

They passed by a collection of garbage cans and exited onto an open street, brightly lit by the street-lights. Quistis took the lead a few feet ahead of them. Squall and Rinoa walked together.

"They're just gonna have to find their own way. That's what me and Squall did," Rinoa said.

"But we had the advantage of not needing to rush things... or rather, lack of disadvantage."

"Yeah, we needed that."

Squall darted his head toward Rinoa. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, you're getting better, but it's still hard to get along with you... sometimes. Being in a relationship was a first time for you too. You did a lot of things I thought were rude, but then I realized you were just being yourself, because you didn't know how to act with another person so connected with you, at the time. It's just because you'd never been with another human being before and didn't know how to react."

"Maybe," Squall conceded. "We made it, didn't we?" They stopped at a stoplight, waiting to cross.

"Yes, but, sometimes, it felt like you weren't trying. Especially this week. This week just let you see what I meant. You're just so afraid of what's going to happen in the future. How we're all going to go to different places eventually."

"I'm not afraid of it."

"No, but you're scared because you can't know. You feel like you can't do anything about it. That's what I've realized these past two weeks about you, about your resistance to change."

"My resistance to change..." Squall repeated seriously. "...Myself?"

"No, in general. In the world. That you're afraid of it."

"I'm not afraid of it. I just don't want things to change. Is that so wrong?"

"But Squall, everyday life is change. Life can't help but change as you get older. Zell's not going to be an instructor. So how long do you think he's going to be at Garden? Quistis? Any of us? Eventually we're all gonna move on."

"I know," Squall said, cutting off Rinoa's harangue before it got too big, with a rather unsettling admittance. "I've been thinking about that lately, about how we're all growing up and eventually we're all gonna move away from each other, whether I like it or not. We're all lucky we've lived this long, being mercenaries. But I've seen a lot of people lose their loved ones through the years. Being a merc, you have to get detached to it. But this one hit home, cause it was one of our own. Two, actually. I know the trick's not recognizing that you have a problem, but acting on what you recognize. It's hard to explain. You can't do anything about what's happened but you're the way you are because of it. Ellone said to me, on the space station, when she realized that sending us into the past wouldn't have worked, 'You're the one that changes, not the past'. The trick is not to lose touch with them, to hold onto them, hold on to the things important to you, remember all the good times. That's how you keep things from changing, in your heart. You hold onto part of them with you wherever you go in life."

Rinoa stopped moving forward and clasped onto Squall's torso in a sort of half-hug, half-grasp. It took Squall by surprise.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

She looked up at him with her walnut eyes. "Holding on."

* * *

Squall was seated among his friends, laughing and talking. Irvine was goofing around, just like his usual self. It looked like the fight hadn't damaged his spirits at all. Selphie was being a bit more reserved than normal, but still looked happy to be done with all the dull ceremony and moved onto the party. Selphie's friend had apparently received her infamous video camera and was wandering around the tables, poking it in other people's faces.  
"Uragh," the man across from him uttered gutturally, "Looks like those Mach Chocobos are doing pretty good this year," he said to Squall.

Squall lightly nodded and looked away. Oscar, fat off the suffering of people and his own appetite, and his wife had seated themselves kitty corner from him. Squall tried to pretend he didn't exist, but every ten minutes he would come up with some trite phrase, usually about sports, that needed to be acknowledged. Squall knew this guy had to be a portentous jerk when it came time to order drinks and he asked for a scotch and rye on the rocks with three olives. And he made these horribly throaty sounds like his voicebox was clogged with lard.

"Sounds like Ceni Tidane is going to get traded," he added for the second time.

The small reception had been stuck in a loft above a bar and grill and it was growing hotter by the minute. Especially in the damn SeeD uniform. And that other table was finishing up their meal, and they hadn't even gotten their's yet. Wasn't the wedding party supposed to served first or something? Did they have only one person working here or what?

He felt a wet pop on his cheek and turned back to Rinoa. She was holding a bubble wand up, looking guiltless and delighted. Squall smiled too. He was surprised Selphie and Irvine had the presence of mind to think of these little party favors for the wedding. Zell and Selphie began getting into a bubble war with Squall in the middle. He leaned his head back to stay out of the soapy crossfire. They began laughing so hard that they could no longer blow their bubbles without bursting into laughter. Rinoa was trying to get a piece of the action too, trying to blow and giggle at the same time. Squall rolled his eyes.

Spontaneously, the sound of glasses clinking together began. Selphie and Irvine leaned to each other and kissed passionately. It was a little gross to watch, as far as Squall's opinion went. The glasses started so synchronously he was wondering if there was some conspiracy afoot. It was the second time they had done it tonight. Squall picked another candy mint out of the bag behind his empty plate.

"Hungry?" Rinoa asked.

"Aren't you?"

"Yeah, but your mints are for after dinner."

"Then I'll just leave one left."

Finally, the waitress set his plate before him and Squall dug in like Zell at the cafeteria. One of the rules of being a mercenary was that you never knew when or where your next meal was going to come from, so you never let it go to waste. Plus he always was a fast eater.

Meanwhile, Quistis leaned over to Zell. "How do you like your filet mignon?" Zell had never heard of filet mignon before and had to ask Quistis what it was. His curiosity got the better of him and he had ordered it to see how it tasted.

"Eh, it's pretty good. It's not a hot dog, but it'll do."

"Wait, did you say you like hot dogs?" the waitress behind him said. She was collecting dishes and passing behind him, suddenly stopping her duties. Zell and Quistis looked up at her with strange eyes.

"Yeah," Zell said bemusedly, happy to talk about one of his favorite subjects. "I eat 'em every chance I get."

"Stay right there," she smiled. She practically ran off with her dirty plates into the kitchen. "Where's she going?" Rinoa asked.

"Dunno. I said 'hot dogs' and she bolted."

Everyone was finished eating up and the workers were taking the plates away. Now they were ready to cut the cake, which had been waiting for them at the end of the loft. Selphie and Irvine stood up and shifted out from the end of the table, the bride trying to handle her massive dress. Before they could cut the cake though, they had to stand by it, while the amateur photographers took pictures as Irvine held up the knife at the ready. They were both staring into the camera and smiling, like they'd bought a new car. When they got done, Irvine sliced two small pieces of cake from the massive two-story pastry. Selphie took her piece and gently pushed it into Irvine's mouth. He ate quickly, then got a big evil grin on his face

"Don't," Selphie warned, stifling giggles, "Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't," she repeated quickly as Irvine attacked her with the cake, smearing it all over her closed mouth. "No, eeek!" she shrieked with glee. Selphie grabbed a handful and tried to do the same, but her tiny arms only managed a fraction of what Irvine was able to get in as he fended her off. When the wrestling match was over, the photographers took more pictures of the two, while someone waited in the wings with a towel to give as soon as their embarrassment was documented. Meanwhile, the waiter took the knife and sliced the cake into pieces for everyone. When Squall got his, he ate it hungrily, not satisfied by dinner at all.

"They sure didn't skimp on the sugar on this, did they?" Rinoa, who had gotten her piece just previous, said weakly.

It was very heavy on the frosting. Very heavy. He could feel blood rushing to his head, like a hot flash, from all the sugar. His eye twitched sporadically.

"Pretty nice cake, isn't it?" the fat man across from him said.

"Mm-hm," Squall said, not wanting to disagree with him and get into a conversation.

While Zell was eating his cake, the waitress came back, holding some yellow-brown thing on a stick. She went up behind Zell and handed it to him. "Here."

Zell took it by the stick and tilted it up and down, gauging this gift that smelled like food. "What is it?"

"It's a corn dog. It's a hot dog wrapped in corn batter and then deep fried and put on a stick," she defined as he took a bite.

His eyes suddenly glowed like magic as his tongue wrapped around the hot dog concoction. "I love you."

She giggled from the praise. "It's a little invention me and my father came up with during down time."

"Can you show me how?"

"Sure, come on." Zell eagerly stood up from his seat and followed the girl into the kitchen. Quistis rolled her eyes and smirked.

"Ah, here we go," the fat obnoxious man said, looking over Squall's head. He turned around to see that Irvine's best man, Kule, was standing up, holding his drink.

"Well, I guess it's my place to say a few words." Squall thought this was another tradition he'd never heard about, the best man speech. "I've known Irvine ever since he came to Galbadia Garden, when he was just a little boy with a thing for guns. We spent a lot of time fighting and training, getting in trouble with Headmaster Martine. And through it all, Irvine was always the ladies man and I was the dedicated student. Now here it is, years later, and the impossible's happened - Irvine's settled down. And I couldn't be happier for him. Irvine and Selphie are truly soul mates. When I first met Selphie, it became apparent that she was the only one who could put up with Irvine." The audience laughed. "Marriage in this day and age is far from easy, with all the pressures of ordinary life, you'll need to grow an understanding while not forgetting what first brought you together. So what I'm saying is, may your love last through the modern times, yet be old enough to last forever." He raised his glass and everyone drank whatever they had to the married couple. He sat down when everyone was finished.

Then Selphie's friend, who had put down her video camera and returned to her side, got up and went to the corner where the presents were. She produced a boom box from under the table and plugged it in next to the sink. Rinoa nudged Squall as if he wasn't paying attention already, apparently very pleased with herself.

"Okay, Selphie, Irvine, could you come up here?" They did as she continued. "The girls and I were talking about how you were sorely lacking one thing from your wedding and we came up with this." She pushed play on the box and stood back. A very slow, romantic song started playing. Selphie and Irvine looked into each other's eyes and danced to the music. Squall realized what she meant - their first dance as a married couple. Of course. The loft didn't have any dance floor, so there was no DJ, so there was no traditional first dance. It was a very heartfelt gesture.

Irvine had his hands around the small of her back and Selphie rested her head on Irvine's chest, tucked under his head. It was a very sweet song, and Squall thought they looked so peaceful together. He imagined Rinoa and himself dancing like that in front of everybody, wondering if he would be embarrassed. The song finished and the audience clapped as they kissed.

"Very nice, very nice," Oscar boomed, across from him. Did this guy have to comment on everything?

A little later, it became time to throw the bouquet, the event the girls had been squealing about and the boys had been dreading. They'd called all the single girls in the room up there, half of them were ones Squall knew personally, squealing at the edge of the room. Selphie stood at the other side of the room, which was only about ten feet away. The loft didn't allow for a great deal of throwing distance between them.

Squall felt a tap on his shoulder. He cranked his head up and behind. Edea was standing beside him.

"Squall, can I see you for a second? In the kitchen?"

"Sure," he said, curious why she needed to see him right now, slightly worried. He crossed between the 'line of fire' before Selphie threw the bouquet and into the swinging door to the kitchen.

Matron was standing there, looking at the wall to the side, waiting for him. She looked like she was reading the health safety rules. She turned back and looked at him.

"Yes?" Squall said, after a moment of Edea not saying anything.

"Your, um, your suit just needed adjustment," she said as he heard a great cheer in the other room. Squall was about to turn and look outside when she turned him around by his lapels and pulled down his topcoat, straightening out the wrinkles, then brushed off the patch over his heart. Squall furrowed his brows, wondering what in the world she was doing, why that was so important he had to get called out.

"Are you having fun?" she asked as she adjusted.

"Yeah, I guess," he said with a hint of questioning.

"Good, after the events that I'd heard I was worried. I thought you've been handling things pretty well."

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said as she continued brushing. "... Are you done?"

"Yep, thanks," she said and stepped aside to let him through.

Squall eyed her warily before he turned and walked out. That was some really weird behavior.

He saw about ten guys standing in front of the railing where the girls had been. And they were all looking at him and smiling.

"What are you all doing over here?" he asked.

He heard a flick like a rubber band and felt something land on his head. He pulled it off and found it was some sort of frilly scrunchie. The people were cheering for him though and Irvine was stranding on the other side with his fingers left in the air, pointing at his target. The garter. He caught the garter. It had completely slipped his mind and he felt suddenly disappointed in himself for not seeing it ahead of time. He looked back to the kitchen at Matron who was looking at him with a sheepish smile on her face like 'they talked me into it'. Squall smirked and nodded lightly in understanding as the crowd whooped and hollered.

Squall retook his seat next to Rinoa, putting his prize on the table, feeling chagrined. Rinoa was laughing up a storm.

"I'm sorry, Squall," she said behind guffaws, "I had to do it. I wasn't even sure you'd go up there if we didn't do this."

"Uh-huh. Great joke."

Zell retook his seat across from Squall. "Way to go, man, you took one for the team!" he said as he gave his thumbs up.

Squall asked Rinoa, "So who caught the bouquet?"

Rinoa brought up the bunch of flowers she was keeping under the table, holding it under her face and batting her eyes coyly.

Squall sighed and smiled at her. She tickled him under the chin with the petals as he uttered, "Oh... goody."

With these final traditions completed, the wedding ceremony soon formally ended. Irvine thanked everybody for coming, announcing that essentially everything they had planned for was over. People slowly milled out, just as they had slowly milled in. Rinoa and Squall also said their goodbyes to the lingering couple and headed down to the coat room. They had to leave a little early as well, as they had to catch some sleep before getting on an early train back to Balamb. Rinoa requested a bathroom run before they headed out and stepped into the nearby restroom.

As Squall grabbed her coat off the hook, Zell came up behind Squall, and put his arm around his head in a pseudo-headlock. "Kick-ass party, man," he said into Squall's ear.

"Yeah," Squall answered politely back.

"I'll see you back at Garden. Later!" he called out as he dashed through the restaurant's doors and into the cold night, probably heading back to the hotel.

Just then Oscar and his wife Constance came down as well to get their coats. Rinoa came back and Squall put her coat on from behind, both of them amused at his acting like a proper gentleman. He tried to keep his back to the couple, but that didn't stop them.

"Nice wedding," the fat man said in a tone demanding to be answered by Squall. He mentally rolled his eyes and uttered a polite 'mm-hm'. What, were they stalking him now?

He led Rinoa out the door into the crisp night air, and the couple followed them out into the street. Unknowing passersbys might have thought the four of them were together by their proximity. They halted in front of the unmarked bus stop and looked down the street to see if one was on its way. "I hope you're not hailing a cab," Oscar said as they stopped behind them, pausing to adjust his wallet. "The bus is the only way to travel in Galbadia."

"I know," Squall finally said. "I've been here before."

"Oh, where are you from?"

"Balamb."

"Oh, do you do any fishing there?"

Balamb was an island with mountains on one side and shoreline on the other. The only town was half made of docks. Anyone who lived in Balamb had fished at some point in their lives, and everyone knew that. Asking someone from Balamb if they had ever fished was like asking a bird if it ever flew. But Squall had to correct him just the same.

"Actually, we're from Garden. We don't really have time to fish."

"Oh, are you both SeeDs?"

 _Hello? Dramatic jump off your clock tower? Tried to kill your sorceress? War with your Garden? Is any of this ringing a bell?_

"Yes," Squall simply said.

"Well, he is," Rinoa corrected. "I'm his girlfriend, I live with him."

"You live with him?" he said in surprise. "I was told SeeDs weren't supposed to have relationships."

Squall frowned. "It's not a formal rule, but it's generally discouraged."

"It's kind of a special exception," Rinoa said.

"Mm, see, I thought that was a rule," he repeated. "Seems to me Garden shouldn't be making special exceptions for anyone. That's just not sound during wartime. How else is there going to be any respect for regulations?"

 _So you criticize my Garden and my relationship in the same sentence. What else you got?_

Rinoa said, "We've been living together just fine for a year now. No one's had a problem with it."

"But there is a problem with it," his petite wife finally spoke up, the tone indicating she was shocked. Her lotioned eyes were popping out of her head like a frog's. "Did you know my sister co-habitated before she got married and now they're divorced? There's a reason it's against Galbadian law."

Oscar said, "What kind of SeeDs are you? Is this what Balamb is seriously producing?"

Constance said, "I'll pray for you."

It would be wrong to say Squall was just a bit stunned by this non sequitir. "... I'm sorry?"

"Living together before marriage is a sin and against the law. You're destroying your own relationship."

Squall finally realized what these two were saying enough for him to start getting angry about it. "What are you talking about... and what business is it of yours?"

"Marriage needs a lot of sacrifices and you're partaking of all the benefits without the responsibility. You're just playing marriage."

Squall furrowed his brows. "I can assure you that if you knew anything about us, you'd know that we have both made a lot of sacrifices to get where we are."

Rinoa added, "If we do get married we'll be even better equipped to handle the tough stuff cause we've already gone through it all."

"But you're not training for marriage, you're training how to get out of the relationship if it goes sour. You need to live separately beforehand so you can sanctify each other. Right now, you're just sizing him up as a trial offer. I thought SeeDs knew better than that."

Apparently no one had taught this girl about the legend of the sorceress and a knight and their bond. And even if they did, there would be no way she would be able to understand it, unless she were in such a relationship. The Galbadian bus rounded the corner and slowed to a crawl in front of their street as Squall simply scowled back, unable to get a response out before she continued her tirade.

The wife continued, "Your marriage is not going to be determined by whether you've tried each other out at all. It'll work out if you're made of the right stuff, the values and traits you have."

"The stuff SeeDs are made out of would scare you to your bones," Rinoa shot back. "And I am not 'trying' him out and he is not 'trying' me out. We love each other."

"Why not just get married if you do love each other?"

"Because we're not ready yet. We haven't even considered that yet. And it's certainly none of your business how we do things our way!"

Squall, unwilling or unable to argue with these despots any further, climbed up the tall metal stairs of the bus as the door opened.

The wife continued, "Living together is only asking for trouble. If you're willing to separate, your relationship will be further blessed."

Rinoa spun on her heel, midway up the stairs, and leaned out staring her straight in the eye, and with a tone halfway between angry and apathetic she delivered a resounding comeback.

"Whatever."

Rinoa climbed back on, and the stunned woman stared stupidly ahead, apparently having never been talked to in such a tone. The bus driver apparently had no patience for stragglers and swung the door lever closed. Quickly, the bus accelerated as Rinoa rejoined Squall.

"Nice," he said, commending her on a 'whatever' worthy of himself.

"Thank you," she gleefully responded.

They both sighed and looked out the windows, hanging onto the pole straps. Rinoa nudged into Squall's coat, half-draggled from the excitement, and Squall tranquilly watched the city's buildings pass by as he thought about that parochial argument. And he realized something. Something rather poignant, now that this whole mess was done with. No matter who you are, someone, somewhere, doesn't like what you're doing.


	14. Day 14: Sunday

DAY 14 - SUNDAY

EPILOGUE

Rinoa and Squall opened the door and eagerly rushed in. They had spent an all-nighter on the train back from Galbadia.

"Oh, it's good to be home," she said as she stretched her arms and plopped her backpack on the ground.

"You didn't sleep well on the train?" Squall asked.

"Mm-mm," Rinoa belied as she reached her arms to the sky. "Not really." She walked into the bedroom and glided onto the bed like a flying squirrel. In one smooth motion, she put her arms under her head and feigned sleep while resting perpendicular to the bed.

Squall took his suitcase and followed her into the room.

"Oh, no more wedding," she sighed with relief. "No more plans, no more shoe-shopping, no more nails getting done, no more calling people."

 _Yeah, for us,_ Squall thought, _for them, life is just starting. And for me..._

Squall sat on the bed, next to her prone form. "No more Selphie and Irvine," he continued for her.

"Yeah," she said as she turned on her back. "I'm going to miss them too."

"They only get two weeks of marital bliss before he ships off." Squall put his hands behind him and looked up at the ceiling. "We have it pretty good, don't we?"

"Yeah, we do," she said dreamily. "Wait, what do you mean?"

"Our relationship. We've struggled, but that's just made our bond stronger. Like steel that's been reinforced by melting it down and building it back up."

"Yeah, I guess so," Rinoa said, a little confused.

 _God, there really is no way to do this. How do I lead into it? There's no link, it's just not flowing. I can't just blurt it out._

"What are you thinking?" she said.

"You know the difference between Selphie and Irvine's relationship and our's? Besides the obvious, I mean."

"What?"

"We have time on our side. We don't let things get out of control. It feels like we're already so important to each other because of our bond. We know we'll always be in each other's lives, so there's no need to rush anything. I think we were pretty lucky that way."

"Yeah. We take everything as it comes and work it out. At least, we don't have many surprises because we're not impulsive."

"Are you saying I'm too predictable?"

"No, I'm saying you're just the right amount of predictable."

"Uh... this might throw off your scale."

Squall pulled out the nightstand drawer and reached into it, pulling out a purple velvet box. He presented it to her. She immediately sat up.

"Is this..."

He opened it immediately before she got the wrong idea. It was a white gold ring with a band of diamonds in the middle on the top. Clearly it was not an engagement ring.

"Oh, Squall, it's beautiful. Should I wear it on my finger or necklace?"

"Finger. Do you know what a promise ring is?"

"What?" she said deadpanned.

"It's sort of 'engaged-to-be-engaged'. Promised to each other. Zell told me about it."

"Oh my God, Squall..." she said as she put it on and held it up to the light to look at it sparkle. She looked like she was on the verge of tears.

Squall continued, "I thought the wedding might kinda overshadow it, but..."

"I love you, Squall," she wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

Squall returned the hug. "I love you too, Rin."

She loosened her hold and gripped onto the two rings around her neck. "Heh, at this rate I'm going to be flooded with rings."

Squall snickered back. "I didn't think it was time for an engagement ring yet, but I wanted to get you something that shows we belong to each other before I ship off."

"Ship off?"

Squall nodded. "I'm taking Irvine's place on the mission, after eight months, about halfway through, so he can come back and see his baby get born."

"Oh my God, Squall... are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. No father should be away from his child in its crucial months. The commander of Garden should be able to do something about that. So I did."

"But what about the special skills they need Irvine for?"

"Sniping? There'll be two experienced SeeDs with the same skill on the mission, they'll back me up. I arranged it so the contract money's still the same so they agreed to it. Now the monsters will just have to deal with the commander of Garden close up."

Rinoa leaned in and held Squall. "Be careful," she whispered.

"I haven't left yet, heh." Squall bit his lip. "Are you okay with this?"

Rinoa looked up at him. "I'm proud of you."

That was all the validation he needed.

* * *

"Well, Squall, your report looks all in order. I'll make the call to Galbadia this week, and I'll let Irvine and Selphie know... after the honeymoon, of course."

"Of course," Squall said to Cid.

The old man adjusted his glasses and rubbed his hands together. Squall was about to leave, but it looked like the headmaster had something else on his mind to say before he would let him go.

"I must say, I was quite surprised when you put in this request. I was initially opposed to granting it, seeing as how we'd be without our commander for a few months. What motivated you to do this?"

"I thought Irvine's mission span was needlessly long, especially given the circumstances. I was really the only other viable candidate, so I volunteered myself."

"Mm, quite noble. Did something change your mind?"

"Nothing changed my mind." That was true, he still held true to his original convictions. He was just a little softer about them. Perhaps everything wasn't so bad. It was all right to have opinions, just not to shove them down people's throats. "This is the best thing for everyone. Irvine gets to be back for his kid, the mission still has a capable offensive force, and I get less paperwork to do."

"Hm," Cid chuckled. He leaned back and sighed. "It's been quite a tumultuous two weeks, hasn't it? I'm just curious. How do you think everything will turn out?"

"Sir?"

"Mm?" Cid asked.

"I don't understand the question."

"I just want your personal opinion on this one, now that everything's all over and done with."

He was referring to the matter of Selphie and Irvine and their future.

Cid said, "I mean, how you reacted."

Squall thought of what to say.

Cid said, "You said their lives are over."

"I did."

Squall contemplated this weird test Cid was putting before him. He was being set up for something, some answer. He was never sure what answer to give though. Cid wanted to know whether he held true to his beliefs, if he was just putting on a mask of happiness for the sake of the couple, or whether he stood by his previous statements. The problem was, he wasn't sure what his opinion _was_ anymore. However, he believed, whenever you were presented with a loaded question, it was best to give an honest answer.

"I did say that. The lives they wanted are over. But they've been replaced by new lives. Different lives they didn't want, but they're not so horrible. I thought they were, so I resisted, I got too involved. It was never my place to interfere, it wasn't my business. But due to my role and responsibility, I felt like I had to. I couldn't live with myself if I hadn't said anything."

"So you didn't want the kid to turn out like you."

Squall thought, and realized how true this was. "I suppose. I wouldn't want anyone to go through what I went through growing up."

"Yet, look how you are now. You're successful, you're opening up more. You're improving."

"But I had to fight through all the obstacles to get there. I was lucky. Not everyone can do that. And no one should have to go through that."

"You can't save everyone, Mr. Leonhart."

"I can't? Then what am I doing in Garden?" he said with his raised eyebrow.

Cid smiled broadly and laughed. It was rare for Squall to make a joke. He nodded. "So, do you think they will have a happy ending? Is this the final chapter of their fantasy?"

"That's the thing, sir... it never will be final. Some might call it an end just because there's a conclusion, but that doesn't mean there is an end. They don't realize that there's no such thing as an end to it. In fact, it's the opposite. One end starts a new beginning, and on and on. Though something might seem final, it clearly isn't the end." There was a pause. "And I for one hope it stays that way."

Cid had his hands clasped, elbows on the desk, the ceiling light reflecting into his glasses so his eyes were obscured. He must have been thinking about Squall's words, from what he could tell. Grading his test, so to speak.

"Thank you, Commander Leonhart. I just wanted to know your opinion. Dismissed."

-END-

* * *

Special Thanks to ashbear, altol, mintbaby, Chendzeea Li, Ms. Starlight, Nique/Lina, Dark Raion, Refugee, and SeiferFetish for writing great stories and special thanks to those who chose to be beta readers/editors for me


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